


Flying with Tattered Wings

by Sensiblytainted



Series: Broken Mind [3]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Anal, Anal Sex, Blood Kink, Endgame Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, Established Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, F/F, Female Slash, Good Severus Snape, Harry Potter Has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Injury Recovery, M/M, Male Slash, Married Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, Mental Anguish, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Mentor Severus Snape, Mpreg, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rape Recovery, Recovery, Severus Snape Adopts Harry Potter, Severus Snape Has a Heart, Slash, Wedding Fluff, Wedding Planning, Weddings, f/f - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-28
Updated: 2018-06-01
Packaged: 2019-04-29 02:40:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 59,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14463231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sensiblytainted/pseuds/Sensiblytainted
Summary: Long Epilogue to Shadows Within the Light! Harry Potter is dead and Shadow Snape lives in his place, or, well, dreams in his place. He's in a coma. Can his adopted father, Severus Snape, and boyfriend, Draco Black, an ex-Malfoy, help? As Shadow continues to recover under Draco's watchful eye, love finds their friends and family. Maybe, just maybe, they can have a happily ever after of their own.





	1. Flying with Tattered Wings

**A/N:** Welcome to the long epilogue of Shadows Within the Light, which was the sequel to Broken Mind, Fractured Soul. You don't need to read the preceding novels to understand this epilogue, but I do recommend it. Otherwise, read with a suspension of disbelief. The personalities of the characters will be similar to canon but with differences that were evolved over the course of the two previous stories.

 **A/N2:** This story covers sensitive issues. The first chapter, especially, is dark in nature. Be prepared when you read it that there is highly emotional and mildly graphic content.

This is rated **M** for **Mature** for a reason.

...

**Flying with Tattered Wings**

_~ Friday, March 2nd 1999 ~_

The dark cupboard curled around him. Painful threats boomed outside his walls. He shivered with icy dread but reassured himself that he was safe in his cupboard. Uncle couldn't get in… Couldn't… get in…

"Filthy, _disgusting_ **freak**! You need to learn your place, **boy**! No good _brat_. You're a **burden** to everyone around you! I'll _beat_ the freakishness out of you!"

A booted foot slammed into his ribs. He howled with pain and fear. "No! Please! I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Uncle! I'll be good. I'll be GOOD!"

Like deja-vu, a strange awareness shimmered through him. Like he'd been in this place a hundred times before. With a howl of determination, he pulled away from the sick fear and endless pain.

Rose looked on as Uncle beat the child at his feet. Boy was on his knees, his skinny arms wrapped around his head. White agony crackled around his broken body, highlighted by bright flares of orange. It was the color of deep-seated fear. Black emotions poured from her Uncle. Flashes of bright green, sick greed, hellishly lit his face.

Her attention slipped away from the horrific scene and instead caught on the blood staining the end of the bedspread. Aunt Petunia would be so upset to see her bed covers dirtied. Very carefully, she pulled the quilt off; it would be horrible if she got blood on the sheets as well.

Aunt Petunia was standing in the kitchen, her arms crossed over her chest. The midnight blue surrounding the woman told Rose that her aunt doubted she'd be able to clean the quilt without ruining it. Rose smiled brightly. She was almost excited. She'd get the blanket as clean as new and then her Aunt would have to be happy with her.

Silas watched as Rose cheerfully stuffed the washing machine with the bloodied quilt. A sneer stretched his face. He was sincerely glad he'd cast a spell to make himself invisible. He would rather stab himself in the arm before talking with his hated Aunt. Disgusted, he left through the back door, almost smiling when he heard Petunia shriek in fear as the door seemingly opened and shut by itself.

He would escape this hellhole. Escape this crappy neighborhood with all the perfect little houses and the perfectly horrible families. He'd leave all these scumbags behind and never look back. Until then, he'd watch and wait. He'd survive to make the Dursleys _truly_ regret ever knowing him.

Silas Apparated to the school library. It was the only place that held any interest to him. The rows of books soothed his temper, while the quiet calmed his jarred nerves. It was here that he would learn how to protect himself. No one would have power over him again. Striding forward, he removed a tome and curled comfortably on a window seat. A picture of a basilisk lay before him. He gasped as the gigantic snake came to life and jumped off the page.

Gabriel felt more alive than ever before. Adrenaline pumped through his veins; his senses were sharp to any little change. He dodged as the basilisk stuck down and nimbly avoided the coils that tried to wrap around him. Slash, stab, roll, jump… He felt a breeze as the massive head passed inches from his vulnerable skin. Fangs glistened with deadly poison. His life hung in the balance and survival depended on his skill alone.

"That all you got?" he laughed breathlessly.

The beast reared back in frustrated fury. Heart beating hard in his chest, he recognized his chance. He stabbed upward, twisting his body out of reach. The sword pierced the top of the mouth. The snake spasmed violently before collapsing. Gabriel gave a wild victory cry, his fist pumping the air. Practically vibrating, he turned to the innocent child lying helplessly at the foot of a massive statue. She was saved.

Kit shook her head. Boys were so stupid. Why fight when there were so much better things to do? She head back toward the bedrooms. A nice, long bath sounded good. Her hips swayed sensually as she thought of the pleasurable night ahead of her.

A hand grabbed her wrist and she turned to see that the man had come upon her unawares. Her heart beat faster in surprise as he lifted her up and carried her to a large canopy bed. His long-fingered hands traveled up her shirt and Kit spread her legs to accommodate his body. Goosebumps erupted along her arms as his hand grabbed a fistful of her hair, forcing her to expose her throat. She moaned, dazed, pulling him closer.

"So beautiful… Kitten…"

Demon stormed through the forest in a fit of rage. A castle burned and crumbled behind him, hundreds were dead, including that vile man and slutty girl, but it wasn't enough. Vile hatred bubbled up from his stomach. He reached out to obliterate the disgusting world that existed before him. He would destroy it all, _everything_ , and set himself free. Flinging his head back, he screamed.

Destruction exploded from his body… 

… until nothing else existed…

… not even himself…

**xXx**

Draco watched silently as Shadow panted and sweated, his anorexic body rigid under his blankets. It took hours before his love went limp, his eyes stilling behind bruised lids. The nightmare was over. Draco took up the cloth by the bed and gently washed Shadow's face clean. When he was sure Shadow was resting peacefully, he rose smoothly and silently left the room.

The house was quiet. He could hear Omi in the kitchen, pans clanking quietly. Severus was underground, consumed with his potions. They had no visitors at the moment, so there was no one to see him slip silently out the front door or the feverish glint in his eyes.

Draco strode down the gentle hill and was soon embraced by sparse woods that surrounded the house. The sky was moonless yet he could see clearly. Not as you would in the day. It was a strangely flat and colorless rendition while the slightest motion lit up his vision. He was hungry. Sharp pains gripped his insides and soon instincts would seep through his mind until what was looking out from behind his eyes wasn’t human in the slightest but a monster.

Severus's potion helped tame his urges, but they could not suppress them completely. There was still no cure for vampirism. Not fully monster, not fully human, Draco maintained a very delicate balance. It wore on him, exhausted him, and he would have long ago given up the tightrope walk his life had become if it wasn't for Shadow.

"He sleeps still?"

Draco nodded his head once. The hunger was too strong to form human words.

"Winter is fading," Neville remarked as he moved to walk alongside the blond.

Grey eyes flashed to the left. The ex-Gryffindor had grown despite spending most of his time with his mind deep in the Earth. He stood at an even six feet, his shoulders broad, his muscles defined. His brown hair was long, coming to the middle of his back. His feet were bare. Draco had brought Neville the thin, baggy sweater and slacks he wore. They were beginning to look tattered. He'd have to bring more soon. 

As was his custom now, Draco avoided the brunet's dark brown eyes. Neville had the eyes of a monk; a holy man who'd seen something beyond the simple reality of life most were limited to experience.

"Your hunger is strong."

For Neville to notice, Draco knew he was closer to the edge than he'd realized. Shadow had been having a hard week, his dreams restless and disturbing. He hated to leave him in such a state, so he'd stayed in for six consecutive nights. Now he'd need more than his usual round with the whores in town to tame his bloodlust.

"Take my hand."

Draco didn't hesitate. Neville rarely offered assistance, but whenever he did, it was always worth it.

As their hands connected, Draco felt a strange sensation - a mix between Apparation and a portkey - before his feet hit the ground in a little park. Dum beats vibrated through his body to the symphony of human shouts. He'd been brought to a carnival; he'd guess in Italy from the feel of the spicy air.

His senses kicked into overdrive and Draco moved sensually into the crowd. Within minutes, he had a young man on one arm and a topless female on the other. Beads clinked around their necks and alcohol seeped from their pores. Sensual words poured from their mouths. Draco smiled, his eyes glowing, mesmerizing them. They melted into his embrace as he pulled them into a narrow alley.

The young man laughed as he was spun face-first against the wall. The woman gasped as Draco's long fingers slipped inside her heat. With his free hand, Draco quickly prepared the boy even as he had the woman writhing and cumming, drenching his fingers in her slick. Soon the two were held up solely by Draco's inhuman strength. Their cries grew louder, quicker.

Draco buried his face in the girl's hair. He panted, his mouth wide open. Fangs descended from his upper gum. It took every ounce of control to keep from biting, but Severus’s potion worked and let him transform his bloodlust into simple lust. It kept him human that way. If even one drop of human blood touched his lips, he’d transform into a soulless vampire completely and no potion would be able to save him then. 

Hunger pushed away all thoughts. Wiped them out until all he could feel and see and hear was the beat of their three hearts, his - the girl - the boy. He focused on his impending orgasm. Narrowed his whole world to the sensations of his physical body. Growling, he tipped over the edge and flung his head back to be certain he would not break his prey's fragile skin.

The boy splattered the wall with his spunk. Draco let him go to fall bonelessly to the alley floor as he spread the girl’s thighs, lifted her completely off the ground, and slammed deep inside her wet heat, making her cries rise in decibel. 

Draco raced toward a second release, needing it to keep his sanity. Her body folded around his, her legs wrapping high around his waist. He reveled in her. Felt the rise and fall of her chest as her full breasts pillowed against his chest. Her sweat, her need, her juices flowing from her body, coating his own. He came with a bestial cry. Each completion loosened the grip the inhuman hunger held on him.

Like the boy, her knees gave out and she rested, dazed against the alley wall. Draco smoothed their hair in a gesture of gratitude before closing his pants and reentering the crowd. He surveyed the hundreds of inebriated humans dancing, twirling, singing around him, searching for the next willing body.

**xXx**

Back in England, Hermione stared into a full length mirror on the back of her door. She didn't see herself. She saw the room behind her instead. The end of her twin bed with rumpled covers. Books that sat on the floor, on the corner of her desk, on a shelf above the bed. A shirt carelessly discarded. A pair of pants draped over the back of the chair. There was no window, no light, except from the bare sixty-watt bulb above her head.

It was a perfectly Muggle dorm room at a perfectly Muggle University. There was no wand, or quills, or parchment. She'd left that behind long ago. Unfortunately, it didn't seem like magic was willing to grant her the same favor. Hermione's eyes slid to the reflection of her hand. A thick envelope with a wax seal could be seen.

The letters had come often at first, but as the years passed, they stopped coming. She'd almost had the past locked completely away when this one had come today. Then it had all come crashing back. Like it was yesterday, pain gripped her chest. A hot burning anger clawed at her sides, guilt seared through her stomach, and heart-wrenching grief shattered her heart.

She hated them for sending the blasted letter. Hated herself.

Why hadn't she thrown it away? She could turn around to her desk and burn it, but instead she stood there and looked at its reflection in the mirror, as if looking at it without an intermediary would strike her dead. The memory of Second-year at Hogwarts almost brought her to her knees. Tears scorched her cheeks and her mouth twisted in an ugly grimace. Her fist balled the torturous envelope, but still her fingers clung to the thick paper. Some masochistic urge had her tearing it open and unfolding the letter.

_On the anniversary of the War's End, we are hosting the third Remembrance memorial for those who were lost. We would like you to attend and perhaps say a few words in remembrance of Ronald._

_\- Mrs. Molly Weasley_

The letter fell from her limp hand as Hermione crumbled to her knees and sobbed.

**xXx**

_~ Saturday, March 3rd 1999 ~_

Severus felt grasped by a torturous hand every time he laid eyes upon his fragile son. Ever so gently, he carefully wiped the freshly fallen tears from Shadow's cheeks. It killed him. This waiting and watching. He needed to cure his child, to save him, but Severus was incapable of these things no matter how hard he pushed for an answer.

"You usually give him a calming potion by now," Draco muttered sleepily. The sun was still up, so it was amazing he was awake at all. It revealed the extent of his anxiety.

"I have come to believe he must face whatever he is enduring if we ever hope to have him awaken."

Draco moved further into the room. His limbs were heavy, his gait languid.

Severus eyed him carefully. "Have you eaten?"

"I am not hungry." With a soft sigh, he sat on the edge of the bed. His hand lay limp beside his love's thin arm. "He's suffering."

Severus said nothing to that. It was true, but plying Shadow with calming potions when he'd shown signs of distress hadn't produced any improvement. Severus’s dark eyes lifted to observe Draco's profile. Shadow wasn't the only one suffering. 

"Sleep with him. He rests better when you are near." 

It wasn't true, nothing outside reached his son's consciousness. Shadow was in a coma, his world existed only in dreams, but Severus knew it made Draco feel better to believe it.

The blond nodded and tipped forward. His dark-circled eyes shut before his head rested on the pillow.

Severus left quietly, giving Draco privacy. A few moments later, he found himself in the dining room. It was strange. For the past few years, he usually took his meals in the lab, but he'd reached the point where he could admit to himself that his efforts were in vain.

As soon as he sat in a chair, Omi appeared. "What may I get you, Master?" Even the elf's exuberance was slightly dulled.

"Coffee. Breakfast."

It was late afternoon, so dinner would have been appropriate, but Severus wasn't in the mood for something that elaborate. He sat silently as the minutes passed. His mind was still, his spirit exhausted. Eventually a plate appeared before him. Tomatoes, eggs with onions, fried potatoes, toast… There was no meat. Any blood or flesh aggravated Draco's condition. Draco couldn't stand it in inside the house, his sanctuary. Severus had become a vegetarian with Draco as a consequence.

"Severus!" Marissa shouted as she came running into the room. Her face was lit with a bright smile and her copper curls bounced around her angelic face. The little girl stopped within reach and bowed. She was well accustomed to Severus's disdain for hugs.

"And how is the little lady?" he asked seriously.

"Up to no good," Sirius answered for her as he strode into the room. He smiled lovingly at his adopted daughter before his attention shifted to the Potions Master. "How's Shadow?"

"The same."

"Can I go see him?" Marissa asked. "I want to read him the new story Papa bought me."

"When the sun sets," Severus answered. "Draco is sleeping with him now."

"Really? Can I got sleep with him, too?" She adored Draco despite the way he'd pulled away from her. "I haven't thanked him for my birthday present yet."

"You shouldn't have opened it as of yet. It is only Saturday, I believe," Severus drawled, an eyebrow raised at the man across from him. They didn't know Marissa's true birthday, so they had decided to celebrate it on the day of her adoption, which so happened to be March 6th, two days after the final battle had occurred.

"She pestered me for days!" Sirius protested. "Draco shouldn't have sent it to her so early!"

"Can I go?" the little girl asked again, bouncing in her seat.

"Let them rest," Severus denied. "Are you hungry?"

Marissa pouted and turned her begging eyes to her father.

Sirius winced, but he held his ground under Severus's watchful dark gaze. "Have something to eat, pumpkin."

"Fine." She huffed and called loudly, "Omi!"

The elf appeared instantly. "Yes, little madam?"

"Can I have some peaches and cream-sauce?"

"Right away, madam," he answered before disappearing again.

"Have you heard about Teddy's escapades?"

Marissa giggled. "He turned himself all red and goes around hissing at people! It's so funny! He won't turn back no matter what Uncle Remus or Auntie Tonks tells him."

"I wonder where he got the idea." Sirius narrowed his eyes at his daughter.

"I just told him what an imp was. It's not my fault you keep calling him that!" Marissa protested.

"This has been going on for almost two weeks. We can't take him into public!" Sirius exclaimed to a bemused Severus.

"Terrible twos holding up to their reputation?"

"Shuddup, Snape." Sirius sighed dramatically. "You really have no idea how exhausting that kid can be."

Marissa giggled, but she smiled innocently when her father mock glared at her.

Severus chuckled. "Are you sure you're not having more trouble with the six-year-old?"

"Hey! I'm seven!" she protested hotly from around her mouthful of peaches.

"Not until Tuesday," Severus corrected and smirked when she glared at him in response.

"How are your potions going?" Sirius asked seriously. His eyes darkened in worry when Severus merely shook his head in answer. "That bad?"

"I have come to the conclusion that Shadow's condition is too specific and delicate. It does not help that I am uncertain as to what exactly ails him."

"So you're giving up?" Sirius quickly amended his statement when he sat the other man flinch. "Not that I blame you. You've tried everything."

"Shadow's never going to get better?" Marissa asked anxiously. Her eyes jumped back and forth between the two men, her treat forgotten completely. "Can't you fix him, Sev'rus?"

"I cannot.” He raised his hand when she looked on the verge of tears. "But that is not to say he will never awaken. I believe it is something that he must do on his own. We can only wait for him."

"I think it's dark by now," Sirius interrupted cheerfully. "Why don't you go up and see Draco. Don't forget to thank him for your birthday gift."

Marissa looked like she might argue, but in the end she nodded and raced from the room.

"Are we still having the party here?" Sirius asked carefully. 

Severus and Draco had always looked worn down, but this was the worst he'd seen Severus in a long time. The man's hair hung in heavy, greasy locks, his skin was paler than ever, untouched by the sun, and depression sat heavily on his shoulders.

"Yes, of course. Omi is looking forward to it. As is Draco, I believe," Severus answered tiredly.

"Maybe you should get some rest…"

"I am fine."

The silence stretched until the sound of Marissa's laughter drifted down the stairs.

"Perhaps I shall take a small nap," Severus relented. The silence was so hard to deal with, but perhaps with people moving about he'd actually get some sleep. "I'm sure you wish to see Shadow, as well."

Sirius offered his once-enemy an understanding smile before rising and running up the stairs, taking them two at a time. "You better not be annoying, Draco, you little monster!"

**xXx**

Luna drifted through Hogwarts. Her hips swayed as her hands weaved a slow pattern in the air around her. Her thigh-length, dirty blonde hair floated around her body. The setting sun painted the stone corridor in colors of orange and gold. She laughed and, stepping up on her toes, she did a twirl. Spring scented the air; the cold was losing its claws and teeth. She stopped at a window and looked outside over the Forbidden Forest. Her delighted smile softened as she saw a shadowy figure move under the mysterious canopy.

 _Child of Earth…_ she thought dreamily, but then her mind cleared a bit. _I miss Neville._

"I miss him, too."

Luna turned to see Ginny. Her glorious red hair was cut severely short in a military style. Her eyes were hard and her mouth no longer gave easily to smiles or laughter. They were sad changes.

"Have you heard from him?"

"Not directly," Luna answered. She moved away from the window, offering the view to the other girl. "I see him in the shadows sometimes."

"Shadows…" Ginny stepped forward and gripped the stone window sill with tense hands. "Have you heard from him, then? Or Hermione?"

"They occupy a space too dark to reach, but don't worry, Ginny. Spring is coming."

Ginny shook her head and crossed her arms. "They abandoned us. They won't come again no matter how many springs come and go."

"They didn't abandon us…" Luna reached out for the girl who used to be a Fire Child. Now Ginny held only embers and forged metal blades in her heart.

"Don't defend them. Shadow said from the beginning he was done with this world once the war was over. I can forgive him. He at least took his family with him. But Hermione… No."

"They are trusting us to carry on, to be ready for them when they recover and come home." Luna grabbed her hand. "Did you pass?"

"By the skin of my teeth, but I got in. I'm going to be training as an Auror come August."

There was a moment of comfortable silence. The girls stood shoulder-to-shoulder, connected by their mutual grip on one another.

"Thanks, Luna," Ginny said softly, eyes forward on the outside scene. "After the war, the last thing people wanted to do was study more combat and practice dueling. They were so eager to push all that far, far away, but you always helped me." Shaking her head, she gave a wry laugh. "Can you believe we graduate in just over two months?"

Luna flashed a grin. "It will be a grand adventure."

"Are you coming with me to the Burrow tomorrow?"

"Remembrance Day wouldn't be the same without friends." Luna looked up into the taller girl's eyes. "Shall I bring a Hornblast to your mother? I'm sure I could find one around here somewhere…"

"There's no such thing," Ginny dismissed, although she didn't know why she continued to bother. Luna was Luna. She wasn't going to change. Sometimes that was annoying, but sometimes it was comforting. "I have to go. Halls to patrol."

Luna waved happily as the Gryffindor walked away. When she was alone again, she turned her attention back to the window. She waited patiently until the last sliver of light leaked from the wide open skies. She leaned far out over the sill, bringing her mouth closer to the oak that stood in the garden below.

"Come find me at the equinox. I have something to show you. Something important, Neville dear. Don't forget."

With that said, she blew a kiss goodbye and disappeared deeper into the school with a skip in her step.

**xXx**

_~ Sunday, March 4th 1999 ~_

"Get the belt, freak."

The way he said it sent shivers down the small boy’s back. So calm, so matter-of-fact. Boy whimpered. With trembling hands, body drenched with sweat, he slunk up the stairs. Hyperventilating, he swung the bedroom door open. Aunt was reading. Her cold eyes never looked up. Shaking, nauseous, Boy went to the closet and grabbed the thickest belt with the heaviest buckle. It was Boy’s belt. 

A whine escaped his throat as phantom agony seared through his back and legs. He knew exactly what was waiting for him downstairs. He was shaking so hard, he almost couldn't keep a hold of his punishment.

Uncle was waiting. In the kitchen. It was easier to clean tile than carpet. He was grateful for that at least. He hated to disappoint Aunt when stains didn't come out. As he entered the room, he sank to his knees. Watery blue eyes glared at him from within a face twisted with hatred and anticipation, the two emotions flaring and snaking around his body in a sickening halo of color.

"Get over here, boy."

Sobbing, Boy crawled forward and offered the horrid instrument.

Uncle shoved a wad of socks forward.

He flinched but then obediently opened his mouth. The cloth would muffle his screams.

 _Wouldn't want the neighbors to hear,_ he sneered mentally. _Couldn't let them know there was a freak in the house._ And, this time, he wasn't referring to himself but his pathetic uncle who practically glowed with sick pleasure that he could beat his tiny nephew half-to-death.

With the first brutal strike of the leather against flesh, all his thoughts were downed out by bone-deep terror. He smashed into the floor, his back on fire as he curled over his knees. 

The belt whistled as it came down. He moaned miserably as it struck his flesh. The pain lit up his mind with lightning. He closed his eyes tight, grunting with each blow. Every lash pushed him closer to the edge of no return. He was shaking so hard now, his body threatening to fly apart at the seams.

The buckle viciously slammed into his temple. He cried out weakly and toppled limply to the blood-soaked tile. Unconsciousness teased and flirted, just out of reach. He was screaming now, but he was too weak to make it carry far. The neighbors would remain undisturbed.

"… no… _please_ …" he begged on a sob.

"Disgusting freak!”

The belt slithered to the ground. Relief almost brought the blessed darkness within reach. He looked up through swollen eyes. Uncle had a knife.

"I'll cut the filth from you…"

Boy gasped, his shaking hands coming up in supplication. The knife cut his palms and then slashed down at his chest. His back spasmed painfully as he was pressed onto the bleeding lashes by a hard shoe.

"Scream for me, freak…"

Uncle laughed, evil drenching him, pouring out and tainting everything in the room. Especially his victim.

Boy screamed. He arched and writhed as his chest was impaled again and again. Blood splattered his uncle, the floor, the wall, coated his skin. Blood choked him, oozed between his teeth, until he was limp and broken… He was lost… lost…

"Fix yourself and clean this mess."

Boy lay gasping, choking, coughing blood, nearly numb. Blind. Slowly… so slowly… the White magic responded to his heartfelt plea that his body be restored, that everything broken be healed. A desperate, painful wish to erase what had just happened… Make it so it NEVER happened… 

And the pain was pressed out… His body returned to him… and RAGE came boiling up from his stomach. His back arched as his fingers clawed at the slick tile. Hate them… hate them so much! The fury ruled him so completely, he couldn't think, could hardly breathe. It was too much and he passed out…

Sunlight woke him. Aunt was standing above him. She was disgusted. There was blood everywhere. Rose looked at the mess Boy had made, could see the child still curled up in the middle of it all, unconscious, comatose. But she couldn’t worry about Boy. Aunt was standing there, her lips moving in sharp little strokes. Anger radiated from her. Eager to please, to help her, Rose went to the sink. Underneath were the cleaning supplies she needed. She got the rags, the bleach, and felt satisfaction from Aunt. This made her smile. Yes, she could be good.

_Love me… please love me… Don't hurt us anymore…_

A wave of self-disgust washed over Rose, clung like slime. Deep down she knew they would never love her. It was proved again and again, written in blood and black hate. She hadn't known she was capable of such bravery, but she turned defiantly and met her Aunt's steely gaze. It sent her heart racing and a tremulous sense of power shimmering through her veins.

Aunt sneered, but the hateful woman couldn't hold Gabriel’s eyes. Petunia turned away and began making breakfast.

 _Coward,_ he accused her silently.

He stood there and stared for a moment longer before looking down at the rag in his hand, the pail by his feet. He dropped the rag and marched out of the room. He wasn't going to help Rose clean up after Uncle this time. He stormed to his cupboard and pulled on the hand-me-downs he'd been given to wear. Panic swirled in his gut. He'd be punished for this for sure. Shaking his head, Gabriel pushed forward and opened the front door.

The warm sunlight hit his face, spilled over his shoulders. He laughed as he ran away from Privet Drive. He ran until, trembling, he fell to his knees. He rolled off the sidewalk. Grass cradled his body. Closing his eyes, he let the sun warm the ice in his marrow. It felt so good.

He lifted his hands and blocked out the sun. It streamed through his fingers. He imagined it was reaching for him. It was sad he was trying to push it away. It loved him. His hand fell, and he was immediately pulled into a warm embrace. Tears spilled. He tried to ignore them, tried to stay in this rare moment where something, _anything_ loved him, but he couldn't stop it. Helpless, defeated sobs wracked his frame.

**xXx**

Remembrance Day was one of both joy and sorrow. Families gathered to remember how dark things had been at the end of the war and acknowledge the sacrifices and efforts of those who made peace and prosperity possible. It was a time of celebration, but it was important to remember the cost, so as not to take such a time for granted.

Ginny didn't need Remembrance Day to remind her of the costs of the war. Every day was a remembrance day for her. In her opinion, they were wrong to so blindly embrace peace. The only thing that would keep more dark times at bay would be effort and vigilance. Had they been smarter, quicker, Voldemort wouldn't have had the chance to rise as high as he did before being taken down. With this in mind, she flooed home and into her mother's grasping arms.

"Ginny!" Molly kissed her daughter's cheek and lovingly ran her hand over her sheered locks. "How are you? Are you doing well at school?"

"Yes, Mum. I received my Auror training results. I passed. I start in August."

Molly forced a smile. She hated the fact that her only daughter was so bound and determined to place herself in harms way, but at least it was after the war. Things should be safer now. "That's wonderful, dear. I know how difficult it is to get into that program."

"Thanks." Ginny carefully maneuvered them further from the fireplace just as it flared and Luna stepped out.

"Luna! How wonderful that you could make it."

Ginny used the distraction to escape her mother's grasp. She slipped into the kitchen and smiled as Bill pulled her into a hug. "How are you?" she asked, looking up into his slightly deformed features.

Bill smiled, elongated canines flashing in his mouth. "Well, Fleur is expecting."

"Merlin…" Ginny breathed. Her brother had been trying for years. They had almost given up, believing the werewolf attack had rendered him infertile. "Congratulations!"

"Thanks, sis." Bill kissed her cheek and released her. "How about you? Did you get into the program?"

"Yep. Got my acceptance letter last week."

"Good job, Gin!" Bill punched her shoulder affectionately.

"Who else is here?" she asked, stepping over to the stove to smell the cooking food.

"Fleur is setting up the picnic tables with George and Percy. Dad is talking with the Diggorys out in the garden. The Lupins and Blacks should be here momentarily."

Ginny nodded. "And you're stuck with kitchen duty?"

Bill laughed softly. "I don't feel comfortable in crowds. You know that."

"Enough chatter," Molly scolded as she returned to her domain. "It's almost time for lunch! We have to finish this up."

Ginny fled outside and greeted the rest of her family. An hour of small talk later, Molly called for them to all sit down. Lunch was a lively affair. Fleur and Tonks talked excitedly about babies while Teddy and Marissa fired questions at Bill about his appearance. Halfway through the meal, Teddy changed his features to match the eldest Weasley sibling.

"Bill! Don't encourage him!"

"At least he's not all red," Remus reassured Molly with a smile. "Better a wolf than an imp."

Molly blushed, flustered. "I can't imagine the difficulties of raising a shape shifter."

"It can be difficult," he allowed but with a tender smile down the table at his son.

"Are you kidding?" Sirius barked out a laugh. "The kid's going to be the ultimate prankster of his generation!"

"As long as he's not caught, I think I can live with that."

"Remus!" Molly scolded.

The two men laughed.

The first two Remembrance Days had been similar to this one with happy chatter between close friends and family. Ginny had been baffled. She'd come expecting solemn moods and talk of those they were there to remember. It had angered her terribly. Ron was dead and it seemed like no one cared, but this year Ginny understood better. It wasn't that they didn't care; Ron wouldn't have wanted her or anyone else to stop living their lives. They were honoring that wish.

Luna smiled at her from across the table. She'd been trying to explain this to Ginny for a while. The redhead saw her expression and blushed, gently kicking her friend under the table. Luna, of course, expected that and had moved her leg. Instead, Ginny kicked Mrs. Diggory.

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" Ginny said quickly, shooting a glare Luna's way.

Luna stared innocently back.

"Let's begin," Molly announced as the plates and leftover food were spelled back into the kitchen. "Thank you all for coming for this year's Remembrance Day. We are all here and healthy due to the efforts and sacrifices we've all had to make. Let us go around the table and speak of someone who gave their life to make today possible."

While Molly spoke, Arthur had passed out candles. She gestured for Sirius to begin.

He stood and looked around at the group in front of him. "Last year, I asked you all to remember my godson, Harry Potter. This year I want to remember Draco." Sirius ducked his head as everyone stared at him in surprise. Clearing his throat, he continued. "He may still be alive, but… Vampirism is worse than lycanthropy in many ways. It doesn't just overcome him once a month. He lives with these horrible urges every single night. He can no longer eat meat or go out during the daytime. I think he truly did lose his life just as much as those who died. The only thing keeping him from giving in and becoming a soulless creature is his remarkable dedication and strength of will."

Sirius then lifted his candle and lit it. Everyone remained silent, honoring the one Sirius wished to remember, as the candle slowly floated into the air to hover over the solemn man.

Remus stood next. "I am honored to be the one to ask that we all remember Harry Potter. He not only sacrificed his life by dying to protect us, he sacrificed his childhood for us as well to become the Savior we needed."

The candle was lit and rose into the air to join Sirius's.

Tonks rose. "I'd like to remember Charlie Weasley. He was a great leader of the Order. He put his people's needs before his own and led us with a fair, guiding hand despite his young age." She sat and hugged Teddy, who had sensed her sadness and crawled into her lap.

"I want to remember my Angel," Marissa said simply. No one asked her to explain further. This was a private moment where you could say as little or as much as you needed.

Bill stood and held the candle in a slightly clawed hand. "I light this candle in remembrance of Michael Story. He was a good friend of mine; we worked together at the bank. He died alongside more skilled Aurors. He was a very brave man who always did what was right, no matter what it cost him."

Fleur spoke in soft and beautiful French. Her candle rose up and joined the others.

Percy went next. "I wish to remember Albus Dumbledore." There was a shocked breath from the others. It was well known that he and Fudge had worked together to try and discredit the old Headmaster for years. "As I spend more years working in the Ministry, I come to understand better what Dumbledore faced. He may have made bad decisions, but the path he chose was a hard one to walk. Sometimes it is not easy to recognize the right decision, let alone make it. I want to recognize his lifelong effort of improving our world."

"I remember Fred," George said simply. His twin had suffered a severe head trauma during the Final Battle and had fallen into a coma. Six months after that, he had died. "Magic can't fix everything, so we should be careful to protect what matters most to us." Tears fell down his cheeks and he covered his face as his father pulled him tightly against his side.

"I want to remember Family," Arthur stated roughly. "So many were broken by the war, but so many new ones were formed. It's important to remember that we need each other and that we never stand alone."

"Let us remember Neville Longbottom and all those who are still missing or lost, so that we may welcome them home," Luna said happily.

Ginny stared at her candle for a long moment before speaking. "Ron," she finally choked out. She wished she could say more - tell everyone how much she loved him, about their childhood together, their fights and their close moments - but it was too much and she ended up only able to say his name.

"My son, Cedric, whose death brought awareness to the people," Amos Diggory offered solemnly.

"My sister, Leila, who fought with the Order and died." Belinda Diggory added her candle to the group.

Molly was the last to stand. "I want us all to remember the happiness we had with those we lost and the happiness they would wish us to continue. We are their legacy. Let us remember that."

The last candle floated above the table. Then as one they shot up into the air… up… higher… until their light became the first stars in the night sky, slowly to be joined by a thousand others.

**xXx**

_~ Monday, March 5th 1999 ~_

Monday morning dawned bright and clear. It was warmer than it had been all year. Hermione left her dorm room and smiled at her fellow students as they passed. Some classmates waved her over and she joined them at the foot of the stairs leading to the classroom building.

"Morning, Hermione. Did you study all weekend again?" Rosaline asked with a friendly smile.

"Of course," Hermione lied smoothly. She pointed her finger at the girl and wagged it at her. "Your grades are important, you know. And Professor Smidgen has an interesting view on Asian-American politics during the nineteenth century."

"Herm," Christopher groaned and pushed her playfully. "I haven't even had coffee yet!"

She laughed.

They stood there talking for another few minutes before heading up to their first class of the day. Hermione felt greatly relieved that her make-up had successfully hidden the dark circles under her eyes and her bulky sweater had concealed her weight loss. March was just not a good month for her. Worse, she suspected that she would get less than one hundred percent on the test today. She was already planning an extra credit assignment to make up for it. As she feared, she left the classroom certain she didn't score as high as she preferred.

Rosaline heard her sigh and gently touched her arm. "Hey, you okay?"

"Yeah. Are you ready for the bar exam?"

"No," the girl laughed, "but I'm taking it anyway."

"I hope I do well," Hermione muttered. Law was intricate and difficult enough to keep her busy, and she liked that she might actually help people one day.

"You know you will. Want to go get breakfast?"

"No, thank you. I have homework to get done before my next class."

Rosaline wasn't surprised by this answer. Hermione was in many of her classes and they lived in the same dorm, but the girl hardly ever accepted invitations to hang out. They probably wouldn't talk at all, except Hermione was always willing to help with homework or lead study groups.

"You need to balance work and fun. It's not healthy studying all the time," she observed.

Hermione smiled. "You're right. Maybe next time," she said cheerfully before tossing a wave and hurrying to the library.

The day passed slowly and Hermione only left her favorite table to go to class. Dusty, weighty tomes held her attention to the point where she didn't even notice the hours slipping by.

"Miss…?"

Hermione looked up. Her eyes were blurry from staring at pages for so long. Rubbing them, she answered, "Yes?"

"We're closing. Did you want me to put these books aside for tomorrow? They're reference books, so you can't check them out."

"I know," Hermione muttered irritably before sighing. "Sorry. No. Go ahead and put these up. Thank you."

The elderly woman nodded.

It really was dark. The days were beginning to get longer, but the sun still set early. Wrapping her coat more securely around her, Hermione set off for her dorm. Her steps echoed on the sidewalk. Leaves rustled in the trees, sounding like whispers. The eerie atmosphere had goosebumps erupting along her arms.

"Nothing's there. Don't be ridiculous," she whispered sternly to herself.

Nevertheless, when she heard the golf cart of campus security come up from behind her, she was relieved. She looked back to see two men, one heavy-set, the other thin, talking boisterously about some bet they had going.

"I'm telling ya, you're gonna lose. No way she'll put out on a first date."

"We'll see, won't we?"

"Your loss is my gain!"

Hermione stepped off the path to let them pass her.

A walkie-talkie beeped. The driver lifted it to his mouth, "This is Dursley."

Hermione's eyes went wide. Before she could even contemplate what she was going to do, her feet had her running after the cart and calling for it to stop. The thinner passenger jumped out. His hand rested on the taser at his hip.

"What is it, Miss? Some trouble?"

"No… I just thought I recognized… Are you Dudley Dursley?"

The beefy blond stared at her in confusion. "Yeah. We meet in a bar somewhere?"

"No…" She had no idea what she was doing. "I, um, knew your cousin."

Dudley's eyes narrowed to slits, but before she could back away or stutter out some kind of apology, his face softened into a smile.

"Harry, huh? Been a while since I thought about him. Hey, why don't we get a few drinks this weekend? You can catch me up."

"Well, I, uh, don't really…"

"Great! Which dorm are you in? I'll pick you up Saturday night at seven."

"Oh… um, Conrad…"

"I'll be there, Miss…?"

"Granger. Hermione Granger."

"Great," Dudley said again, his chubby face crinkling in a smile.

Before she could protest or really understand what just happened, the golf cart was speeding away.

**xXx**

_~ Tuesday, March 6th 1999 ~_

The next day Marissa came running into the house with a shriek of joy just as Draco and Severus were spelling the last streamer into place.

"It's so pretty!"

"Inside voice," Severus drawled warningly, but he did pat her head fondly. "You're a bit early."

"Sorry. She was just so excited." Sirius stepped into the sitting room with several wrapped boxes in his arms. "She woke up at six this morning, didn't you, magpie?"

"It's my birthday!" she answered with a twirl.

Draco winced at her shout. "Happy birthday." He bent down and picked her up for a hug.

She kissed his check. "Thank you, Draco. Do you think Angel will come this year?"

"I don't think so."

"Oh." Her face went slack with sadness for a moment before she shrugged it off. "We'll have fun anyways, won't we, Draco?"

"Of course, princess." He set her back on her feet and admired her dress. "You look very beautiful. The dark purple goes really well with your hair."

"Thanks! Auntie Tonks helped me pick it out."

Tonks stepped into the room carrying Teddy on her hip. Remus followed after her with yet more gifts. Marissa quickly ran to help him arrange them on the table.

"I'm so glad I wasn't there for that," Sirius said quietly to Draco. "It's hell getting her to stand still."

"I bet."

"Let's dance! I want to dance!" Marissa ran over to Severus and looked up at him with her big eyes. "There just has to be dancing if this is to be a real party. Please, Sev'rus?"

Severus stared back, seemingly unmoved. Then with a sigh, he called for Omi. "Can you fetch the radio, please?"

Marissa clapped with a happy cheer while Draco snorted at the older man for giving in.

Severus lifted his eyebrow in response. "Dancing is apparently a necessity."

"May I have this dance?" Sirius asked his adopted daughter once the music started to play.

"You can have the next one, Papa. First I'm going to dance with Draco!"

That said, she grabbed the blond's hand and pulled him over to where there was some space. Severus laughed. Draco thought _he_ was going soft!

"Teddy, no!"

The toddler laughed as he ripped one of the navy blue streamers down. Tonks hastily spelled it back up and glared at her husband for laughing at her. Teddy wiggled, trying to get free. With a sigh, she set him down. He immediately took off for Sirius who was snickering in the corner about something or other. She wondered if she should be worried.

"May I have this dance?"

Tonks smiled up into Remus's eyes as she accepted his hand.

Over in the corner that had Tonks so worried, Severus approached the prankster. "What, pray tell, are you doing?"

Sirius grinned in response. "I just thought I'd liven things up a bit."

With a dark glower, he whispered, "What did you do?"

"I spelled the gifts so that she'll make a different animal sound as she opens each one. Harmless. Really."

Severus remained skeptical, but his attention was distracted as Teddy tried to crawl between his legs and under his dress robes.

Sirius barked out a loud laugh. "He probably thinks it's a tent!"

"Make yourself useful for once, Black," he ordered harshly, trying to escape the giggling little boy.

"Fine." Sirius swooped in and hefted Teddy into his arms. "Whatcha doin, ya imp?"

"Playin," the boy answered innocently.

"Why don't we go play over there? Wanna dance?" He swept over toward the dancers, twirling Teddy through the air.

The boy laughed loudly, his arms outstretched as if he believed he was flying.

"It's your turn, Severus," Draco announced.

Marissa offered the Potions Master her hand.

"I'm afraid my knee won't allow me the pleasure," Severus answered smoothly.

"I'll go slow. Promise."

Backed into a verbal corner, Severus was left with no other recourse but to bow and accepted her small hand.

Smiling, Draco sat on the couch and just enjoyed the festive scene. Remus and Tonks joined him shortly. The werewolf was looking well, despite his condition. Grey streaked his brown hair, but his eyes were bright and his face was relatively unlined. Tonks had short yellow hair in sharp spikes, her eyes a happy blue.

"How are things?"

"Well," Draco answered her.

"Has Severus come up with a better potion for you?" Remus asked compassionately. Of anyone there, only he had any inkling just how hard it was for Draco.

"No, but I manage." Even though Remus could understand, Draco was not interested in talking about his condition or what he had to do to prevent the disease from taking over completely. "I hear Bill and Fleur are expecting their first child. Are they excited?"

"Oh, my, yes!" Tonks exclaimed brightly. "They're pretty sure the baby will be healthy like Teddy, too."

"That's good."

"Mummy," Teddy called as he ran over. "Dance with me!"

"I'd be delighted." She giggled as she bent over and let her son lead her off.

"Nice one," Remus remarked, knowing his son's request was his friend's doing.

"I thought so," Sirius returned with a grin.

The party continued with dancing and games. Everyone was relaxing and having a good time. Omi brought out the cake and everyone sung for the glowing birthday girl. Marissa had tears of joy in her eyes by the time they finished and took a deep breath to blow out all her candles. Sirius moved to help her cut it, but she insisted that she was old enough now to do it on her own.

"Who wants a big piece?" she called.

Her little hand held the large knife and she brought it down, not noticing her other hand was braced on the table for leverage just where she was cutting. She gasped as pain went up her arm. The knife fell messily to the carpet. Blood welled up and spilled down her hand. Tonks, Remus, and Sirius rushed forward. Severus moved, instead, toward Draco.

Draco had gone rigid. His pupils dilated out so much, they covered the iris. Small, delicate fangs pushed out from his upper gums. Only Severus's hand on his chest kept him from stepping toward his prey. 

The hunger Draco fought so hard to tame roared up from his gut. _Starving_ … He sidestepped, but the annoying brace against his chest moved with him. Baring his fangs, he hissed in warning.

"Go outside, Draco," Severus barked, voice hard and unyielding. "Now."

Draco almost couldn't do it. The smell of the hot, rich blood filled the room. It was so good. He could literally see himself picking up the deliciously small girl. She wouldn't be able to fight him. All that blood, it could be nurturing him, could _finally_ slack his thirst. 

A distant part of his mind told him he should be horrified at the idea of Marissa lying limp, dead, in his arms, but he couldn't feel it. All he felt was a singing joy at the thought of killing her. Thankfully, habit had him turning away. He allowed Severus to push him toward the front door. Draco could smell the blood from the hall. It hurt so much to move away. He was so empty…

Then the fresh air hit his face. Tears stung his eyes at the loss of the decadent scent. Why did he torment himself so? The blood would be so heavenly in his mouth, coating his stomach, warming him from the inside out… He was so tired of this futile struggle. Eventually, he would lose control. Why not now?

Gasping, Draco ran from the house, down the hill, and toward the town. He needed to relieve the pressure badly. He was starting to lose control. _Shadow,_ he told himself desperately. _Think of Shadow._

Severus returned to the group, his expression tight with worry.

"Will he be all right?" Sirius asked.

"Yes." Honestly, Severus couldn't deal with the alternative right now. "How is Marissa?"

"I healed her as best I could," Remus answered. "Do you have a pain-relieving potion?"

"Of course." Severus had Omi fetch it.

"Thank you," Marissa said miserably after she drank half a dose.

"Come on. Want to open presents?" Sirius coaxed.

"No."

"How about some cake?" Tonks offered.

"Cake!" Teddy agreed and clapped his hands.

"Is Draco mad at me?"

"No. He just needed fresh air," Severus reassured her, stroking a hand through her curls.

Marissa nodded and let herself feel better. Severus would never lie to her. "Okay. I'll have some cake."

They all sat down and had some. By the time they got to the presents, Marissa was back to being excited. She laughed with the others as she ‘moo’ed and ‘quack’ed as she opened each gift. Clothes, books, toys… She was a very lucky girl. A few hours later, when things were winding down, she went with her Papa upstairs. Sleepily, she kissed Shadow's cheek and whispered goodbye.

Sirius ruffled her hair and lifted her into his arms. "Did you have a good party?"

"Yes. Thank you."

"Don't thank me. Thank your host."

"Thank you, Sev'rus," she said obediently as they came even with him at the front door. "Tell Draco bye I love him."

"He loves you, as well," Severus answered.

She gave him a sleepy wave as Sirius carried her outside and Apparated away.

"Goodbye, Severus," Tonks said softly, Teddy out like a light in her arms.

Remus shook his hand. "Thanks for having us over."

"It was a pleasure. As long as we keep it to once a year."

Remus and Tonks laughed.

Severus sighed as he shut his door. It was time to get to work. He went from room to room very carefully casting an air purifying charm. It wouldn't do for even a hint of blood to remain. If Draco even once tasted blood in his condition, he'd lose his grip on humanity. There would be no turning back at that point.

**xXx**

_~ Wednesday, March 7th 1999 ~_

Shadow ran wildly through the forest. Roots and bushes grabbed at his feet, and every time he fell, his heart slammed even harder against his bruised ribs. _They're coming! Run, RUN!_

Terrified, he looked desperately behind him. He could hear them gaining. The masked men would catch him and drag him back to the graveyard! With a hoarse cry of pure terror, he scrambled back to his feet and flung himself forward.

Gasping sobs sounded loudly in his ears. _They'll hear! Shut up, shut up!_ Darkness tunneled in his vision from a lack of oxygen or perhaps too much of it. What remained of his clothes hung around him in tatters. Branches scrapped and scratched at his skin. The sting of pain spurred him on. _They'll hurt me; they'll kill me!_

He broke free into a tiny clearing. His legs wobbled and then gave out. Shivery exhaustion made his limbs limp. _No!_ He crawled forward, his eyes darting madly around. He needed shelter, a hiding place. Calls and jeers sounded behind him in the woods. _They're coming!_ He couldn't get up; he was too tired. _Run! Please!_

Something moved to the right. A flash of white. Shadow froze. Every muscle seized up, his lungs and heart locked in place. All the blood drained from his face only for his heart to whoosh back into frantic action when it wasn't a Death Eater but a bird that stepped clear of the bushes. Mind racing, he scrambled forward for some type of concealment. He was blind to what he was seeing.

The beautiful white peacock daintily stepped toward him. It's sharp beak opened and let out a harsh, coughing cry.

"D-d-rac-c-o?" he stuttered. He was crouched in the bushes, desperately trying to cover himself. The white peacock stood just outside his hiding place, head cocked. His heart began to beat at triple the pace. "God," he moaned. "Run! Get out of here! THEY'RE COMING!"

Draco didn't listen. Instead, he lifted his long tail and began to fan it out. The delicate neck arched, the head feather raising as the bird tilted his head coyly. Shadow could only stare in shock. The magnificent peacock flapped his wings and did a funny little hop-step, still focusing on Shadow, the tail feathers displayed enticingly.

"Draco…" Despite himself, Shadow felt his quivering body relax, the fear draining away. His heart and tears slowed. "But…"

Another hop-step forward and the peacock was within touching distance. As if in a dream, Shadow reached forward and traced a finger down that silky neck. The bird preened, the tail display bobbing happily. Trembling, Shadow brought his hand back to his chest, new tears choking his raw throat.

"They mate for life, you know."

His head lifted to stare at his father standing next to his huddled form, his back resting against a tree.

Severus calmly crouched down next to him, his emotions a tranquil void that soothed Shadow's senses. The dark-eyes held his own for a moment before flicking back toward the gorgeous bird. "Even if you die, he will never find another mate. You are his one and only."

Shadow snickered weakly, amused that his father was saying such sappy stuff.

"Well, it's true," the stoic Potions Master defended himself. "Besides, weren't you the one who told me you'd rather live?"

He was confused for a moment, but when he turned to ask Draco, he realized Draco wasn't with him. It was just Severus and him lost in the tunnels under the bank.

"I can't believe we're talking about stuff now." He laughed and covered his face. "We're hiding from goblins, miles under the earth. We may not even escape and we're sitting here in the dark having a therapy session."

"We will be here awhile until the alarm decreases. It would be better to talk to speed time," Severus gently returned.

Shadow hesitated but then gave in to the inevitable. "Sometimes I dream of what would make Seraphim happy. Having everyone he cared about safe and together in one place, a place where no one else could come. Then I see the people I care about there, too. I can understand where he's coming from. I mean, it would be comforting to know everyone I loved was safe, but I still can't imagine living like that. Trapped in one house, never to leave, no one else allowed to leave either."

He sighed and stared down at his hands, one of them wrapped from wrist to fingers in gauze, underneath was a painful burn. "I know it would protect me from getting hurt, but it would also keep me from really living life. I want to live my life, not hide away from it, even though it can be scary and it can hurt me. Because, otherwise, I'd just be imprisoning myself… God, I want to _live_ , really live."

The sheer emotion cutting through him, shocked Shadow. Yes, he remembered now… remembered everything… And it hurt, especially lately, but Shadow remembered good times, too. Good times laughing with Neville. 

_Oh, Nev, I'm so sorry._

His semi-uncles who stood with him through so much. 

_Remus, Sirius!_

He remembered plotting with the Slytherins, admiring their strength to face adversity in silence, never giving up their watchful post, waiting for the enemy to reveal a weakness. 

_Miles, Rogan, Lillian!_

And of course there was Severus and Draco…

  _Draco!_  

He longed to return to them all.

He was done being stuck here, wherever here was, at the mercy of whatever memory wanted to suck him in. Dursleys, Death Eaters, his multiple personas all clamoring to be heard. Well, he wanted out. He wanted to be free. These horrible nightmares were almost unbearable the first time. He didn't want to live them over and over.

_They're in the past! It's over! I want to live,_

“… really live…"

**Chapter end.**


	2. Ashes, Ashes, We All Fall Down

**Ashes, Ashes, We All Fall Down**

_~ Wednesday, March 7th 1999 ~_

Draco cracked open exhausted eyes. He was in his bed back at the house. The memories of the night before were a blur. He had no idea how he got home, but from the smell of him he'd been able to retain the last bit of his humanity. He reeked of sex, not blood. That knowledge would have made him feel relief just a few months ago, but he was reaching the end of his strength. All he felt was numb.

With heavy limbs still weighed down by the last of the day, he dragged his sorry self into the shower. Methodically, he scrubbed every inch until all he could smell was clean soap. He wanted to keep going despite that. He wanted to scrub layers of skin away, but he feared what would happen if he spilled even his own blood.

By the time he was finished with his shower, the sun had set fully. Energy returned to him. He dressed quickly, anxious to return to his love's side. Shadow was the only thing that touched his rapidly deadening heart. When he pushed the door open, he found Severus asleep in the chair beside the bed. His hair had grown longer, reaching his shoulders. It was less oily than usual as he wasn’t constantly standing over a cauldron anymore. He had dark circles under his eyes and his skin was as pale as ever. He was thin from having missed too many meals and stress. He looked a decade older than his thirty-eight years.

Draco gently touched his shoulder to wake him and winced when Severus's neck popped loudly. "Bad day?"

Severus rubbed his eyes in clear exhaustion. "He was restless after lunch, but then he fell still. It's been so long since he lay so quietly. Not since I stopped giving him a calming potion. I was concerned it signified a change for the worse."

"And?"

"His vitals are the same as always."

Relief washed over both their expressions.

"Rest. I'll watch him," Draco offered.

The older man did as suggested. He was far too tired for anything else. He hadn't slept a wink last night, worried about Draco and what kind of condition he'd return in, and then with Shadow… He shook himself and moved stiffly to the door, limping heavily. "Goodnight."

Draco didn't reply. His attention was now solely focused on his love. He'd been waiting for Shadow to awaken for three years now. He'd made Shadow the symbol of his humanity; he was what Draco clung to. Smiling, the blond went to the bookcase and pulled out the thick leather tome he'd been reading: The Magic Mountain by Thomas Mann. It was their thirty-seventh novel.

"Where were we?" The pages crackled as he turned to the ribbon marking his place. "Ah, page 328, Walpurgis Night… _Toward the end of the meal the ceiling light went out, and only the colorful twilight of the paper lanterns illumined the room, making of the scene an Italian night, and setting the crown upon the mood of the evening. Settembrini passed over a paper to Hans Castorp's table, by the hand of Marusja, who sat nearest him, with a green tissue-paper jockery cap on her head; on it he had written with a pencil:_

_But mind, the mountain's magic-mad tonight,_

_And if you choose a will-o'-the-whisp to light_

_Your path, take care, 'twill lead you all astray._ "

"…really live…"

Draco's voice trailed off as he glanced over at his love. There had been so many nights where he thought he heard something, saw something, to indicate Shadow was with him. Still, he paused upon hearing the imagined whispered words, ever hopeful. When a few seconds passed and there was no change, his eyes dropped again to the open book in his lap. He was about to continue when the undeniable sound of movement drew his eyes up again. Setting the book aside, he stood.

"Bad dreams again, love?" Draco asked gently, reaching forward to brush aside dark curls.

He about had a heart attack when those eyelids fluttered. His heart leapt into his throat and he stood there, not daring to breathe, or blink, or move in any way as Shadow's brow crinkled.

Light as a butterfly wing, the thick black lashes parted briefly before shutting on a soft groan.

Draco jumped into action. He dimmed the light in the room and fell to his knees, his hand grasping his love’s. "Shadow? Can you hear me? Wake up for me, please. I need to see you. Come on, open those eyes."

Those glorious two-colored orbs obediently flicked open, blinking slowly.

"Shadow…" Draco rasped emotionally.

The dazed eyes shifted to the side and actually focused for the first time in years. "Dra…co…" A small smile brushed Shadow's full lips.

"I'm here," he promised. "Oh Merlin… You're awake." Tears streaked down his cheeks. "You're _awake_."

"Drac…o… Want… to… li-" A dry raspy cough interrupted the weak words.

Draco scrambled for the water pitcher and quickly filled a glass. He sat on the bed and carefully helped Shadow to sit up, bracing the skinny back with his arm. Shadow was so weak that he couldn't lift his arms let alone the water to his lips, so, with Shadow's head resting on his shoulder, Draco carefully helped him drink.

"Slow down. That's it. You're doing so good."

Shadow drank greedily until the glass was empty. He smiled tiredly as he felt Draco begin to rub his stomach, soothing the cramps drinking had caused. The pain was nothing compared to what Shadow was used to. As badly as his body felt now, it felt so good to be with Draco again. _So good._ "Draco…"

"Yes, love?" Draco asked softly, still rubbing slow circles.

"You were there… your peacock… I remembered…"

"I will always be there for you," Draco murmured into the ringlets under his cheek. He had no idea what his love was talking about, but he knew that much for certain. "I love you. I've been waiting so long to tell you. I love you, Shadow."

Shadow laughed softly, his eyes closing as warmth spread through his chest. "I know. Peacocks mate for life. White ones have found their mate. Never find another."

Draco's hand stilled as he absorbed that information. "How long have you known that?"

"Long time. But it's okay. I love you, too… Serpentine…"

"Shadow?" Draco gently lay him down so he could look into his face. He was sleeping once more. "Hey, stay with me."

"Not goin'… ne-where… Jus' tired…"

Draco bit his lip and held on tightly to Shadow's hand as the brunet's breathing deepened into sleep. It took him several minutes to pull himself together, but he still couldn't bring himself to let go. With his left hand, he grabbed his wand and cast a sloppy Patronus messenger in Severus's direction.

The Potions Master came running in wearing only his sleeping robe, his hair mussed. "What is it? What's wrong?"

Draco looked up at him with luminous grey eyes. "He woke up."

Severus blinked, not taking in the words for a moment. He rushed forward and cast diagnostic spells at his son in rapid succession. Almost instantly, the results informed him that Shadow was sleeping normally. He was no longer in a coma. Severus's legs threatened to give out and his lips trembled traitorously. He brought his hand up in front of his mouth to hide it.

"What…" He cleared his suddenly tight throat. "What did he say?"

Draco couldn't articulate at the moment. Instead, he looked up and held the dark-eyed gaze. He offered his memory to the desperate man. Had Severus been anyone else, he would never have done it. It was a private, cherished memory already.

Severus staggered and sat heavily in the chair Draco had abandoned. "Merlin… He's awake…"

Draco laughed, voice thick with tears. "I said the same thing."

"Merlin…" Severus had to cover his eyes as he began to cry. His son… His son was returned to him! A laugh bubbled its way up from his stomach.

"…Dad…"

Severus was on his feet and beside the bed, leaning over his son, in an instant. "I'm here. I'm right here, Shadow."

"Miss you… Dad…"

Severus bit his lip hard before answering thickly, "I miss you, too."

Shadow sighed, content, before blinking open sleepy eyes. "Tired…"

"Your body needs care. You've been sleeping for a long time."

"Sleeping?… Felt so real…"

"Can you sit up and eat for me? You need to gain back your strength. I know it's hard, but if you want to get better, you have to work at it," Severus told him gently.

"Want… to live…"

"Good," Severus praised and kissed his forehead. "Omi."

"Yes, Master?" the elf responded instantly. He'd been watching excitedly from the doorway.

"I need broth quickly. Put in a half dose of nutrient potion."

"Yes, Master!"

Draco lifted Shadow again and braced him with an arm across his back to keep him sitting up. "We'll go slow. Just take it easy," the blond reassured.

"You got me," Shadow responded with a smile.

"Yeah. I got you." Draco sat and pulled Shadow in toward his side, half-hugging him. "And I'm never letting go."

"Good." Shadow tilted his head to rest on the strong shoulder behind him. His eyes sought out his father. "Remember everything." Just thinking about it made his heart kick up a bit with fear. He remembered being Seraphim, Demon, and… Boy.

"Shhh." Severus gently grasped his son's chin, forcing the dilating eyes to meet his own. "Don't think of anything right now. Just us. Just this moment. You are safe. Trust me. Trust us. We've got you. All you need to do is lay back and let us do all the work."

Shadow was too tired and sick to sustain his fear. The sound of his father's voice, his steady gaze, the warmth of Draco all around him - it made him relax. He could trust these two. However, the fear had tightened his muscles and his legs spasmed painfully. He whimpered and tried to ride it out, but the pain kept rising, bringing back his anxiety.

Severus quickly began to massage the weakened muscles with a topical muscle relaxant that he kept in the bedside drawer, but he could see he wasn't helping enough. Shadow had begun to whimper, his head tossing. The spasms took over his back and stomach as he tensed further. He was sobbing now, begging for it to stop, for the punishment to end.

"Omi! A pain-reliever! Quickly!"

Omi popped in with the bottle and almost tripped in his anxiousness.

Severus summoned it and forced Shadow's mouth open. He was terrified the pain would send the teen fleeing back into a coma. He waited with baited breath as Draco rocked his fragile son and whispered non-stop in his ear. Severus could only hope Draco would get through to him.

"It's over. You're fine. We're here," Draco soothed, cradling Shadow's head on his shoulder.

"…tired…" Shadow whispered on an exhale.

Draco laid down on the bed, pulling Shadow into his side once more. "Sleep. You can eat after you rest for a little while."

Severus ran a diagnostic the second Shadow's breathing evened out. "He's just sleeping."

Draco nodded and continued to run his hand rhythmically up and down the smaller teen's back.

Staring almost hungrily at his son, Severus shifted his weight back toward the door. "I'm going to get things ready for when he wakes again. Message me when he does."

Again the blond nodded, his attention riveted on his charge.

**xXxXxXx**

_~ Thursday, March 8th 1999 ~_

Luna skipped into the Great Hall with a delighted laugh. She spun, her robes twirling around her slender legs, her hair waving behind her like a banner. "The Fallen Angel has returned to the Exiled Prince! Three cheers for the beginning of a new day!"

Dozens of sleepy eyes stared blankly back at her. She giggled. Such sweet children. They'd understand soon enough. With a shrug, she skipped toward the Gryffindor table and kissed Ginny's cheek.

"You're in a mood this morning," the redhead snorted. "Did you get into the coffee again?"

"The Lost will return soon, Gin. Are you ready?" Luna whispered in her ear.

Ginny stared as understanding dawned. "When?" Her knuckles turned white around the fork she held.

"That won't do. You have to be ready, not angry."

Ginny grabbed her wrist. "When, Luna," she said lowly, her eyes dark.

The blonde shook her head and carefully freed her wrist. Ginny glared but let her go.

The Ravenclaws studiously ignored Luna as she sat among them. She laughed again. Boy, were they going to be surprised! Well, they couldn't say she hadn’t told them. It wasn't her fault they didn't listen. Excitement bubbled under her skin. She couldn't sit still! After only a few bites, she got up and danced her way out of the Hall.

"Lovegood, wait."

She turned and smiled brightly up at the handsome Seventh-year Slytherin. He had auburn hair and muddy green eyes. “Yes?"

"You were talking about Draco, weren't you?" Rogan asked her. "He's the exiled prince?"

"Well, I guess there are two Princes, one by blood, the other by bearing…"

"Lovegood," he growled in frustration.

"Don't worry." She gently placed her palm over his chest. "It's exactly what you're hoping for."

“Rogan?" Miles limped around the corner, leaning on Lillian's arm. His disease was taking its toll. His back bowed forward, his legs were twisted from being broken so many times, and his left hand was almost completely useless, his finger joints having fused together. His shrewd brown eyes took in the Luna’s obvious joy and Rogan’s one of reluctant hope. He smiled. "So she _was_ talking about Shadow and Draco, then?"

“Are they coming back in time for our wedding?" Lillian asked. Her pixie bob had grown out to her shoulders, her black hair glossy and wavy and beautiful.

"Ask Loony," Rogan responded with a snort as he moved to help support Miles.

Luna gave a musical little hum before waving and skipping off down the corridor. This was going to be so much fun; she could hardly wait!

The two boys watched her go, baffled looks on their faces. Their eyes met and they gave minute shrugs. They were Slytherins. They could be patient.

**xXxXxXx**

_~ Friday, March 9th 1999 ~_

Shadow's muscles had grown so weak that he could only churn them through the bath with no more strength than a baby. The warm water had potions to help his muscles relax and gain strength more quickly. It tingled against his skin. Severus sat behind him, his strong fingers massaging his arms while murmuring encouragement into his ears. Draco crouched before him, working his legs. Shadow pushed against his hands like he were riding a bicycle.

"Harder. There you go. That's it."

They'd been in the bath doing different exercises for almost an hour. Shadow was drenched with sweat. He didn't want to do this anymore. Tears fell down his cheeks.

"You'll be better soon. You're already doing better," Severus told him proudly. "You're doing so good."

"Hurts," Shadow croaked out, his breathing labored. "No more."

Draco looked over at Severus with tormented eyes. He didn't want to hurt his love, but he knew this was necessary to Shadow recovering.

"All right," Severus relented. "Let's get you out and tucked into bed. You can eat something and take a nap."

Draco moved forward and lifted Shadow into his arms bridal style. Shadow pressed his face into Draco’s shoulder to hide his tears of frustration and pain. With practiced movements, Severus and Draco had Shadow dried and in his pajamas without requiring the weakened teen to help. They'd been taking care of his unconscious body for years now.

Shadow was too exhausted to feel embarrassment, though he knew he'd feel it later. He grimaced. He was getting so sick of bitter soup. No matter what broth Omi cooked, the nutrient potion made them all taste sour. He made a face but didn't voice his complaint as Draco fed him with steadfast patience. Shadow could hardly meet his eyes. He felt so _pathetic_.

"I'm tired," he said when he couldn't take it anymore. He weakly pushed the bowl away and laid down on his side, closing his eyes tightly.

Draco said nothing to this. He didn't need empathy to know that Shadow was reaching his emotional breaking point. He slid into bed behind his love and wrapped his arm around his waist, pulling Shadow against his chest. He smiled when Shadow didn't pull away.

Shadow woke a couple of hours later. It was day time now, early morning sunlight flooded the room. He looked to the side and saw Draco deeply asleep, his chest slowly rising and falling. He frowned. Yesterday the blond had slept all day as well. He had brushed it off as Draco being tired, but two days in a row?

Severus came in with another bowl of soup. The man smiled as he set up the lap tray and pulled up a chair. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm not hungry!" Shadow snapped and tried to cross his arms, but they were too sore of him to maintain it more than a few seconds. He let them fall limp. "Why is Draco sleeping?"

"He's tired. We had a hard week." Severus lifted the spoon. "You need to eat. You are far too underweight. You need to keep up your strength."

"I don't want it," he said again. His body hurt all over. He was sick of feeling weak! Of being treated like a baby! "I hate that fucking soup!"

Severus met his son's blazing eyes. "I was under the impression you wished to get well."

"It's too hard!" Shadow cried, his anger swinging rapidly into despair. "I can't do it!"

"You can because you are not alone. We're going to do this with you." He lifted the spoon again.

Shadow ate silently, his eyes downcast. He wasn't placated. Emotions churned in his chest. His lips tightened with effort at he fought to keep them in check.

"You ready?" Severus asked, but he didn't wait for an answer before he lifted his son into his arms and carried him from the room.

Shadow wrapped his arms around Severus's neck to keep his balance as his father limped down the hall to the dueling room. Inside there was equipment that would help him regain his strength. Severus, of course, brought him to the one he hated most. The two parallel bars stood at waist height. He was placed on his feet at one end and he quickly gripped the bars to keep his legs from buckling under his own weight.

"Let's see if you can get to the other end today."

Shadow's arms and legs trembled with effort. Sweat was already beading at his forehead. "I can't!"

"You can. Try."

"I can't!" Shadow screamed again. He knew if he moved either a hand or a foot to take a step, he would collapse.

"You made it halfway yesterday. I know you can do it," Severus repeated, unmovable.

"I'm tired!"

"Try! We've worked so hard to keep you alive. Don't throw that away. You need to put forth some effort. We cannot do it for you."

_So pathetic! So weak!_ Shadow bit his lip as tears spilled over his cheeks. God! He was always crying! He wanted Draco. Draco wouldn't make him do this.

"Try, Shadow. You can do this."

A shaky foot slid forward. One hand moved, then the second. He dragged his other leg forward. It hurt! It was too hard. "… Can't…" he gasped.

"Again. Come on. Just a few more steps."

Sweating, crying, Shadow forced his body along the bars. Halfway to his father, his right arm gave out. He cried out in pain as he caught the bar hard under his arm before sliding to the floor. Severus was there instantly, offering him a pain potion and rubbing a topical potion into his spasming muscles.

"Hate you," Shadow gasped. His fingers curled into a fist as he sobbed.

"I know."

Severus finished rubbing the strengthener into Shadow's arms and legs. He lifted him off the floor, bringing him to a specially designed rocking chair. It resisted being pushed and required Shadow to use both legs to get it to go backward. He also handed the flushed teen a round ball. Severus sat in front of his son and they passed it back and forth.

Shadow would press down with his feet as hard as he could and he’d rock back, taking the ball from Severus. Then he’d release his legs and rock forward, passing the ball back to Severus. Thirty minutes later, Shadow literally couldn't lift the ball anymore. By this point, he was so exhausted that he fell asleep in the chair.

Severus let Shadow rest for a minute, tears gathering in his eyes. He leaned his head back and sighed, his arms hanging limp at his sides. He wished he could take this from his son. If he could bear the pain for him, he would do so gladly. It was infuriating that recovering should be a burden just as heavy as the many ordeals Shadow had overcome.

_Please let him make it through this. Don't let this break him,_ he begged. "Omi!"

The elf appeared, wringing his hands in great distress. "Yes, Master?"

"Get the bath ready and bring me another bowl of soup in an hour."

"Yes, sir!" Omi popped away.

Carefully, Severus lifted Shadow so that the teen would continue to sleep and carried him to the bathroom.

**xXxXxXx**

_~ Saturday, March 10th 1999 ~_

Hermione stared into her mirror once more. She wore black tights, ankle-high boots, a red skirt, white sweater, and a black scarf. Her hair was braided down her back. Pushing her brown-framed glasses up her nose, she grabbed her purse and left the room. She had no idea what the night would hold for her or what to expect from Dursley.

She'd talked herself out of going a hundred times that week, but in the end she was curious and, besides, Dursley knew where she lived. She couldn't expect to avoid him forever now that she knew he worked on campus. She'd much rather get this over with than have him jump out at her unexpectedly. Still, she half-hoped he wouldn't show up.

Nothing is that easy, of course. Dursley was standing on the sidewalk at her dorm's entrance. He wore a light blue button down over his bulky girth. The blue cotton vest and black slacks altered her that he was taking this date seriously. His light blond hair was even gelled into attractive spikes. Hermione swallowed, her steps slowing, but then she squared her shoulders and stepped outside.

"Ah. I was afraid you forgot," Dudley said cheerfully and held out his hand to her to help her down the last few steps.

Hermione avoided the hand. "I am rather busy. I have a test on Monday."

"Good thing it's only Saturday night," Dudley returned and led her toward the parking lot.

"What's this about?" she asked evenly, following him.

"Can't a guy ask a pretty girl out to dinner anymore?" His blue eyes twinkled at her. "It's been so long since I heard about my cousin. It's only right that I know what's happening to my family."

Hermione felt sadness wash through her. The world thought Harry Potter was dead and, in a way, he truly was. She did not relish being the one to tell Dudley that his cousin was dead.

They arrived at a small Honda. Dudley opened her door and she got into the car still thinking about the bad news she had to relay. Coming around to the driver's side, Dudley started the car. He smiled over at her and Hermione smiled weakly back. The night was going to be a horrible one, she could tell.

"How long have you worked on campus?" she asked to distract them both.

"Since last summer. I worked security at a bank for a while, but this job pays better. Plus, one of my best mates works here in the kitchen."

"Oh."

"How long have you been goin' here, Hermione?"

"Almost five semesters. I graduate this December."

Dudley smiled brightly. “Wow! You must be smart as a whip! That’s half the time as normal, ain’t it? Congratulations.”

"Uh, thank you." Hermione fidgeted with her skirt. Dudley wasn't anything like she imagined from the stories Harry had told her. She didn't know what to think or how to act.

They rode on in silence for several minutes until Hermione lifted her eyes and looked around. They were leaving the small town. They had passed the main street where most of the restaurants were. An uneasy feeling stole into her stomach as she glanced over at her date. He caught her look and smiled at her again.

"So how'd you know Harry? Go to his school, did you?"

"Oh, uh, yeah, but I, um… I haven't been back in years. To, ah, that world." She was rambling, not sure how to explain it to a Muggle. How much did he know?

"That's good."

She frowned at him. "It is?"

"Yeah. That you realized how much better it is to be normal." He winked. "I'm glad or I wouldn't have met you."

"Oh…"

"So you used to be mates?"

Hermione looked out her window as memories swirled in her mind. "Yeah. We used to be really good friends. Ron, Harry, and I… We were once really good friends," she repeated softly.

"Good."

Dudley's charming smile faded and his blue eyes turned ice cold. He slammed on the accelerator and jerked the wheel to the side. The car flew off the road and raced toward a tree. There was a loud crash. Glass shattered. His seatbelt pressed on his chest as his head whipped forward.

Dazed, Dudley sat there for a moment before turning to see what happened to the freak. Not having worn her seatbelt, her head had smashed into the windshield, rendering her unconscious. He pried himself from the totaled car and made his way to her side. It took some effort, but he got the door open and dragged the limp girl out.

It seemed dramatic, maybe, but he knew what magic could do. He didn’t stand a chance. The only way he could get to her was if he managed to take her completely by surprise. He dragged her over to the bushes where he'd hid his motorcycle. It took some maneuvering, and he was drenched with sweat and out of breath before he was done, but he got her draped in front of the seat without her feet or hands dangling. He started the engine and sped off down the road.

**xXx**

Draco woke instantly. Dread coiled around his gut as his hunger made itself known. This would make the third night he hadn't gone out. Having sex with countless faceless people had been bad enough when his love had been in a coma, but with Shadow awake and aware it was going to be impossible.

"You're awake."

He turned his head to see Severus sitting in the chair by the bed. His exhausted expression didn't bode well. "Bad day?"

"He is growing more and more discouraged. Not to mention he has a fever. He had a flashback before I got him to take some Dreamless Sleep." Severus ran a hand through his hair, at wit's end. "I wanted to wait until he was more stable, but I think it's time we called in Lupin. He is a better healer than I, and he is familiar with Shadow's medical history. We've put it off for long enough."

"Telling Lupin will have Black and everyone else here. He can't be crowded," Draco argued as he sat up, shielding Shadow with his body.

"We won't let that happen," Severus returned firmly, holding that glowing grey gaze. "Watch him. I'll fetch the wolf."

Draco nodded reluctantly. He turned to examine his love. Shadow didn't look well. He was pale and flushed at the same time. His skin was hot and dry when Draco brushed his forehead with the back of his knuckles. He reached for the damp rag sitting half in a shallow bowl of cool water and gently bathed Shadow's overheated face.

Shadow's eyes fluttered open. He smiled at seeing the blond hovering over him, but then he frowned. "Nooooo," he groaned. "No more. Please."

"Shhh. Just rest. We're not going to exercise right now."

Shadow eyed him suspiciously before relaxing. Draco wouldn't lie to him. "Thirsty," he whispered and instantly he had water at his lips. He drank gratefully until the glass was empty.

"How are you feeling?” Draco asked softly when he was done.

Shadow smiled wryly. "Like crap."

"I'm sorry," Draco murmured, bathing his face once more. "Is there anything I can do?"

"Kiss me," Shadow demanded suddenly.

Draco's eyes sharpened predatorily. His body moved before his mind caught up with him and then it was too late. His mouth was on his love's. The taste of him… the feel of those lips matching his passion… the sound of their heavy breathing… Draco's hunger roared into a bonfire. He stabbed his tongue forward roughly.

Shadow moaned in ecstasy and kissed back, starving for touch that didn't hurt, almost desperate for it. He sucked hard on the tongue invading his mouth, using his own to press back. It felt so good. His mind was fogged with fever and potion. It made worry and fear far away and allowed him to enjoy the sensual moment, his body hardening in all the right places. Draco devoured his mouth, sending sparks shooting down his nerves.

Draco felt his fangs descend. He flung himself away from the bed, their mouths parting with a wet sound that almost broke his resolve. He stood shaking with his effort at self-control.

"Draco…" Shadow panted, head turning to track his lover. "What's wrong? Feels good."

"You need to rest," Draco bit out, trying to find the strength to leave the room, but he was frozen in place. He wanted to taste his love's blood so badly… He _knew_ it would be better than anything he'd ever known.

Shadow studied him. Draco's white-blond hair had fallen free from behind his ears and framed his pale face. Two red circles of color had appeared high on his hollowed out cheeks and his eyes shimmered strangely. It looked like he was the one with the fever and like he'd lost too much weight too quickly.

"I'm not the only one. Are you okay?" It was so hard to focus, but his worry over Draco cleared his head a bit. "What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing, I'll be right back." Draco used the fear of being discovered by Shadow to get his feet moving toward the door.

Draco didn't stop until he reached the potions lab and the large cabinet standing in the corner. He opened it and grabbed a potion from the top shelf. It was blood red, smelled like sulfur, and was no thicker than water. He downed the horrid thing in one go. His bloodlust transmuted into plain lust. He groaned. The glass vial slipped from his fingers and shattered on the floor. Almost blind with need, he groped for his pants and quickly spat into his palm.

_~ Saturday, March 10th 1999 ~_

Remus chuckled as Teddy carefully scrapped his peas onto the floor where their new puppy, Ander, could lick them up.

"What?" Tonks asked, turning from Marissa who had conveniently gotten her attention by asking if they could go to the park tomorrow.

Teddy smiled innocently at his mother, making his eyes baby blue. She smiled at him and ruffled his curly brown hair. This made Remus's chuckle turn into a full blown laugh.

Sirius wrinkled his nose as Tonks grew more suspicious and noticed the puppy's actions. "Turning on your own son, Moony." He shook his head with mock sadness. "How terrible."

"No dessert for you, young man," Tonks scolded her little boy.

Teddy stuck his tongue out.

"I get dessert, don't I, Papa?" Marissa asked sweetly, flipping her long hair off her shoulder. Her amber eyes stared up at him expectantly.

"Course, darling. Good behavior is always rewarded," Sirius answered with a sniff. "Jinks!"

An elf appeared with a bow. "Yes, Master?"

"Fetch our dessert, if you would."

"Yes, Master."

"I'll take Teddy up for his bath." Remus smiled at his wife when she shot him a relieved look. She fought a hard daily battle trying to discipline the kids when Sirius constantly spoiled them.

Teddy looked about to cry, but it turned into giggles when Remus nuzzled his neck. The two year old babbled about random things as they climbed the stairs toward the big bathroom. Ten minutes later, Teddy sat in warm water and bubbles, making noises as he played with his toy boats. Appropriately, his hair was dark green and his skin was blue.

Remus laughed. "Turning into a merman, huh? We'll have to call you Fishy instead of Teddy."

The boy laughed and splashed his father. "Bath with me!"

"Are you saying I'm dirty?" Remus asked with an arched brow.

"Dirty! Need bath with Teddy!" The toddler stood with surprising quickness and latched onto his father's neck, almost succeeding in pulling him in.

"Hey! You're a sneaky little bugger. Definitely too much time with Uncle Sirius." Remus carefully saved his neck and began soaping Teddy's hair.

"No fun, Daddy," Teddy pouted, little arms crossed.

Remus was about to answer when a pop sounded behind him.

"Sir, there is a guest here to see you. He is waiting in the parlor."

"Thank you, Jinks. I'll be right there."

Tonks slipped into the bathroom and kissed him as he stood. "It's Severus. Sirius is with him. Marissa is up in her room getting ready for bed." She cast a drying charm before smoothing his grey-streaked hair out of his face.

Remus nodded tightly. This was the first time Severus had been to Grimmauld Place since Shadow had fallen into a coma. Usually the man summoned them if he needed to speak to them. Stomach tight with tension, he hurried downstairs. He found Sirius scowling deeply at Severus who stood calmly by the fireplace.

"He's here. Now can you bother yourself to tell us why you've come so late?" Sirius barked.

Remus placed a steadying hand on his shoulder. "Yes, Severus. Is something wrong?"

Before answering, Severus cast several spells to make sure no one could enter the room and to prevent spying. His dark eyes pinned the other two into stillness. "Shadow has awakened."

Sirius staggered. "What? Really? How? When?" But he didn't wait for answers. He was already moving toward the door, practically trembling with excitement. It didn't open thanks to Severus's spells. "Hey! Let me out!"

"Not until you understand the situation," Severus answered with a disgusted sneer.

"How is his condition? Do you need assistance with his healing?" Remus asked worriedly. He knew his cub would be in for a hard recovery. His body had deteriorated to dangerous levels.

"He woke Wednesday…"

"Wednesday!" Rage coated Sirius's vision red. "And you didn't tell us immediately? What in the hell is wrong with you!”

Remus again blocked Sirius from attacking the other man. "Sirius, stop! Will you calm down and listen! You're acting like a child!"

Sirius was so shocked at his friend's tone, he did come to a stop. He stared as if he'd never seen Remus before.

"How is he mentally?" Remus asked, taking advantage of Sirius's silence.

Severus turned to face the fire. "He is very well considering he has completely merged with all his alters, but I fear he is not stable. We've been helping him exercise and using restorative relaxants in his bath water, but still he is in pain. I believe the pain helps ground him, distracts from his mental state, but he has had several nightmares and a few panic attacks despite this. I suspect that having people around whom he doesn't trust fully will distress him in his weakened state. That is why I have not informed you of his condition sooner. I reasoned it would be better not to know, than to know and not be able to see him."

"He trusts us, Snape!" Sirius snarled, hands fisting at his sides. "How dare you imply otherwise."

"Sirius, Shadow trusts us but not as much as he trusts his father and Draco. It isn't a good idea to upset him while his physical condition is still so shaky," Remus explained patiently. "His body must be under a lot of stress. Organ failure and illness are very high risks. He could die without very careful handling."

Sirius gasped, his anger forgotten. "Die? What? But he's awake…" He trailed off as he took in the solemn expression of both Remus and Severus.

"That is why I have come, Lupin. Shadow has caught some illness that I am unable to diagnosis with my current level of knowledge. He has a fever that is resistant to fever-reducers."

"I will come, of course," Remus answered immediately. "Let me go get my bag."

Severus nodded gratefully and ended the spell barricading the door.

"I'm coming, too!" Sirius immediately announced.

Remus paused, but Severus waved him on. Severus faced Black with a glare. "Did you not hear us? Shadow is in critical condition. He must be handled with care or we will lose him for good this time."

"I'll be calm. If he get's upset, I'll leave," Sirius insisted. "You aren't even sure our presence will distress him."

"Perhaps it is not certain that it will cause Shadow harm, but why risk it when there is no benefit to your presence anyway?" Severus responded with cold practicality.

"It might help him to know he's cared for and we love him," Sirius countered. His blue eyes hardened as he gazed at Snape. "I'm going unless you render me unable."

"Do not tempt me," Severus sneered.

Sirius was saved by the return of Remus. "Shall we go?" the werewolf asked carefully, aware of the tension in the room.

Severus stalked forward until he stood inches away from Sirius. "If he shows the least amount of stress and you do not leave, I will not hesitate to take you up on your offer. Are we clear?"

"Very." Sirius had no illusions that whatever Severus used to incapacitate him would be painless. He vowed to himself that he wouldn't let it come to that.

"I will have the same promise from you, Lupin. If he becomes distressed…"

"I will leave, of course," Remus answered easily.

"Then let us go." Severus swept past both men with deadly grace despite his pronounced limp.

Sirius rolled his eyes while Remus smiled, but both of them were too distracted to really engage in banter. Shadow was awake! It was the day they'd been awaiting for years.

They followed Severus outside and Apparated within seconds of each other a half-mile down the road from Snape's house. It was as close as the wards allowed them to go. The ten minute walk seemed to take hours before they finally stepped inside the outwardly rundown home.

Remus sniffed the air delicately. It usually smelled of Draco and Severus, but now Shadow's scent again filled the air as well. He smiled happily, but his joy was lessened as he scented the pain and illness mixed with the scent of his cub. He and Sirius practically stepped on Severus's heels as he led them upstairs. The three men came to a shocked stop as soon as they reached the second floor.

Shadow lay on the floor of the hallway, sweat-soaked and panting. As they watched, he struggled to crawl forwards. His arms trembled violently, but he was obviously determined. Severus rushed over. His eyes widened as he touched his son's shoulder. The heat was incredible. The fever had obviously gotten worse.

"It's okay. I'm here," Severus soothed as he carefully turned Shadow so that he was sitting, leaning against his chest.

"Draco…" The name was a worried plea.

Severus paled and quickly cast a spell to determine if Shadow's skin had been broken. He sagged in relief when it revealed his son was uninjured. "Help me carry him to bed," he asked, looking up at the werewolf. He could lift Shadow from a bed or a chair but not from the floor due to his crippled leg.

Shadow turned, thinking his father was addressing his boyfriend. Instead, his feverish eyes found the form of a strange older man. He tensed, confused.

"Why can't you use a spell?" Sirius asked quietly, following behind Remus. He was overwhelmed at the sight of his skeletal and ill godson.

"The healing magic in his system is delicate," Remus answered as he crouched to pull Shadow into his arms. "Using magic on him could upset the balance and either cancel the healing charms and potions or lessen their effectiveness."

Shadow was shocked to his very core that his father allowed this man to touch him. A second stranger came up behind the one touching him. He was outnumbered! Flashbacks of the graveyard, of his Uncle and Dudley, of Dumbledore torturing him while saying he had only his best interests at heart… He was so scared he felt like he’d die.

Remus jerked back as if struck, releasing the teen, as the scent of terror filled the hall.

Severus instantly hunched forward, covering Shadow's body with his own. "You are safe. It's merely Lupin and Black. They won't hurt you."

"Draco!" Shadow screamed, his pitch high and desperate. His breath came in harsh gasps. His heart rocketed against his ribs. Dots crowded his vision and he knew he'd pass out soon, becoming helpless and vulnerable to these men. "… Draco…" he wheezed, knowing his love would protect him from everyone and everything.

"We're going," Remus said tightly, already moving back.

Remus turned to grab Sirius only to see his friend go flying back. Sirius hit the corner of the wall with a loud crash before tumbling limply down the stairs, unconscious. Remus eyes went wide and an instinctive snarl twisted his lips as he stared at the creature before him. Remus blocked the first violent grab, but Draco was too fast. He lifted Remus up bodily and flung him after Sirius.

Severus had his wand up and aimed as his former student prowled forward. His eyes were glowing silver and there wasn't anything human in his cold, deadly expression. Severus felt mental powers clawing at his mind, trying to paralyze him. His Occlumency shields held but just barely. Thin lips lifted in silent warning, revealing distended canines.

Shadow felt his heart do a leap before beginning to slow. He was safe. Draco was there and that's all he needed to know. His head fell limply against the chest behind him, tilting to the side and exposing his neck as he sighed, exhausted once more. "Draco…"

Severus watched as the blond's eyes fastened on his son's throat. He knew instantly that Draco had just reached his limit of control. There would be no reaching him. Without hesitating, he cast the strongest Blasting Curse he could.

Shadow's eyes widened as Draco was slammed backward. His lover went rolling and came up in a crouch, literally snarling. For the first time, Shadow noticed the glowing eyes, the sharp fangs, and his stomach dropped in dread. What had happened?

Draco came to his feet and sprinted forward, almost on all fours. Severus was ready. He spelled the rug to come to life and wrap itself around the maddened vampire. Draco slashed out at it, but it wrapped him up faster than he could destroy it. Severus then summoned the nearest chandelier. It broke free of the ceiling in the greeting hall and flew upstairs, unwinding as it went. It wrapped around Draco's struggling form, imprisoning his arms to his chest and toppling him over as Severus made the metal a hundred times heavier. A howl of rage escaped Draco's throat, the sound terrifying in its volume, but the scream of absolute longing and despair that followed was exponentially worse.

"Stop it. You're hurting him," Shadow cried, shaken.

"I'm protecting him from himself," Severus argued sharply. "He'd be devastated if he ever hurt you. As it is, he will be inconsolable at the fact he tried to attack you at all."

"But he wasn't!" Shadow protested and squirmed in his father's strong grasp. "He was protecting me. He came when I called for help."

"At first, but that was not his intention in the end." Severus carefully leveraged himself up. "Help me," he demanded, tugging on Shadow's arm to get him to rise also.

"You don't know that. You don't know what he was going to do. Draco wouldn't hurt me!"

Severus finally got Shadow on his feet and was able to sweep him up into his arms before Shadow's legs could give out once more. He carried him as quickly as he could back into his bedroom and laid him down. "Rest. I will take care of Draco."

"But…"

"Rest. That is the best thing you can do for him right now," Severus insisted. Without waiting for a response, he left the room and quickly spelled it so no sounds could get through.

Draco was still thrashing and howling. Severus carefully stepped around him, ignoring the snapping jaws at his ankles. The wisest thing to do was let the blond wear himself out. So Severus left him alone as he hurried downstairs to check on the others. Remus was just coming to, but Sirius was still out cold, his face already beginning to swell.

"What happened?" Remus asked groggily.

"You were mildly concussed. Black even more so."

"What?" Remus turned and saw his friend. He quickly cast healing charms to prevent brain swelling. "Draco…"

"Hasn't been able to leave the house in several days due to Shadow's need of constant care. It has shredded his control. He obviously was closer to breaking down than he realized."

"Will he be okay?"

Severus nodded. "Once he exhausts himself, I'll give him his potion. It will give him enough control to go out and take the edge off his cravings."

"How?" Remus asked curiously. They had never said what Draco did to keep things under control.

Severus cursed mentally at having given so much away. He knew Draco wanted no one to know what'd been forced to do to remain human. It would literally break him if Shadow ever got wind of his activities. "Don't concern yourself about it. We need to clean up this mess."

Remus let it go. Severus was right. Sirius needed care and there was debris and a hole in the ceiling to deal with due to the missing chandelier. Besides, his mind was still a bit scrambled from the hard blow to his head. He probably wouldn't understand Severus's answer right now anyway.

**xXx**

_~ Sunday, March 11th ~_

Hermione groaned. Pain shot through her head as she moved her stiff neck. She tried to see how bad the injury was, but her hand was stuck beside her. She moved the other only to find it was also held in place. Her heart rate kicked up. The pain intensified as she opened her eyes, but she had to _see_. Her worst fear was realized. It was dark except for the light coming from under and around a door at the top of the stairs. She was tied up with rope and chains. It smelled like dust and damp earth. A basement, she was in a basement. She was tied up.

"Dursley," she whispered in horror.

This couldn't be happening. Her panic reached its peak, and she thrashed against her bindings, only managing to hurt herself further. Nausea rolled through her gut; her head throbbed in time to her racing heart. It forced herself to still or be violently sick and then pass out. The pain was incredible. She flinched as she remembered racing for that tree, the sound of the crash, the impact… Hot tears burned her cheeks as they slid down her filthy, blood-streaked face. She sobbed until she couldn't anymore. She laid there, breathing deep, pain and exhaustion making it hard to think.

All that disappeared, however, when she heard the heavy footsteps. She froze, eyes wide, her whole body locking up, not even breathing. The door to her prison opened. The light immediately blinded her, sending agony through her head. She must have whimpered because she heard Dursley laugh.

"Hurts, doesn't it?" he asked as he came to a stop right in front of her. "Looks like you freaks are nothing special after all."

"What do you want?" she sobbed, shaking in fear.

"Do you know what it's like?" Dudley asked softly. He crouched and smiled when she flinched away from his hand. She couldn't go far, however, and he stroked her hair almost gently. "Growing up with a freak, having to deal with his shite? He was nothing but trouble for my family. And what did we get out of it, huh? My parents are _dead_."

"Don't do this," she begged.

"Shhh," he soothed and lifted her chin so he could look into her terrified eyes. "This… This is _nothing_. I was fifteen when I found my parents butchered. Their blood covered the walls. The smell was so thick, I can still taste it. He cut them up like animals. He _murdered_ them."

"It was Death Eaters!" Hermione cried.

"Oh no. I know the truth. It was Harry. Harry killed them. And I'm going to find him and make him pay." He released her chin and stood, his eyes cold. "My father was too lenient on the freak. He should have killed him when he found him on our doorstep. You all should be killed."

"No," she moaned, low in her throat, terrified for her life.

"Since you were friends with the freak, and because you've realized the error of your ways and forsaken magic, I'll give you a chance. I'll let you go if you tell me where Harry is," Dudley promised.

"He's dead!" Hermione yelled desperately. "He died in the war!"

Dudley tisked and walked to the right. Hermione paled as he opened a toolbox and lifted out a heavy wrench. "I understand that this is hard for you, but you're going to have to do better than that. Think of this as a test at that school of yours. One you _desperately_ don't want to fail."

"I'm not lying!" she shrieked. "I'm not! I can prove it! I can get you a paper! It reported his death, everyone mourns him! No! Don't!"

Dudley lifted the wrench and brought it down on her shoulder viciously. "Don't lie to me, bitch!"

Hermione screamed as agony exploded through her shoulder. Panting harshly, gasping at the pain, she was barely able to see as he raised it high, an unholy grin splitting his face. She thought of Ron. He had died for her. Now she was going to die at the hands of this psycho a mere three years later? Her fear caught fire, transforming into rage, and she drew deeply on the power she'd denied for so long.

Dudley bellowed as he was flung back by an invisible force. He knocked over boxes and went tumbling to the floor. Hermione scrambled out of the melted chains, the withered ropes. Her legs wobbled, her shoulder screamed in agony, her arm hung limply at her side, but she was determined to make it out of this basement alive. She ran for the stairs, stumbling. Dudley roared! She looked back to see him come to his feet, enraged.

"You lying, evil FREAK!"

Hermione screamed and bolted for the door. His hand caught her ankle just as she reached the top. She went down hard on her bad shoulder. Blackness swallowed her, but she fought against it, knowing she would die if she passed out now. Beefy hands went around her throat. Hermione kicked weakly. She was going under. Death's cold touch shivered through her. She bucked, denial screaming through her mind. Dudley released her with a shriek of madness, his palms burnt.

"Is everything okay, Dudley?"

Hermione turned her head to see a door. It was being opened. A young man looked in, his eyes going wide.

"Help me!" she rasped, begging as she reached for him. "Please help me!"

Dudley snarled and backhanded her hard.

Ears ringing, still fighting desperately against unconsciousness, Hermione felt Dudley's heavy weight leave her body. The sounds of a scuffle, cursing, then a deafening bang. Hermione jerked, eyes wide as she watched her kidnapper stumble, blood blooming on his shirt. He staggered and went down. Her rescuer was shaking, eyes wide, a gun in his hand. It fell with a clatter and Hermione burst into tears.

"Thank you…" she sobbed over and over. "Thank you."

He didn't answer her. Instead, he numbly went to the phone and dialed the police.

**xXx**

Shadow stared at the ceiling, hardly noticing as the shadows grew longer as the hours passed. Eventually the room was plunged into darkness. His father had come earlier and asked if he was okay if Remus came in to tend to him. Shadow had agreed. With prior warning, he was able to brace himself for the presence of someone new, although he didn't like it at all that he was completely dependent on Severus for protection.

He knew intellectually Remus wouldn't hurt him, but his instincts dictated mistrust and his gut reaction was fear. Too many people had hurt him terribly in his life who shouldn't have been able to. It would be a long time before he was able to relax with anyone except Draco and his father around him.

After being treated by the werewolf, his father returned with food. Severus had granted him the day to rest and had left him mostly alone, except when he came in every three hours with demands that he eat. Shadow hadn't used the time to rest, however. His thoughts churned over Draco and his condition. He didn't need Severus to tell him that Draco had become infected with vampirism, a magical disease worse than even lycanthropy. There were some groups who advocated werewolf rights. There were none who supported vampires.

Shadow hadn't studied the condition in depth. All he knew for sure was that there was no return, no cure, and unlike with werewolves there was no remaining humanity left once the disease took over. The rest was left to his imagination and he had a very vivid one. Draco's screams and mindless, feral gaze had told him enough.

All day, he contemplated his options. He was no fool. He knew his limits. His body was a wreck and his mind was precariously balanced. He was highly vulnerable. Any small thing could tip him over and do irreparable harm, but the thought of doing nothing as Draco suffered was unacceptable.

Draco had stood by him for years and supported him against unbelievably horrible odds. He planned murder in Shadow's name, turned against his father, suffered the death of his mother, became an orphan, and had not once blamed Shadow or turned his back on him. Draco had helped Shadow stand after he shattered more than once. Draco had endured Demon, Boy, and Seraphim, but more than that, he had loved every aspect of him, even when Shadow hated him for it.

He knew now. He _remembered_. Draco's kindness, patience, and understanding would never be forgotten. In the midst of powerful fear, Draco had been a safe companion. The blond had _played_ with him and shared the frightening joy of simple Wizarding toys. He had witnessed the extent and power of Demon's rage and, instead of fleeing, he stood between him and Aurors, trying to protect him. Draco had also given himself fully into his care. He had submitted sexually and had become a supportive member of his pack. Without Draco, Shadow would have been alone. Worse, he would have been lost.

The feelings he had for his lover were too complex and deep to really explain. It went beyond love, need, gratitude, dependence, friendship, or any other word he could think of. Words just couldn't express the sheer _emotion_ he felt for Draco. Then to add to all of that, Draco had stood by his comatose body and bathed him, read to him, and continued unwavering in his devotion.

Shadow literally could not bear for all that to be returned with inaction and helplessness on his part when Draco was _suffering_. Draco and he… They belonged to each other in a way that only they could understand. Not even Severus truly grasped how deep their bond was.

And that thought naturally led to how he'd marked both Draco and Marissa when he'd been Seraphim. He remembered the desperate need to forge a tangible connection to his pack, the people who had joined him and became his family. Of course, that family was larger than he'd realized at the time. It included Severus and Neville, even Remus and Sirius, but for now what he focused on was the fact that he _had_ marked Draco. It gave him a way to find and monitor him.

The problem was Shadow's magic was completely tied up in helping him heal, plus his physical weakness limited his ability to control and manipulate magic. He could hurt himself, even fall back into a coma, if he overextended himself. Shadow was aware enough to know he couldn't trust himself to recognize that line before he crossed it, but what else could he do? Leave Draco alone, distressed and suffering something he should never have been exposed to in the first place? Hadn't they all suffered enough?

Decision made, Shadow planned carefully. He thought he knew of a way he would be able to help and also limit the risk he was taking with his health, so he brooded as the sun slowly sank and darkness fell. Severus came and turned the lights on, bringing in another tray of spiked porridge. Tonight it was beef.

"How are you feeling?"

"Fine," Shadow answered shortly. He kept his head lowered, afraid his father would see he was planning something. Fortunately for him, it seemed Severus was tired and distracted. To further distract the man, he asked, "How's Sirius?"

"Regaining his mind. Lupin is certain the mutt will make a full recovery by morning." Severus focused on his son's face, watching it carefully. "Would you be up for a visit before he departs?"

Shadow just the thought made him queasy. "As long as you or Draco are with me," he answered softly, embarrassed about his irrational insecurities. "Just to be safe."

"Of course. That goes without saying." Severus gently laid his hand on top of Shadow's. "You will feel better once we get you physically healthy. Don't be too discouraged with yourself. You are coping amazingly well. I am inordinately proud of you."

Shadow flushed, warmth flooding his system. "Thanks. I am trying."

"I know you are." Severus smiled. He reached out to casually stroke a hand over his son's hair.

Shadow smiled back, his two-colored eyes bright but also tired. Severus mourned the fact that those eyes looked like they belonged in a face wrinkled from old age. Shadow had just turned eighteen years old, practically still a child, and three of those years he'd spent unconscious. On the other hand, Severus felt blessed that they were open and aware at all. A lesser man would have been broken and driven to insanity by Shadow's experiences, yet his son was still with him, damaged but miraculously whole.

"Get some sleep," Severus ordered and was pleased when Shadow nodded easily. "Call for Omi if you need me. He will fetch me immediately."

"Night," Shadow answered as he lay down and pulled the covers up to his chin. He didn't dare close his eyes, however. He was afraid he truly would fall asleep. Exhaustion was never very far from him nowadays.

He waited until the count of one hundred to be sure Severus wouldn't come back to check on him, or Remus, or Sirius, or anyone else. He did not want to be discovered. It wouldn't be hard for any of the adults to overcome him and prevent him from going after Draco.

Satisfied, he closed his eyes and took a deep calming breath. He couldn't fully Occlude, a seascape no longer felt right. It didn’t matter. He wasn't trying to Occlude. He wanted his Animagus Transfiguration. Like Occlumency, it could be different now that he’d merged with his last alter, but he was going to try it anyway.

His Animagus form had changed every time he'd merged with an alter, but theoretically when you cast the Animagus spell successfully it locked that form as your Animagus permanently, even if you were to undergo a serious spiritual or psychological change. However, that didn't stop him from having two Animagus forms, which was supposed to be impossible: the lynx, which was the form he should have officially locked as his permanent Animagus form, and then the dove/werewolf combination Seraphim had created.

Shadow had no idea what he would transform into now and knew if he didn't have a good grasp on the anatomy of his form he could really hurt himself, not to mention prevent himself from ever having an Animagus form again. If you didn't get it right the first time, the incomplete magic would block the transformation from ever taking place. He was hoping his sheer magical strength would protect him.

Shadow’s body practically vibrated with exhaustion. He felt a trembling wave of sheer physical illness wash over him and thought he'd chosen wrong, that he'd done something incredibly stupid. His instincts had _again_ led him astray. But then he was changing, his body shifting into something else.

Wings grew from his back, forcing him into a sitting position. His hair lengthened and spilled down his back, becoming _more_. The sheer power of it wrapped around him like a cape, making him feel dangerous. His muscles became stronger, more flexible under his skin. His five senses became more sensitive and his mind less complex.

He wasn't quite thinking like an animal; it was more reminiscent to how he felt as Seraphim. However, he didn't feel poised between burning cold rage and oily terror. The absolute mental focus on survival was missing as well. He was all of himself, but it felt like he'd been pared down to his most basic desires, the simplest needs. And the need for Draco to be well and near him had transferred over to his more animalistic mind seamlessly.

Rising from the bed, Seraphim looked down to find himself on two steady legs, still wearing pajama bottoms. He tested them, crouched and stood, and was pleased with the smooth strength they demonstrated, as well as his flexibility. He examined his chest next. His top had been shredded by the growth of his wings. The skin was smooth. Lean muscles rippled as he stretched, protecting the organs they contained. He found the same evidence of health and strength in his arms. He was _very_ pleased. His nails were longer and harder than a human's. That pleased him as well. He knew how effective claws were as a weapon.

Prowling silently forward, he placed himself in front of the mirror on the back of the closet door. His body looked human, the skin hairless. His face was not like a werewolf's. His teeth were sharper, but they were set in a human mouth. His pupils were slit, the irises two-colored: one was dark brown, the other gold, just as they had been in his lynx form. His ebony hair almost fell to his ankles and waved around him gently.

He could feel the Black magic singing in his body, whispering about the delicious glory found in pure destruction. He'd be lost to it if it wasn't perfectly balanced out by the White magic, humming of the joy of restoring things to a state of wholeness. The representation of this awesome White power were two five-foot long wings. They lifted from his back and curled slightly forward. They still had mangled feathers, but he was pleased to see the blood had gone. His wounds had healed a great deal.

Satisfied with his physical strength, he let his eyes fall to half-mast as he stretched out his senses for his mate. The Black became agitated as he called on the bond it had created years ago. It lifted around him into long spikes. He immediately sensed the two who were tied to him. One was far away, healthy, and content. The other was closer.

He hissed, his fingers arching into claws, as sensation poured through him. Turning, his wings flaring to keep him balanced, he leapt for the window. The Black slashed forward, destroying the wards and glass between him and his mate. He gracefully somersaulted through the air and landed in a crouch before sprinting in the direction of the small town that lay to the east.

While he ran, he dug into the connection to his mate, absorbing every new understanding. His mate was at _war_ with himself, and he was losing. Self-disgust battled with overwhelming craving. Morality clashed with hunger. Humanity struggled against ravening beast.

Once Seraphim managed to shift through these violent emotional and physical storms, he was able to sense exactly what the price of Draco's control was. Draco was in the middle of coupling right that minute. The mindless, consuming sex allowed him to satisfy his cravings in a less inhuman way.

Seraphim lifted his head and howled his fury into the sky. He had no illusions. He knew there'd been many sexual partners, and Draco had craved them, lost himself in the pleasure of their body. It had fulfilled Draco's profound need, leaving him grateful but also desperately unhappy. That misery soothed Seraphim's temper slightly. This would end. Now. Tonight. His mate would no longer suffer, and no one would ever touch what was his again.

_You're_ ** _mine_** _,_ Seraphim thought with utter certainty and put on a burst of speed.

**xXx**

Draco came awake instantly as the sun set. His whole body jerked as if electrocuted; the scent of sex and female assailed his nose. He was at the apartment of one of the call girls in town. His hunger had been so great he hadn't been able to make it home before the sun rose and he'd collapsed unconscious, still inside the whore. Now he was sprawled on his back, the woman stroking his chest with a large, sleepy grin.

"Hey, there, handsome. I was afraid I wore you out completely," she said in a husky voice.

He pushed her aside and moved toward his clothes without saying anything. She had sex for money. The fact that he both paid handsomely and made her orgasm repeatedly was the reason behind the fact that the whores favored him. However, her hungry looks made him evaluate his own hunger. He'd taken her several times last night and had been with two others before he'd gotten to her. He should've been fine for another couple of days, but instead he could feel the bloodlust simmering. It wasn't yet a boil, but it would be by tomorrow night.

Closing his eyes and steeling himself, he turned back to the bed. It was best just to get this over with now, so he'd be free for a few nights to be with his love. Merlin, he hated himself. If it didn't mean leaving Shadow alone, he'd have killed himself long ago. He was the most disgusting creature on earth. What kind of humanity was he salvaging if he had to become a whore himself to keep it?

Her eyes lit up in anticipation as he turned to face her.

"You know better," he murmured with a dark, ironic smile. "I'm insatiable."

She laughed and flung the covers off her naked body, her legs already spread for him. He growled as the rush of hunger and lust flooded his senses. He grabbed her calves and yanked her toward him, leaving his pants on, as he hooked her legs over his elbows. She was already wet, so his violent thrust forward into her depths was one of pure pleasure for her.

She arched with a cry, her hands scrambling for leverage. As he took her at a brutal pace, he closed his eyes tight. He could hardly do this. Now with fresh memories of Shadow gazing at him, talking, smiling… The sex tore him apart, knowing his love was a mere ten miles away, completely conscious as Draco betrayed him.

"Yes, _unh_ , oh, god, YES!" the woman screamed, oblivious to his tears.

Draco couldn't do it. The hunger wasn't strong enough to overwhelm his disgust. He felt her come and pulled out, still hard. She lay nearly senseless. He couldn't look at her as he scrambled into his clothes. He was just putting money on her dresser when the mark on his neck grew hot rapidly, stopping just this side of pain.

He stood, blind, his whole body focused on that mark, terrified he knew what it meant. Seraphim was back and he _knew_. Cold dread paralyzed him. He felt sick. Horror made him want to shriek and rail against the world. Shadow was _never_ supposed to know! He was never supposed to find out what Draco had become! He couldn't stand it if he did; Draco would rather _die_!

In the direction of home, came a long, rage-filled howl.

Draco shivered. He wasn't sure if it was his suicidal thoughts or what he'd been doing that had caused that terrifying sound, but oddly enough he now felt calmer. The promise of punishment was almost a relief. It was finally over. One way or another, he would no longer have to live like this.

"What was that?" the woman panted from behind him. She was scrambling into some clothes. "Wolves?"

He looked over his shoulder, his eyes flashing with hypnotic power. "Get dressed and leave this town. Go as far as you can and don't stop until dawn. Go!"

Dazed, she hurriedly obeyed.

Draco moved quickly out of the apartment and into the street. He wouldn't let his love's rage be taken out on the people he'd slept with. It wasn't their fault. He wouldn't let them die because of him. Plus, he knew Shadow would be distressed when he returned to his right mind if he killed anyone in a fit of rage. With this in mind, Draco began to run in the direction of the house and his irate lover, hoping to meet him before he reached town.

He almost didn't make it. Draco was a very short three hundred yards past the last house when Seraphim loped into view. They both came to a skidding stop, their chests heaving with exertion. For a brief moment, Draco's fears and anxiety melted away as he took in the magnificent form of his lover.

Seraphim stepped forward and drew himself up to his full height. His shadow-hair flared out behind him in a sensuous wave and his wings arched high and spread wide in a glorious display. He was shorter than he had been, only an inch or so taller than Shadow was naturally instead of the six feet two inches he'd been previously. In fact, he thought Seraphim was now exactly Draco’s height and wondered if that was a coincidence.

There was no evidence of a werewolf in Seraphim’s facial features, which relieved Draco greatly. He knew what it was like to be controlled by instincts that were not naturally your own and didn't want that for Seraphim. Despite the lack of werewolf, Seraphim’s body was superbly muscled and fit, the same as before, but now there were dark tattoos adorning the tan skin.

A slender snake tail curled around the outside of Seraphim's eye, the rope-like body tracing over his high cheekbone before crossing back over his cheek. The delicate viper head rested just below the corner of Seraphim’s mouth. Draco dimly realized this represented Silas.

On Seraphim's right bicep, Gabriel's mountain lion was captured in mid-roar.

Rose's doe stood grazing over his sternum, the lines of her legs and head graceful and beautiful, the dark eyes full of gentle emotion.

Last, a house cat was depicted on its back, stretching sensually under Seraphim's belly button, between his two hipbones. Draco guessed this represented Kitten.

The only two alters left were Demon and Boy, but he thought the Black and White magic were all that was needed to represent those two mindsets. They hadn't been fully developed minds anyway. In all, Draco felt overwhelmed with Seraphim's beauty. He was absolutely gorgeous, grace and power illustrated with every move.

"Seraphim," he rasped, throat tight with emotion. "I'm sorry."

Draco felt vile in comparison to his beautiful mate. Shadow deserved so much better after all he'd suffered. He certainly didn't need more filth in his life. Heart racing, mind flying at incredible speeds, Draco threw himself to his knees before his love and bowed his head to reveal the vulnerable back of his neck. Chocked sobs exploded from his chest. He pressed his hands flat to the ground and prayed for punishment.

_I deserve it, please hurt me, save me, break me into a thousand pieces, let this end, I'm so tired,_ Draco's thoughts tumbled rapidly through his chaotic mind. He squeezed his eyes shut and knew he'd die if Seraphim did nothing, if he just walked away.

Seraphim stared down at his lover who was submitting to him completely. It was a delicious sight and sent righteous power flooding through his veins. He wanted to take his mate right there, claim him and make it clear to whom he belonged, but first Seraphim had to get rid of the disgusting filth covering his mate's body. The scent of at least four others stained Draco's perfect skin, almost overpowering Draco's own luscious scent. Worse, he could sense sickness pervading his mate's body down to the genetic level. With a snarl, he sent the Black crashing forward.

Draco screamed as boiling tar drenched him from head to foot, but he didn't move. He reveled in the agony, wanted it to burn brighter and brighter until nothing else existed anymore. As he screamed, he felt his thoughts disintegrating until he was almost granted his wish.

Just as he teetered at the edge of madness, a cool breeze whispered over the inferno of his body. The soothing sensation grew slowly, and slowly he came down from the height of agony, sobbing harshly, feeling almost cleansed.

Cooing into his mate's ear, Seraphim held Draco as he wept. His glowing wings passed over Draco’s body again and again until Draco’s spasms stopped, the pain pushed out with the White. Seraphim licked and nuzzled the pale neck exposed to him, shivering at the taste he knew so well. He licked around a shapely ear and grinned when he felt his mate begin to respond.

Draco groaned and cracked open alluring silver eyes.

" _Mine,"_ Seraphim spoke clearly, eyes locked with his mate's.

Draco had no idea what Seraphim said, it had been spoken in Parseltongue, but he had an idea. "Yours," he groaned, heart beating so fast he was certain it would explode. "Always yours." Then he passed out.

Seraphim supported his mate easily. Triumph beat through his body and he threw his head back with a victorious howl. He lifted Draco into his arms, cradling his limp body carefully to his chest. His wings extended out behind him for balance, and with another howl, he set off back to their nest. It was time to go home.

**Chapter end.**


	3. Be Mine

**Be Mine**

Draco cracked open his eyes slowly. His whole body throbbed with pervasive heat. Maybe he had a fever? Black hair tickled his nose. A smile stretched his mouth before he could think about it and he pulled Shadow's thin body closer to his own protectively. A moment later, he went stiff, his eyes wide as he remembered the night before.

_Shit!_ he thought furiously, heart knocking against his ribs.

Shadow's eyes fluttered open, revealing crystal blue and clear lime green.

Instantly, Draco decided to brazen it out. He smiled and said, "Hey, how are you feeling?"

There was no response for a moment. Shadow just watched him. Draco felt sweat bead his brow and his face strain to hide his anxiousness. Shadow couldn't know! Please let him not remember! Draco would do anything to keep him from knowing what he'd been reduced to. Shame burned the back of his throat like acid.

"Draco, I've merged with all my alters. I am Seraphim. Just as Padfoot is Sirius."

Draco jumped from the bed, jostling Shadow roughly. The heat of shame stained his cheeks a hot crimson as he realized he was naked. Yanking the closet door open, Draco yanked on some slacks. He felt so disgusting, and he hated that Shadow was staring. The two-colored eyes scorched his skin.

"My uncle hit me around, but it didn't get really bad until he realized I'd heal overnight no matter what he did to me. I didn't understand, of course, not as Boy, that I was practically encouraging him to torture me. His sadistic streak got wider and wider. He began to experiment, knowing he could and not suffer the consequences of a broken or dead body the next morning. In that way, I was his accomplice. I made it possible for him to practically kill me over and over.”

Shadow wrapped his arms around his torso almost brutally tight. His face went bone pale. His eyes large and haunted, shining with tears. “He p-peeled my skin. Stabbed me. Burned me. Beat me ’til bones broke. Choked me… I know about helplessness, Draco, in all its many forms."

Draco felt himself turn around, his attention captivated by the petite man sitting up in the bed. Still too thin but no longer skeletal. Messy, curly black hair falling over his ears and carelessly across his forehead. Angular features. Cupid bow lips. Sharp jawline. Shadow’s expression was carefully neutral, but his eyes betrayed his pain.

"I didn't want to remember. I really didn't…" Shadow took a deep breath. His arms uncurled, his movements stiff. He clenched his hands into fists, resting them in his lap. "But Voldemort was going to win, even against Seraphim's power. I couldn't think! I needed to be Shadow, too. So I merged.”

Tears streamed down Shadow’s pale face. His breathing hitched, on the verge of out right crying. “All this time, I've been trapped in my memories, living them all over again, having to face them with my mind whole." He shook his head hard, reminding himself he did have a point, and raised his eyes again. "You've been suffering while I was lost in myself. I wasn't there for you when you needed me, even though you've always been there for me when I needed you."

"Shadow…" Draco tried to interrupt, taking a step forward.

"No! This needs to be said!” Shadow was on his feet now. His broken morphed instantly into something angry and determined. “You always get hurt in your efforts to help me! You killed for me when you were only fourteen years old, Draco! You renounced your father, left your mother… You helped me when I was insane and put up with my _stupid_ jealousy over your relationship with Seraphim! I should have been on my knees in gratitude that you cared about my damaged alters. What did I do instead? I gave you hell! You didn't deserve it, Draco. None of it. I mean, you're a Slytherin for God's sake! What did you get out of this?"

Shadow was still in the pajama bottoms from last night. His legs were stronger, the atrophy gone, but they were still weak from not being used in three years. He grabbed the headboard, his knuckles turning white. His whole body shook with emotion. His expression softened. Anger and terror draining away to be replaced by something just as strong.

Draco thought Shadow was gorgeous. It took everything he had not to move forward and support him, but he knew it wouldn't be accepted right now. Besides, he was reeling from everything he was hearing.

"I'll tell you what you got in return,” Shadow said softly, voice as warm as his gaze. “You got a dreadful disease and were rejected by the Wizarding world, your dreams of power and prestige all gone. Worse, you got a broken lover you had to take care of twenty-four-seven.”

"You are _not_ broken," Draco growled, his control snapped. Shadow was in front of him. He couldn’t hold back. He had to touch him, had to know this was real, that Shadow was alive and awake. He stalked forward and gently grabbed Shadow's jaw, lifting his lover’s face so he could stare into those gorgeous eyes. "You are the strongest, most beautiful…"

"Draco, shut up," Shadow drawled, a smile peaking out the corner of his lips. "The point is, do you really think I'd hold it against you that you had to sleep with other people to survive? Do you think I'd rather see you dead? Hell no! I don't care _what_ it takes or _what_ you do if it's to save your life. I…" Tears spilled over once more. The warm liquid hit Draco's thumb on one side, his fingers on the other. "I wouldn't know what to do without you, Draco."

"Shhh." Draco smoothed the tears away. He pulled his lover's trembling body into his, helping to support his too light weight. He brushed a tender kiss on Shadow's forehead. It felt amazing! Both topless, warm skin pressed against warm skin. They could feel each other’s heart beat. “I’ve got you."

"Well, last night, I had you," Shadow answered softly. He lifted his arms to wrap around Draco's waist.

They stood there like that until his trembling stopped. Gently, Shadow pushed Draco away and looked up into his love's eyes, more serious than he'd ever been in his life. "I know I'm still a mess, but…"

Draco frowned in confusion as Shadow gripped his forearms and lowered himself to his knees.

Shadow grinned up at him, just taking his lover in. Draco’s hair was longer than Shadow was used to, the silky tresses falling past his strong jaw. Draco looked older than he last remembered him, too. He was taller, but he hadn't lost the lean athletic build Shadow was so familiar with. He was beautiful and Shadow loved him with all his heart.

"Will you marry me?"

Draco's mouth fell open in utter shock. "Merlin," he breathed dumbly, completely unable to say anything else. This couldn't be happening! This was a dream and he'd wake up aching and hard as he had a hundred mornings before.

Shadow's heart was rocketing in his chest. Had he not made himself clear? Did he do it wrong? What if Draco said no? Maybe wizards couldn't get married. Why hadn't he thought this through? Maybe Draco was planning on leaving once he woke, his duty done? Now Shadow was pressuring the blond to stay. As his mind raced, a hundred different fears screaming at him, Shadow dropped his head, ashamed he hadn't thought of all the implications of this. He just knew he wanted Draco with him always. How selfish was that?

Immediately Shadow began trembling. Sweat beaded up on his face. Tears blurred his eyes. "I'm sorry. You don't have to say anything. I understand." He released Draco's arms and used the bed to leverage himself up. He sat heavily, his legs aching. "You've given me more than anyone could rightfully ask for. It was horrible of me to ask for more."

Draco dropped to his knees beside the bed, in front of his lover, and grabbed Shadow's hands. He looked up urgently into Shadow’s heart-broken eyes. “No, love. I'm just shocked. It never occurred to me that you would forgive me, that you'd still want me."

"There's nothing to forgive." Shadow glared angrily. "Aren't you listening to me? You have nothing to be ashamed of!”

"I do," Draco argued, "but that's beside the point. I love you, Shadow. Your answer is yes. I would love to be your husband more than anything in the world."

Shadow's eyes widened in joyful surprise. His magic rose up from within him and poured down their clasped hands.

Draco accepted the magical claiming with a smile and asked in return, "Will you be mine?"

Shadow laughed, his face shinning with love and excitement. "Of course, idiot! Why else would I ask you?"

Draco’s magic rushing out to claim the man before him. Shadow gasped and they leaned forward as one. Their mouths were hungry and needy; lips sliding, tongues battling. Fingers curled into hair and grasped onto warm skin. Draco pressed forward until Shadow fell backward onto the bed with Draco pressing forward between Shadow’s knees, covering Shadow’s body with his own.

Shadow gasped. His hands slid down Draco's muscled back, thrilling in the silky feel of his love’s skin, the ridges of his ribs, the knots of his spine. It felt incredible! Practically mewling, he wrapped his legs around Draco’s waist and thrust his hips up.

"Love you," Draco groaned, pressing down to give Shadow the friction he needed.

He kissed fervently along his lover's jaw, feeling fine stubble. His hips rocked steadily and he thrilled in the delicious pressure, letting it build. Shadow tossed his head to the side, his eyes glazed, moans and needy gasps filling the short space between them. Draco's mouth found Shadow’s ear. He sucked on the lobe, tonguing it before biting gently. Shadow gasped loudly, nails scratching at his lover's back and shoulders.

Draco growled and quickened his pace, thrusting against the hard body under him. His lips followed down the pale neck, sucking and nipping. Sweat stung his eyes, thoughts melted away until all that was left was the pleasure between them. It was nothing like the nights he spent with faceless bodies. It was so much more. He felt like he was coming apart at the seams, while at the same time he was focused completely on adoring the body under his. He wanted this, he _needed_ it… Draco’s mouth latched onto the juncture between Shadow's neck and shoulder and he bit down, trembling on the edge of orgasm.

Shadow came with an uninhibited yell of pure pleasure. His whole body arched up into his lovers, molding himself to every curve. Stars exploded behind his eyes and he fought to stay conscious as waves of ecstasy washed through him. He was hardly aware of Draco shouting out, his solid body going limp and curling around Shadow's own.

Their panting breaths filled their ears as they slowly came back to earth. Shadow had never felt so content. The peace was broken, however, when Draco sat up, wild-eyed. Draco grabbed Shadow and hurriedly turned his head to the side so he could see his shoulder. A lovely bruise was forming, but the skin was unbroken. Draco’s legs gave out in relief and he found himself kneeling on the floor, his forehead pressed against he bed. His shoulders shook with the aftermath of his terror.

Shadow sat up and gently stroked his fine blond hair. "Hey, it's okay. I don't think you're the same as you were. Not after the Black and White magic.” Draco lifted his head. The desperate hope there brought tears Shadow's his eyes. "Besides, you'd _never_ hurt me, love. I know that. So should you."

Draco pulled his lover closer, inserting himself between Shadow's legs once more. He wrapped his arms around Shadow’s waist and kissed his stomach with trembling lips. Shadow tangled his hand in his lover's hair, lifting his head as he bent down. Swollen lips met, moist tongues twining together in an erotic dance, making both of them shiver.

Without ending their kiss, Draco pushed up on his knees and began to undo his pants. Shadow fumbled for his own buttons, mind filled with cotton, body throbbing with desire, chest tight with joy. Draco shimmied out of his pants, glad to pull away the wet cotton from his skin, and began to press Shadow back down on the bed just as the bedroom door opened without warning.

Draco lifted his head with glowing silver eyes and stared at the intruder with a warning growl.

Severus stood frozen. The glowing eyes attested to Draco sliding into a more vampiric state. Was Draco feeding on his son?

Shadow groaned as he felt his lover's hot erection pushing into his hip, skin to skin. His own pants were bunched around his thighs. The smell of their last orgasm filled the air with a musky tangy scent that went straight to Shadow’s groin, making him groan. He was so lost to the lust flooding his senses that it took him several moments to realize Draco had stopped and was looking off to the side.

Shadow turned his head, still breathless and rocking slightly against his lover. Black eyes glanced down into his own and his passion was doused instantly. Shadow tensed, hunching his body under Draco's as he pulled frantically for the blankets.

Draco stood unashamedly, casually buttoning his pants. "Knock next time."

Severus felt his cheeks heat up and only years of self-restraint kept his voice even as he responded, "Lupin would like to check on you both. Perhaps in the dueling room."

"Okay," Shadow answered meekly, unable to meet his father's eyes.

Severus turned and left without another word. His mind was in turmoil, so it was no surprise that he headed toward the parlor and his decanter of whisky. He passed Remus in the hall. "They'll meet you in the dueling room."

Remus tilted his head in confusion. Usually he checked on the boys in the bedroom.

Severus didn't bother explaining. He made it downstairs in record time, his leg no longer troubling him. This thought reminded him of the night before. He had feared Shadow's mind had split again, but he knew instantly that wasn't the case when Seraphim's eyes lit up with warmth at seeing him. Now that he thought about it, there were quite a few differences between Seraphim of old and the one he'd met last night.

Seraphim was now smaller, his features more human. There'd been no evidence of a werewolf, even though Severus remembered animalistic characteristics, like sharper teeth and slit pupils. Seraphim’s skin had been adorned with tribal animal images as well, which on further reflection Severus realized were the animagus forms of Shadow's alters.

Last night, Seraphim had stood still under his scrutiny. When Severus had realized they'd been standing outside the front door for several moments, he quickly moved to let his son pass. Seraphim's eyes had caught on his prominent limp. Instead of going to the door, he'd moved to Severus. A white wing had extended, the feathers gently caressing his leg.

Over the last three years, Severus had remembered the sensation in his dreams. He'd thought it was something he had imagined as he lay close to death, but the euphoria and peace washed through him like a familiar drug. He'd gasped, his back hitting the side of the house as he staggered backward. When the overwhelming sensation lifted a bit, he'd looked up to see Seraphim smiling at him. The creature had bowed his head slightly and went inside cradling an unconscious Draco awkwardly in his arms.

Shaking off the memories, Severus went to the window on two perfect legs and looked out at the night, whisky burning his throat and filling his belly with heat. Shadow was very powerful and his abilities were extraordinary. It made one hesitate before considering how to handle him.

Maybe Severus was no longer needed. After all, he hadn't been able to awaken Shadow nor had he been any help in the last battle. He'd helped Shadow manage his Dissociative Identity Disorder, but it was clear that he no longer suffered from that. Neither Draco nor Shadow were children. Maybe it was time to step back.

"You're so sad. Is it because of what you saw?"

Severus turned to see Shadow leaning in the doorway. "Should you be up and about?"

"Yes. I, ah, could access my White magic in my Animagus form without the worry of being overwhelmed. It healed my atrophy, but, um, it couldn't give me strength. Using my muscles will do that, so I'm, um, supposed to walk around and, ah, exercise as much as possible."

Severus blinked at that very awkward and stuttered response. “Are you well? Where is Draco?"

"Remus is trying to figure out what exactly my, um, magic did to him."

“It didn’t cure him?" Severus had never heard of anything the White magic couldn't heal.

"Well, it didn't feel like anything I've ever felt before." Shadow wrung his hands, disappointed he hadn't been able to heal Draco completely and also nervous that Severus would be equally let down by his failure. Draco's state _was_ Shadow's fault after all. "I fixed it as best I could, but I don't think I returned him back to human."

"Shadow, sit down." Severus moved forward and gestured at the couch. He, himself, settled into the chair across from it.

They shared a smile, both remembering all the hours they'd spent in just these positions during Shadow's therapy sessions. Silence settled around them, but instead of it being comfortable, tension steadily built. Worried, Severus quickly blanked his thoughts and stilled his emotions.

"Is something the matter?" he asked casually.

Shadow ducked his head, curls falling around his eyes. "I'm sorry for what you saw. I hope you're not too upset with me."

Severus studied his son. His body was still recovering, but he looked healthier than he had in ages. He stood at a modest five foot seven inches, and his features were strong and handsome, reflecting his age of eighteen years. His eyes, however, were exactly as Severus remembered them from three years ago. With abrupt clarity, Severus realized that even though the years had passed for them all, Shadow was still the fifteen-year-old boy who had just killed Voldemort.

"I am not upset with you," he replied gently. "In fact, I owe you an apology. I promised you that in return for never locking your door, I would always knock if it were closed and wait for permission before I entered. For the last few years, I have fallen out of those rules."

Shadow peeked out through his bangs. "It's all right."

"Thank you for your forgiveness." Severus hesitated but decided it would be all right to ask. "May I assume you are happy?"

Shadow chewed his lip. "I kinda… I asked him to marry me."

Despite holding an objective mindset around him, Severus felt his eyes widen. "I presume his answer was yes."

"Yeah." Shadow grinned, but the thin arms rising up to wrap around his thin chest bespoke uncertainty. The gesture reminded Severus painfully of Shadow's comfort in the straight jacket. "He stuck it out with me through all this shit. I don't think anyone else would have. And he was so upset about having to sleep with other people. His self-disgust crawled around inside me and I just wanted to show him how much I love him. I wanted to acknowledge our relationship, acknowledge him. I want to give something back to him."

Severus reconsidered his previous thought that Shadow was still a fifteen-year-old boy. These weren't the thoughts of a teenager. The years spent in the coma had obviously aged him, maybe in a different way than it had the rest of them, but it had matured him nonetheless. "I admire your courage and your commitment to each other. I am happy for you."

"Then why were you sad if you're not disappointed in me?"

"Disappointed?" Severus considered that. "If I am disappointed, it is not disappointment in you. I was merely realizing that you are growing up. You were thirteen when you came to live with me. I wish I'd had more than two years to guide you."

Shadow stared, his mouth hanging open. It would never have occurred to him that Severus would _want_ to raise him. Not after the Dursleys who had abhorred that task. "I'm _always_ going to need your guidance." He laughed at the sheer absurdity that anyone would think otherwise. "While Remus was examining me, Sirius was there. He was so excited. I could feel it shining out of his skin. Remus, too. I trust them both, but… I still felt uncomfortable with them near me. If Draco hadn't been right beside me, I don't think I could have handled it. I… The fear… Boy's fear… It's still inside me. I'm calm when I'm with you and Draco, but I’m terrified of other people. Even Remus and Sirius. And I’m terrified of leaving the house.”

“Shadow…” Severus said softly, heart aching for his son.

“I don't want to live that way, but I don't know how to get rid of it!” Shadow interrupted. He was breathing hard. His posture was so tense, Severus was afraid he’d snap.

Severus stood and sat next to the young man, pulling him into his side. "We will get through this. I promise."

Shadow sort of cramped into his father’s side. "Told you I need you. And even if I didn't, I love you, Severus." He lifted his face to stare into his father's eyes. "I'm always going to want you with me."

"Good," Severus answered roughly, tightening his hold. "Because I couldn't imagine letting you go now.”

_~ Monday, March 12th ~_

Hermione took a deep breath and stepped forward. Green flames immediately enveloped her. It'd been years since she had used the floo. She expected difficulties, but she stepped smoothly from her arrival fireplace as if she'd been doing so every day.

Lifting her head, her eyes landed on Mrs. Weasley's face. The older woman opened her arms invitingly, a tender smile softening her features. Hermione, heart kicking faster, walked into those arms, careful not to bump the sling that rested across her chest.

"What happened, child?" Molly whispered fiercely, disturbed by the bruising on the girl's face and her injured arm.

"I'm ready to talk about Ron now," Hermione replied hoarsely.

Molly pulled back to look down into her face. "I would love to hear about Ron, dear."

Tearfully, Hermione allowed the mother of her best friend to lead her to the couch. Molly fussed over the tea and pushed biscuits in her direction. Hermione thanked her, but she made no move to eat or drink. In a soft hush voice, she began to explain herself.

"I was so mad at him. How dare he sacrifice himself for me? I would never have asked him to do so." She took a deep breath, trying to keep her composure. "I couldn't stand magic anymore. Magic had allowed him to do such a stupid thing. Magic had betrayed me. Had taken someone precious from me.”

"Sweetheart…" Molly put a compassionate hand on her knee.

Hermione ducked her head and described her retreat into a Muggle University. How everyday was difficult to get through unless she forced herself to think of nothing else outside of day to day things. She tried to erase Hogwarts for her memory, but no matter how hard she tried the dreams would come and some days she couldn't get out of bed no matter what she did.

"Then I met Dudley."

Molly frowned. The name sounded familiar.

"Harry's cousin," Hermione explained.

"That dreadful boy? Did he do this to you?"

Hermione nodded. "He hated magical people more than ever before since the Death Eaters murdered his parents. He was the one to find their bodies. It seems the Aurors who arrived to make it appear like a suicide forgot to alter his memories. Dudley tried to insist it was murder, but the Muggle authorities refused to believe it was anything more than a tragedy and the raving of a grieving young son. With no recourse, Dudley let the matter drop, but privately he swore vengeance on all wizardkind."

Horrified, Molly whispered, "What did he do?"

"He moved from University to University looking for suspicious people. Those with not enough magic to be successful in the Wizarding world or those Muggleborns who wanted to go to school in both worlds. He abducted them and tortured them for information about Harry. Then he killed them."

Molly covered her mouth, eyes wide.

"I was his eighth victim. Before he could do too much damage, his roommate at the time walked in and found us. A fight ensued and Dudley was killed. His journal was found, which explained everything I've just told you. The Muggles didn't believe the part about magic and just put it down to Dudley being insane."

"Oh, honey, I'm so sorry." Molly hugged her tight. "I'm so glad you're okay."

"When he attacked me… my magic stopped him. I… I hadn't used it in years. I was convinced I had given it up, but it was still there." Hermione began to cry softly. "I was so terrified. It made me realize… I don't want to die. I just want Ron back."

Molly cooed soothingly, stroking her hair.

"I'm glad I'm alive," Hermione admitted. "That used to make me feel so guilty, but now I feel gratitude as I should have from the beginning. I would trade my life for Ron's in a heartbeat, so I guess I can't be mad that he felt the same way. He was r-really b-brave and b-beautiful. I l-loved him so m-much."

The two women clung to each other while Hermione broke down and sobbed.

**xXx**

Draco moved downstairs from the dueling room. He was scowling because the stupid werewolf couldn't say for sure what the changes Seraphim had wrought would mean. He wasn't exactly a vampire anymore, but he wasn't wholly human either. Draco hated the uncertainty.

Draco knocked impatiently on the new guest room door – with the Blacks and Lupins visiting so often, they needed more than the single room upstairs, which Draco had taken to use when he wasn't with Shadow, so they turned Severus's old sitting room into another small guest room downstairs. The parlor now served as sitting room and parlor both.

Draco waited for an invitation to enter before stepping through. "How are you? I apologize for hurting you."

"Oh, I'm fine," Sirius assured. He stood from the desk in the corner and came forward to hug the tall blond. "It would take more than a knock to the head to get rid of old Sirius."

Draco smiled back but then folded his features into a serious mask. "I have come to request permission from my Head of Family to be wed."

"Wed?" Sirius blinked and then a slow grin split his face. "Shouldn't you be asking me as a godfather for permission to wed my godson?"

"No." Draco knelt gracefully. "My hand was requested by one Shadow Snape. I put forward that my chosen mate is worthy in many respects, including power and demeanor, and his name is as honorable as that of Black."

Sirius gaped. _Shadow_ had asked _Draco_? Then he shook himself and turned his attention to the ritual Draco had begun. "I am cognizant of Shadow Snape's accomplishments, but is his Family worthy of the addition of the Black bloodline? I give you permission to bring him before me so that I may weigh his request for your hand duly."

"Thank you, Lord Black. I submit myself to your wisdom."

Sirius nodded and offered Draco a hand up. The blond took it. "Now that that's done, tell me how this came about!"

"He asked me when he woke up tonight." Draco ginned almost shyly. "I admit I was just as shocked."

"I bet." Sirius laughed and slung an arm around Draco's shoulders. "I thought you'd be doing the asking, not the other way around. Though, it's the smartest thing Shadow's ever done, if you ask me. I don't think I'd let you go for anyone else. You are a credit to this family and the Blacks could use more honorable people in its ranks."

Draco flushed, surprised by the honest affection Sirius was displaying. He'd had no idea the older man felt that way about him. "Thank you."

"I can't get over him asking you." Sirius slanted him a playful glance. "Are you sure you can't do this thing over? I've been trying to make Shadow a Black for ages, and it has a better ring to it than Draco Snape."

Draco shook his head, amused. "Sorry, Sirius, but it's been done and I wouldn't change it for the world."

Sirius sighed dramatically. "Well, you'd better bring him to me, so we can finish this."

"I'll present him tomorrow night, then." Draco bowed low to his Head of Family and gracefully left the room. He had a lot to explain to his fiancé, but he didn't think Shadow would mind. His lover was more likely to see the Pureblood traditions as a game. Draco grinned; this would be fun.

**xXx**

_~ Tuesday, March 13th ~_

"Under the rainbow we clap, clap, clap, as the Bailiwick tap-tap. Dancing, twirling, with a leg unfurling…"

"Luna… What are you doing?" Ginny stared up at her friend who was climbing a tree.

Luna sat and hooked her legs around the sturdy branch under her and swung backward so she was upside down, her face inches from the redhead's. "I'm singing."

"Yes. I can hear that." Ginny flicked her nose. "It's time for dinner. Did you go to any classes today?"

"I don't believe so, but I've been distracted by alternative methods," Luna answered dreamily, swinging gently, her long hair sweeping the courtyard stones.

"Luna…" Ginny growled. "Can you please try and not fail our final year?"

"Hmmm." The little Ravenclaw reached up and wrapped her arms around the young oak and dropped gracefully to the floor. "You're right. We should go."

"You think?" Ginny snapped sarcastically. "I swear. What would you do without me?"

Luna pondered this question silently while they walked but could find no satisfactory answer. "What would a moth do without a flame?"

"What?" Ginny had forgotten the original question by now, but there was no time for clarification. Just as they rounded the corner, the Great Hall doors in sight, Deputy Headmistress Vector stepped off the staircase.

"Miss Weasley. I was looking for you. Could you follow me, please?"

Ginny shot her friend a look. The blonde merely smiled sweetly. She turned back to her teacher. "Can Luna come?"

Professor Vector eyed the strange girl. "Very well. Come along both of you, then."

"You know what's going on," Ginny whispered as they made their way to the Headmistress's Tower.

"Hmmm," Luna hummed again. "Maybe you're being summoned by a Bailiwick. Their population has greatly increased lately."

"Luna!" Ginny hissed and slapped her arm. "Focus. Speak English. What's going on? I have a bad feeling about this."

"Hush," her friend soothed. "Bailiwick's aren't deadly."

"There are worse things than death," Ginny murmured.

"What was that?" Professor Vector asked as they stopped at the gargoyle.

"Nothing," Ginny denied. "Do you know what this is about?"

"I'm sure Headmistress McGonagall will inform you. Up you go."

Ginny and Luna said nothing else as they traveled up the spiral staircase and stepped into Minerva's office. The older woman looked happy for once as she waved them to the two chairs before her massive desk. Ginny sat gingerly. She could think of no reason why the Headmistress would need to talk to her. She wasn't the one skipping classes. With this thought, she glared at Luna who didn't notice as she was busy petting the chair she was supposed to be sitting in. The Headmistress ignored the Ravenclaw completely, her attention focused on Ginny, making the young woman squirm.

"Your mother has contacted me and wishes you to return home tonight for dinner due to an important family guest," Minerva informed her formally but was unable to hide her smile completely. "You have permission to leave. If you wish to stay the night, please do return before class tomorrow."

Ginny nodded, her mouth gone dry. Her mother never took them out of school. Education always came first. Therefore, she knew the guest could only be one of two people. She was hoping hard it wasn't a certain bushy-haired ex-Gryffindor. She wasn't sure she was ready to see that deserter yet.

Luna gently clasped her friend's hand and towed her to the fireplace. It would be best to get this done quickly before the redhead could work up to a full head of steam. Luna loved when things came together. It was like a song. She _loved_ songs.

Grabbing the floo powder, Luna threw it down enthusiastically. "The Burrow!"

Ginny didn't resist as she was pushed into the emerald flames. She was almost numb to the spinning sensation. When she stepped into her living room, Molly was waiting for her.

Her mother smiled and squeezed her tight. "How are you, dear?"

"I'm fine," Ginny pulled away, her eyes searching the room, but it was empty. The house was strangely quiet.

"She's in the kitchen helping your father set the table." Molly held her daughter's gaze levelly. "Now, I know you have some things to say to Hermione, but I want you to understand that this hasn't been easy for her, either."

Ginny felt her expression harden.

Molly patted her daughter on the shoulder and led her to the kitchen.

**xXx**

Dinner had been horrible. Arthur and Molly were too kind. Their attention was a bit smothering and the way they mentioned Ron so casually and without warning was like stepping on a landmine unexpectedly. Hermione ran a shaking hand through her bushy hair, knowing the real challenge lay before her. She wanted to run home, feeling exhausted, but she couldn't. Not again. As hard as this was going to be, running would be worse.

Pushing the back door open, Hermione stepped out onto the porch. Ginny stood at the rail, just out of reach of the light spilling from the open door and the back windows. She knew the redhead wasn't happy with her due to the fact that Ginny hadn't spoken a single word all during dinner.

Hermione hadn't been able to really look at her while they ate, afraid to meet her eyes, but with Ginny's back turned, she was able to take her time and notice the differences. Ginny was obviously no longer the young, flirtatious girl with long gorgeous hair and pink lipstick. This new Ginny was tall, muscled, and her hair was cropped efficiently short.

"What are you doing here, really?"

Hermione jumped, startled from her thoughts. "I… I didn't do things right… back then. I'm trying to fix that."

"I see." Ginny turned and faced her with cold eyes. "Then you can go now. Nothing can fix what you did."

Hermione paled, acid guilt eating her insides. "I'm sorry, Ginny. I know how hard it must have been for you…"

"You know _nothing_ ," she hissed, stepping aggressively forward, fists clenched.

Hermione couldn't hold her gaze. "Maybe the better question isn't what I want, but what you want."

Ginny snorted. She turned her back and went to the rail again. She said nothing.

"Do you really want me to leave and never come back? ... Because I will."

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" Ginny snarled, still facing away.

"I don't know what I'd like. I haven't been happy in a long time. I think I've forgotten the feeling."

Ginny spun on her heel and slapped her hard across the face. "You _stupid_ … Ron died for you! He _died_. For you. And what did you do? You threw away your friends, your life, your magic. You bloody well spat in his face, is what you did! You made his sacrifice _worthless_ ," she snarled, voice ugly. "Ron deserved better from you."

Hermione's knees gave out and she sank to the ground, hand cradling her cheek. Tears burned her skin as they fell. "You're right. I wasn't worth it. I really wasn't. I would trade places with him, but I can't. It's over. It's too late. I can't stop time. I can't run away from my life without betraying him. I get that now." She covered her face and began to cry. "I just don't know what to do without him."

Ginny wanted to rail some more. She had years of anger built up inside, stored for this moment, but as she stared down at Hermione, the girl’s face bruised, arm injured and in a sling, expression so broken, she felt herself softening.

"Ron devoted his life to you and Harry. He had no other close friends. No one knew him the way my family did. Except you two. And Harry… Well, he left. To be Shadow. And you left. It was like Ron was dead all over again. His impact on the world was erased. He left no one and nothing behind except family."

Hermione cried harder.

"You are his legacy. You have to do better. Live harder, brighter. You're living for two." Ginny crouched and pulled her into her arms. "I'm glad you're back. I'm still mad as hell that you waited so long, but I'm glad you're back."

Molly turned from the window with a teary smile on her face.

"Are they okay?" Arthur asked, pulling his wife into his arms.

"They will be now," Molly answered and let him guide her into the living room, a heavy weight lifted from her shoulders. "You know that trip you were talking about… How about Egypt? We could see Bill."

Arthur laughed and kissed his wife's cheek. "Sounds wonderful."

**xXx**

_~ Wednesday, March 14 ~_

Draco woke curled around his lover. Stretching, he cupped Shadow's bottom and pulled him closer. The head of curly black hair rolled perfectly into the crook of his neck. Practically purring, Draco went lax, drifting back on the edge of sleep.

Shadow smiled sleepily, feeling safe and content as Draco's warmth and strength surrounded him. He hated weakness, despised his own with a passion, but somehow it was okay to relax with Draco. It was okay to be protected in his arms.

"Too early to think," Draco murmured, voice thick with sleep. He lifted his hand and brushed his thumb gently over Shadow's forehead and the crinkles there. They smoothed under his touch and Shadow sighed. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing. Really," Shadow insisted when Draco frowned. He sat up, yawning, before crawling to the edge of the bed.

"Where're you going?"

"Shower. It's almost dark."

Draco grinned wickedly as he waited for a moment and then followed his fiancé. He stripped off his pajamas and opened the shower door, planning on pleasuring his love and starting the night off right.

Lost in thought, Shadow jumped when he heard the stall open behind him. Terror griped him with a cold, clawed hand. With soap in his eyes, he couldn't see who the intruder was. His back slammed against the tiled wall and his hands came up, a thin, strangled scream rising from his throat.

"Shit," Draco hissed as he instantly dropped to his knees just outside the shower. "Shadow, love, it's just me. You're safe. I wouldn't let anyone hurt you. No one can get to you here. You're home, baby. You're with me. Shhh, it's all right. I've got you."

Shadow sank to the floor, sobbing and shaking in reaction. Soaking wet, half covered in suds, he felt Draco's arms come around him. He whimpered and clung, feeling stupid but so damn grateful that his lover was there. He was sick of feeling afraid. The cold, sharp feeling made him sick to his stomach, but he couldn't help it. He _was_ scared. Scared of a lot of things, actually.

Draco continued to murmur as he rinsed his love clean. Despite his gentle manner, inside he was raging. How could he be so bloody stupid? "I'm sorry, baby. I won't do that again. I'm so, so sorry."

Shadow pulled away, a still trembling hand rubbing at his eyes. "I'm okay." He stood on his own, ignoring Draco's hand. He shut off the water, his head bowed so he didn't have to look at Draco's face.

Draco let him evade him long enough to get a towel around his waist and another around his shoulders, then he stepped forward and lifted his chin. "I love you. We'll get through this. You've been through a lot and just woke up. Give yourself time. Give _me_ time."

Shadow nodded. "I'm going to get dressed. If we don't hurry, we're going to miss dinner."

Draco let him go. When he was alone, he spun and punched the wall. Tiles cracked. The pain in his knuckles was a welcome punishment.

**xXx**

"I should be getting back home if I am no longer needed," Remus said kindly, smiling at both Shadow and Draco after a pleasant dinner. He'd watched Draco eat carefully. It looked like the blond could consume meat now without difficulty. He wondered what it could mean and made Draco promise to keep a detailed record of any further differences in his condition.

"Actually, before we go, can you come with me to talk in the parlor?" Sirius suggested with uncharacteristic solemnity.

Severus, unlike Remus, knew what this was about. His expression remained neutral, but inside he was smirking, getting a kick over Black being unable to yet again pull Shadow into his family. Shadow laughed quietly under his breath. Severus winked, knowing his son had peeked at him with his empathy.

Remus looked suspiciously between everyone in the room, but when he got no answers, he made his way to the designated room.

"Shall we?" Draco asked as Sirius and Severus followed the werewolf.

Shadow placed his hand in the one offered. "Yes. Although I think this is silly."

"The forms must be seen to."

"Whatever you say, Serpentine." Shadow shook his head ruefully. He couldn't say he didn't know what he was getting into asking a traditionalist like Draco to marry him.

They entered the sitting room to find Remus on the couch staring up at Sirius who stood in the middle of the room, straight-backed, hands clasped behind him. Severus stood in a dark corner, but he was also watching the man.

Draco smoothly knelt before his Head of Family. "I have come as requested, Lord Black, to present to you, Shadow Snape, who has asked for my hand in marriage."

Remus gasped, Severus smirked, and Shadow was surprised to feel an aggressive growl wanting to rise from his throat. The instincts of his Animagus did not like his mate kneeling to _anyone_ else. Thankfully, he was in his human form and was able to, barely, keep himself in check. He hoped this went quickly.

"You believe this match to be auspicious?" Sirius asked. "To whom? Yourself or your family?"

"Both, Lord. Shadow holds my affection, but the Snapes would also make strong allies to the Black family."

Sirius nodded. "Who speaks for the Snapes?"

Shadow knew this was his cue. Draco had told him last night what he'd need to say. "I do," he answered tightly, still trying to suppress his magic.

"You give your word the Snapes will henceforth ally with the Black should I bless this union?"

"I give it."

"And will you honor Draco Black as he should be honored?"

"I will."

Sirius grinned. "Then I give my blessing to you both. May our families prosper together."

Draco smiled and bowed his head to receive the final blessing.

Sirius reached forward to clasp the back of Draco's neck.

Shadow's control snapped. He took an aggressive step forward, a snarl curling his lip. Magic whipped wildly around him, tossing a chair over and a vase of flowers to the floor. Luckily it wasn't Black magic. Shadow only had access to the higher magics in his Animagus form.

Still, Draco could feel the resonance of Seraphim in Shadow's growl. His head snapped up. Seeing the heated two-colored glare on Sirius, Draco jumped to his feet and pulled Shadow into his arms, whispering soothingly.

Sirius blinked, shocked at the display. After a moment, however, he understood and smiled sheepishly, rubbing the back of his head. He was an Animagus, too, after all. "Sorry. I know he's yours."

Shadow blushed. Now that Draco was on his feet and next to him he felt ridiculous. "No. It's my fault." He looked to his father who was watching calmly, without judgment. "I'm sorry for the mess."

"It is repairable; it's of no consequence." Severus denied the apology with an unconcerned wave of his hand.

"Really, it's fine," Sirius agreed. "In any case, I give you all the blessings in the world. Be married and be happy."

Shadow smiled. "Thanks, Siri, Dad."

"And thank you for allowing me to witness this. I'm so happy for you two. Congratulations!" Remus bowed deeply, knowing better than to try and hug either young man right now. "You'll have to let us known the date and location."

Shadow glanced at Draco and got an encouraging nod in return. "I'd like the ceremony to take place at dawn on the 23rd of this month."

"That's rather soon, Shadow," Severus remarked, speaking the thoughts of the other shocked men in the room.

Shadow shrugged. "I don't see any reason to wait. It's not going to be difficult to plan, since it's going to be a really small and private ceremony."

"Then we will see it done," Sirius vowed.

Severus nodded, while Remus smiled, saying, "I hope I may bring my wife and son."

"Of course. We'll send you invitations with a portkey to the location as soon as possible," Draco answered proudly.

Shadow smiled and clasped his hand. He was pleased his lover was enjoying this so much.

Draco looked down at him. "Come on, love. I have something I want to show you."

The two left the room hand-in-hand. Shadow was still embarrassed with his aggressive outburst, so his thoughts were occupied with how he was going to get control of his unstable emotions. The slightest thing had him spinning out of control. He was so lost in thought that he didn't notice Draco was taking him outside until he felt the cool night breeze on his face.

Shadow froze and grabbed Draco's arm tightly. He felt exposed and his heart beat quickened while his eyes darted around looking for threats. He teetered on the verge of a flashback: graveyard torment, backyard abuse from his uncle, or the trauma of the final battle.

"I got you," Draco soothed. He wrapped an arm around his lover's waist and pulled him close. "It's not far. Trust me."

Shadow nodded and forced himself to breathe evenly. There was nothing to be afraid of. They were alone, and Draco was there to help him if anything happened. The Dark Lord was dead, and so were all the Death Eaters and the Dursleys. He was safe. _Stay calm. Keep breathing,_ he coached himself.

Draco walked slowly into the woods below the house. A breeze stirred the branches and he smiled, knowing they were whispering of their arrival into a certain Earth elemental's ears. Shadow was oblivious, attention focused inward. A few minutes later they stepped into a small clearing with a single young oak tree standing in the middle. Immediately, the tree shrank rapidly, as if time were running in reverse, until the outline of a man could be seen.

Neville blinked and stepped forward, his eyes riveted on his long-lost brother.

Shadow instinctively brought up his magic, not recognizing the haggard man approaching. The calm he'd won was completely gone again. He clutched at Draco's arm fiercely, his breath rasping through his suddenly tight throat.

"It's only Nev," Draco whispered into his ear.

"Nev!" Shadow repeated, shocked. "Neville Longbottom? … Is that you?"

The tall man with broad shoulders and muscled arms smiled. "It's been a long time."

The voice was deeper but still familiar and Shadow's fear disappeared completely. He ran forward and flung his arms around the third person he trusted completely. "My god! Neville! You look so different. I was expecting you to look the same as in my dreams."

Neville held him tight. "I missed you."

"Yeah. Me, too." Shadow pulled back but still kept a hold of Neville's hand. "So much has happened. Tell me what you've been up to. Draco told me I've been dreaming for three years."

Neville considered the question. It had been a long time since he'd tried to put things into human words. "I explore my Earth magic."

Shadow waited for more, but nothing was forthcoming. Slowly, he realized that more than just Neville's appearance had changed. He was tall, taller than even Draco's six foot height. He was leanly muscled with not an ounce of fat on his body. Despite the nights still being cold, spring not quite arrived in full, his brother stood barefoot. His clothes were dirty and worn, his hair falling in a thick, tangled mess to his broad shoulders. However, the biggest difference was in his eyes. They saw him but also looked through him.

Shadow glanced quickly over at Draco, but the blond merely shook his head helplessly. Desperate to know if Neville was still the same person who stood up to their abuser, the one who accepted him for who he was, and shared his own secrets and broken psyche, Shadow opened up his empathy and held the strange dark gaze.

Neville was still there, filled with the same kindness and gentle strength as Shadow remembered, but he was softened around the edges, as if he were unraveling bit by bit and being filled with something too vast for Shadow to comprehend. Shivering, Shadow quickly ran through his options. He wanted Neville to come back. They had missed so much time already.

"Maybe you can help me," he said slowly, his two-colored eyes narrowed thoughtfully.

"Anything," Neville promised, speaking equally slowly as if their words had to transverse a great distance before they were heard.

"I asked Draco to marry me. Tonight Sirius gave us his permission. You'll help me plan, won't you? You'll be my best man?"

Neville blinked, his eyes sparkling with a bit more human warmth. "Congratulations. I'd love to help."

Shadow glanced around the clearing, ignoring Draco's curious expression. "This looks like a nice place. We could have the ceremony here."

"What?" Draco stared.

"Don't you like it?" Shadow asked anxiously, biting his lip. He was so focused on trying to keep Neville's attention that he forgot to consider Draco's opinion in the matter. "It's close to home but still private."

"It's fine," Draco reassured and bent down to place a kiss on Shadow's cheek. "I just thought you'd want to do it somewhere more exotic."

"No. I'm not ready to go too far from home." Shadow lowered his head in shame, but he knew his limits and wasn't stupid enough to push at them too hard too quickly. "But I do want it to be somewhere special."

"Then I love it." Draco pulled him close and kissed him warmly on the lips.

Neville lifted both eyebrows in surprise. Draco often roamed these woods when about to be overcome by bloodlust. He would have thought the blond would associate the place with dark feelings and violent desires. Then again, he wasn't surprised that Draco would give in to whatever Shadow wanted.

"So you'll help?"

Neville blinked. "Yes. I already said I would." Neville would just have to make sure the clearing was so spectacularly decorated that Draco would no longer see it as the place of the past. "Can Draco come out at dawn?"

"Looks like it. I changed his condition somehow with both Black and White magic. So far he hasn't fallen into bloodlust since. He's still sleepy in the middle of the day, but he can stay awake past dawn for longer without too much effort, and he wakes before the sun sets."

"That is truly good news." Neville reached out and clasped the blond's shoulder. "I was disturbed by how much he has suffered these past years."

Shadow flushed, his fists clenching as guilt wormed through his gut. Draco wouldn't have had to suffer so long if he'd woken up sooner.

"Are you hungry, Neville?" Draco asked, quickly changing the subject, equally uncomfortable. "We could have a snack. Or you could come in and play a few games with us."

Neville considered, his eyes taking in the woods around them. He really didn't want to leave this place safe from human machinations and social politics.

"Please, Nev? It's been so long. I could use a good friend right now." Shadow ruffled his curls with a self-deprecating smile. "Now that all my alters have merged, I find myself a bit unstable. Having people around me that I trust helps keep my mind steady."

There was no way Neville could say no to that. "I will come."

Shadow smiled and grabbed his hand, squeezing it warmly. "Thank you," he whispered whole-heartedly. He had an idea of what he was asking Neville to leave behind.

The three of them walked slowly back toward the house. As the woods thinned, Neville's feet slowed but continued to move forward. The house came into view, the windows all lit up. The warm light welcomed them home despite the ramshackle exterior of the building.

Shadow's kept his sights on the house, refusing to glance around in paranoia as he felt his instincts urging him to do. It was as if there were hundreds of people hiding in the dark, their eyes trying to pierce his skin. Heart beating faster and faster, he practically dragged Neville and Draco to the door in record time. He didn't relax again until they were safely inside, the door firmly shut behind them.

Shadow smiled wryly up at them, aware of his craziness. "How about chess?"

Neville looked to Draco, slowly realizing that Shadow was far from perfectly healed. The blond wasn't looking at him, though. His attention was on his fiancé.

"I could play a game or two. I haven't had someone fresh to beat in a long time," Draco bantered, flashing a cocky grin.

Shadow laughed. "We'll see about that."

The two made their way upstairs and Neville smiled when Shadow turned to make sure he was following. It felt strange being inside without soil at his feet. He didn't think he could stay here long, but for now it was nice to listen to Shadow's voice, to watch Draco and him interact. They were obviously completely devoted to each other. It was reassuring that not all was lost. Some magic still remained.

**Chapter end.**


	4. Tenderness

**A/N:** It's my birthday! Let's celebrate together with a new chapter.

**Tenderness**

_~ Thursday, March 15 ~_

Shadow stared at the ceiling, his mind racing. It was in these quiet moments when he was alone that he could think the clearest. Neville had returned to the woods when Draco had grown sleepy a few hours past dawn. He had suggested they all get some sleep. Shadow didn't let Nev leave before getting a promise that he would come back at dusk – when they'd most likely wake up.

Draco was dead to the world, softly snoring with an arm wrapped around Shadow's waist. Shadow couldn't sleep. He'd done enough of that as it was. Besides, he really had a lot to consider. It was only now hitting him. He'd been in a coma for three _years_. The lives of everyone he knew had continued.

_And not for the better in some cases,_ he thought, looking down at his lover's profile.

Gently, Shadow pulled free of Draco's embrace. Shadow was wearing pajama pants, so he only bothered to slip on a long night robe before tip-toeing out of the room. He needn't have been so careful. Draco may not be suffering from the effects of vampirism anymore, but he still slept rather soundly when the sun was up. He made it to Draco's room without being discovered and shut the door carefully behind him.

"Omi!" he called.

"Yes, young Master?" The elf appeared almost instantly. His large blue eyes were brighter than they had been in years, almost distracting from his many wrinkles and white hair. It seemed like decades had passed since Shadow had seen him last instead of just a few years.

"Hi, Omi. Are you busy today?"

"Oh, no, young Master. I's not too busy to do something for you," Omi assured him, a large smile splitting his face. He bounced on his toes, he was so eager to help.

"I was wondering if you could go and find out some information for me. I know it's not what you usually do, but…"

"I can do it, Master! Omi need only know who," the elf cried.

"Well…" Shadow sat down on the bed, thinking. "George and Fred Weasley. Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley. Ginny Weasley and Luna Lovegood. Rogan Harper, Miles Bletchy, and Lillian… I forget her last name, but she is usually with the other two. Charlie and Bill Weasley. Minerva McGonagall." His mind slid to enemies instead of just friends. "Dolores Umbridge." He blinked. Was she the only enemy who was still alive? The thought brought a smile to his face.

"Is that all, sir?" Omi asked, brow scrunched as he tried to memorize the list.

"For now." Shadow smiled at him. "Thank you, Omi. It really means a lot to me."

Omi smiled back, true affection in his gaze. "I is very pleased to serve you, Master." With that, he disappeared with a crack.

Shadow shook his head but couldn't help feeling affection for the little guy. Omi was a part of the family. Unfortunately, the good mood didn't last. He bit his lip, suddenly nervous about the news the elf would bring back. From as far as he could see, Neville and Draco hadn't been doing well in his absence. Severus was the same as ever, if a little tired and rough around the edges. In fact, the only two who seemed to have thrived were Sirius, who looked better than ever, and Remus, who had a wife and son he adored.

The minutes passed slowly. Shadow had no idea how long it would take for Omi to gather information about all the people he'd asked about, so he stood and began to pace. He needed to think of something to do about Neville. His brother had obviously relinquished some of his humanity. Was there a way to get Neville to take it back, or could all he hope for was to stall Neville’s inevitable transition into becoming Earth? No matter, he had to try.

Shadow moved to the desk in the corner. He pulled out a piece of parchment and an Ever-Quill and began jotting down notes and ideas concerning Neville. These thoughts transitioned to thoughts of the wedding, since most of his plan revolved around Neville helping him with it. They needed to go shopping for formal robes. Shadow smiled, knowing Draco would love _that_ outing at least. The quill stopped in mid-word. Could he actually go out and shop? The idea of a crowd, of strangers watching him, maybe even brushing up against him, had a cold sweat breaking out along his hair line and the blood rushing from his head.

"Shit," he cursed, fisting his hands. He _really_ didn't want _anyone_ touching him. He about jumped out of his skin when Draco surprised him in the shower the other night.

Sheer overwhelming despair washed through him. What was he going to do with the rest of his life? He could hardly step outside the front door. The thought of a shopping trip made him want to curl up in the corner and whimper. Even if he could walk around freely, he wasn't qualified to do anything. He hadn't even graduated from Hogwarts. Now that he thought about it, neither had Draco. They couldn't just live off of Severus. The man looked worn down. Severus needed a break, not more responsibility. Besides, Draco had turned eighteen last June. Shadow Snape technically turned eighteen last month. It was time for them to support themselves.

"Yeah, but doing what?" he muttered, running a hand roughly through his messy curls. Luckily, His increasingly agitated thoughts were disrupted by the loud return of Omi.

"I have news, sir."

Shadow hesitated but then nodded. "What'd you find out?"

"I talked to the elves at Hogwarts, sir. They knew all those you wanted to hear about." Omi looked rather pleased with himself that he had learned about each name his Master had given him.

"Good job, Omi," Shadow praised him, grinning at the way it made Omi squirm.

"Fred Weasley died a few days after the war, sir. George Weasley hasn't been seen much. He stays at home. Hermione Granger disappeared after Ron Weasley traded his life for hers using a very big spell. He's now a great hero."

Shadow felt his heart squeeze in his chest at the horrible news. Fred and Ron dead? Hermione missing? George a shut in? Omi continued oblivious to his distress.

"Ginny Weasley, Luna Lovegood, Rogan Harper, Miles Bletchy, and Lillian Derrick are in their last year of school and will graduate this June. Tibby says Ginny Weasley wants to be a mighty Auror and that Rogan has proposed to both Miles Bletchy and Lillian Derrick. They will be the first Triad formed in fifteen years."

"That's good," Shadow sighed in relief.

"Miles Bletchy might not live to the wedding. It's set in May. His bone disease has made him very weak and sick, sir," Omi reported sadly. "The elves are very sad. Miles Bletchy is always kind to them."

Shadow gritted his teeth and waved the elf on.

"Charlie Weasley died in the final battle at Hogwarts. Bill Weasley was infected with the werewolf virus, but since he was bitten during the day and not on a full moon he does not change every month. It merely altered his physical appearance and heightened his senses. He and his wife have tried to make young ones, but they think the disease has rendered him infertile. Minerva McGonagall is Headmistress and is doing well. She is dating a Mr. Young."

"And Umbridge?" he whispered, overwhelmed.

"Dolores Umbridge is missing since the final battle, but the elves know, sir." Omi shifted uncomfortably. "I's not wanting to get anyone in trouble."

"You won't. I'll keep it secret," Shadow promised, all his attention on the elf. Dark rage stirred in his breast. So much lost, so many lives ruined. Umbridge would pay for her contribution to that if she hadn't already.

"Young Draco Black killed her, sir, and gave her body to the centaurs," Omi answered weakly. He held his breath, expecting anger.

Shadow blinked and then threw his head back and laughed. He laughed so hard that tears slid down his cheeks. It took several minutes to catch his breath. "Oh, Omi, that's the best news you've given me."

Omi smiled tentatively back. "Can I do anything else for you, young Master?"

"No. No, you've done enough." Still chuckling and wiping his eyes, Shadow shook his head. "Thank you."

"You are welcome, sir." Omi hesitated before leaving. "Can I get you lunch? It is noon, Master."

Shadow wasn't hungry, but he knew he should eat even if it was only to try and gain back some weight. "I'll have a sandwich and some milk."

"Yes, sir!" Omi cried happily. "Right away, sir!"

Shadow ate his sandwich slowly, his mind trying to wrap around everything he'd been told. It actually took effort to turn his thoughts away from those who'd died and focus on those he could still help. Not that they'd want his help, maybe. He'd abandoned them, after all. Still, Shadow had to do something to at least atone for his long absence. The question was what could he do to help?

**xXx**

Draco woke to find the bed empty and the red-gold light of sunset spilling in through the window. Stretching, he got up and padded across the room in search of his wayward fiancé. A sixth sense drew him to his bedroom. Pushing the door open, he found his lover staring outside the window with ink-stained fingers and a thoughtful look on his face. Several pieces of parchment were balled up at his feet.

"Hey, lover. Miss me?" he called softly, not wanting to startle the beautiful man.

The two-colored eyes focused on him and Draco felt a rush knowing he had Shadow's full attention. He didn't think he'd ever get tired of it or the sweet welcoming smile that spread across his lover's face.

"Good evening," Shadow answered and lifted a hand in welcome, gesturing him over. "Tell me what you think about this."

But Draco wasn't having any of _that_. He wanted Shadow's attention on _him_ , not some new project, whatever it was. That could come later. His attempt at seduction in the bathroom had failed, but he was determined to succeed this time. He let a smirk slide across his lips. Shadow's brow furrowed minutely, still unaware he was being stalked.

Draco strode slowly across the floor, letting his hips sway with each step, knowing his pants would slip just enough to reveal his hipbones. "I asked if you missed me, Shadow," he reminded, his voice turning into a velvet purr.

Shadow's glorious eyes widened and he visibly swallowed. Draco's mind instantly flashed to fantasies of Shadow swallowing around _him_ , and he felt his pulse speed up, the raw hunger doubling. He wanted Shadow under him writhing, eyes clouded with lust, voice crying out his pleasure. He wanted it so badly he could literally taste it.

Draco lifted his hand and slowly ran it through his silky hair, tilting his head into the caress and exposing his throat. He parted his lips, his tongue slowly wetting them. "I missed _you_."

Shadow couldn't take his eyes off his lover's gorgeous body, suddenly hyperaware that they were both half-naked. "Draco…" he gasped out.

"Yes?" the blond answered huskily. His hand fell from his head to trail down his chest. Both pink nipples hardened as his fingers ran smoothly, slowly down his skin. His stomach muscles tightened at the tickling sensation, and his pants were obviously tented by the time he traced over his hip and down his clothed thigh.

Shadow felt his heart beating deep and steady in his chest, his whole being riveted on Draco. He could feel the heat his mate's body gave off, sense his arousal and deep-seated love, could hear his quickening breaths, and Shadow could smell the warm scent that was uniquely Draco. It saturated the room, wrapped around him, and filled his lungs with every breath. Every nerve ending came alive, sending tingling pleasure dancing along his skin, a promise of what was to come.

Draco thrilled as Shadow's eyes darkened with lust. _He_ was doing this to his love. Only he could make Shadow tremble with desire. He closed the distance between them. One hand on either side of the chair braced against the desk, Draco bent forward, his mouth right against his lover's ear. "So do you miss me?" he whispered.

Shadow answered with a gasp.

Draco chuckled and let his lips trail down, across the sharp jaw, sliding smoothly to the pointed chin. He licked upward, brushing the full bottom lip that was silently begging to be kissed. "I love you," he murmured gently. He looked up and held Shadow's bright eyes. "Can't get enough of you. Need you."

Shadow couldn't take it anymore. One hand snaked out and grasped the back of Draco's neck, pulling his head down roughly. Their mouths collided, sharp pain flared through Shadow's lip and the coppery taste of blood flavored the heated kiss. Draco growled and practically shoved his tongue forward, his eyes turning into glowing silver discs.

Whimpering, Shadow scrapped his nails down Draco’s muscled stomach, his fingers catching on the waist band of Draco's pants. He yanked his lover's hips forward, arching his own, desperate for more contact, but the angle wasn't right, their skin still wasn't touching.

Draco dropped both hands to Shadow's slender waist and lifted. Long legs wrapped responsively around him while lean arms wrapped around his shoulders and neck. Their chests pressed flush against each other, their hearts communing through rapid Morse code. They bit and kissed and sucked, moans and gasps swallowed whole. Then Draco felt the thighs encircling him tighten as Shadow rocked against his stomach. Through their pants Draco felt the cool slickness of pre-cum and thought he'd combust with desire.

Shadow's back hit the wall hard. His mouth broke free as he cried out, hands clawing at Draco's shoulders as the blond pressed against his aching need and rubbed deliberately against him. Shadow stared into Draco's hungry eyes with equal fervor. It occurred to him that they had won. They had beaten all the odds and survived the war, out-lived their enemies, and would now be together forever. Shadow grinned, breathless and exhilarated. Draco groaned, equally winded and dropped his head to lick and bite at Shadow's neck and shoulder.

_So alive, so good, hot, more, need more…_ Shadow's fevered mind babbled.

As if reading his thoughts, Draco bit down hard on Shadow’s neck, sucking at the tender spot above the pulse point, making Shadow cry out loudly. His mind chanted his lover’s name … _Shadow, Shadow, Shadow…_ as Draco pulled his lover's pants off his smooth arse and away from his weeping erection. The silk bunched at the top of milky thighs, trapped there by Draco's body and the legs wrapped around his waist.

Shadow gasped as he rubbed against Draco's hot skin and reveled in the overwhelming wave of physical and emotional sensations as Draco groaned and rocked, granting him the friction he desperately needed. Wet kisses stole his breath; strong steadying hands grounded him; the sharp bites sent electric shocks straight to his nipples and groin.

_So close, so close…_

"Love you… Love you…" Draco chanted. He was almost blind with need. Shadow was undulating against him, rhythmically squeezing his waist as he rutted against Draco's body, practically _mewling_ … Draco groaned and quickly licked the first two fingers of his right hand. He slid them over the pale cheek and gently pushed up into the tight entrance.

"Ah!" Shadow flung his head back hard, his curls sticking to his sweat-soaked forehead.

Draco froze, his whole body locking in fear. Had he hurt him?

"Don't stop! Don't stop!" Shadow cried out desperately, fists pounding on the blond's shoulders.

A hungry smile stretched Draco's mouth as he rubbed languidly up against his lover, teasing the cock trapped between them. "Did you like that, baby?"

Shadow narrowed his eyes even as he groaned in pleasure. His fogged mind was scrambled, but he knew he was being challenged. He was no passive participant in this. The mere idea made Lockhart flash in front of his eyes. He growled and grabbed a fistful of Draco's hair, tilting his head back. He licked across the swollen lips, wetly across his cheek, over to the shell of Draco’s ear.

" _Do_ ** _you_** _like it?"_ he hissed wantonly, using Parseltongue. _"Feels so good, doesn't it, Draco? Never wanna stop. You're_ ** _mine_** _. Only I can touch you now."_

Draco gasped, eyes hazed over. All coherent thought fled and primal lust took over. He slammed his two fingers into that tight heat, desperate to claim, to mark, to give himself, and be taken.

Shadow howled, his nails sinking into skin, unknowingly drawing small bloody furrows.

Sloppily, Draco pushed his fingers in and out, spreading them, stretching the tight ring of muscle. He wouldn't last much longer. Shadow's scent was covering him, the gorgeous body clinging to and grinding against his own. The hitching, desperate little gasps his lover was making told him Shadow was going to fall over the edge any minute. He pressed forward, pinning him to the wall, stopping the friction.

"No! Draco! Almost there, _almost there_!" Shadow dropped his sweaty forehead against Draco's shoulder, almost crying in frustration.

"Hold on, sweetheart," he gasped. "Wait for me."

Draco pulled his fingers out and yanked his own pants down. Grasping his cock, he pressed it at his lover's entrance. He couldn't catch his breath. He was panting, mouth open, heart almost bursting out of his chest. He rocked his hips upward, slowly impaling himself. Shadow howled in both pain and pleasure. There was barely any lubrication, a pitiful amount of Draco’s spit, and he was barely stretched, but the look on Draco's face - eyes wild, cheeks red, mouth gasping for oxygen, staring at him like he was some amazing being - was incredible.

Draco was out of his head with the sheer realization he was _inside_ Shadow. Sweat-slicked palms grasped at Shadow’s thin waist. Thrusting up, standing on tip-toe, he pressed his lover down further on him until the tight incredible heat engulfed him completely. Shadow gave a long low cry while a strangled wheeze escaped Draco's throat. White light with sparks of red flashed in front of Draco's eyes as his whole body gave a slow, bone-deep shudder.

_Ohgodohgodohgod…_

Shadow couldn’t stop the tears. Even with his eyes squeezed painfully tight, tears still streamed down his cheeks. Draco filled him completely, split him open. Draco was there, inside the deepest part of him. And then Draco was moving, thrusting, pulling Shadow’s body up and down relentlessly. Shadow was sobbing. The pain ebbing and flowing, dancing with the sheer pleasure assaulting his system until he was flying, flying, _cumming_ …

"Draco!" he screamed, clinging to the only thing stable in the whole imploding universe.

The silken passage gripping him tightened impossibly and Draco growled, the sensation almost painful. Warmth drenched his chest and stomach; the smell drove him wild. He bucked his hips hard, wishing for a better angle. Shadow curled around his shoulders, gasping like a drowning man, and Draco thrust upward into him, allowed deeper into the now limp body. Hips rocking faster, harder, until Shadow was mewling again, whimpering from over-sensitization, tightening slowly around him like a vice. With a deep moan, Draco tipped over into paradise, explosions going off behind his eyes.

A moment of blackout, where they were both lost and adrift in a sea of burning ecstasy.

Blinking away tears, Draco felt his trembling legs finally give and he sank slowly to his knees, Shadow's back dragging down the wall with a sensual hiss. He was still breathing hard; Shadow's breath hitched with residual sobs. Draco nuzzled his jaw and lapped gently at the trail of tears. He kissed each eye before dipping back down to that delicious mouth.

Turning, pressing his own back to the wall, he sat down, keeping a tight hold on Shadow so his lover continued to straddle his lap. They shared languid, messy kisses while their hearts returned to more sedate paces. Shadow sighed in contentment, pressing his forehead gently against his lover. Draco smiled, filled with an almost overwhelming sense of adoration for the man in his arms.

"Drey…" The name was hardly a whisper it was so softly spoken. Gently, Shadow stroked over Draco's tear-streaked cheeks.

Unable to respond, too choked up, so full of emotion, Draco had to squeeze his eyes shut. Soft butterfly kisses rained down on his face, and he forced himself to breathe deeply and evenly, his arms tightening possessively around his lover. It took a few minutes before he could clear his throat and finally open his eyes.

"Are you okay?” he asked, rough and hoarse, as if he’d been screaming for hours. “Did I hurt you?"

"I'm fine," Shadow murmured sleepily. His head rested on Draco's collarbone, tucked under his chin. His hand traced aimlessly over the sweaty skin of the blond's chest, circled a nipple before continuing on in its gentle course. "Feel good."

"We should get in the bath before we stiffen up."

Shadow nodded and slowly forced his limp legs to lift him onto his feet. His arse throbbed, the pain deep and persistent. He ignored it as best he could and tried to get his balance.

Draco stood with equal difficulties, his thighs screaming. His pain was forgotten completely when he noticed the grimace on his lover's face. His smoky grey eyes filled with concern and he gently scooped Shadow up into his arms bridal style.

"Rest," he murmured. "I got you."

Shadow considered protesting, but he decided it would be stupid. He was very comfortable and it made Draco feel better to take care of him so he might as well let him. With a sigh, he closed his eyes and relaxed, enjoying the lethargy that saturated his body. He had never felt so free and happy in his entire life. It was an amazing feeling.

**xXx**

Severus would have enjoyed the quiet dinner more if he hadn't been forced to hear the feverish coupling that occurred two hours ago. It'd been a long time indeed since he'd had to consider such needs, and being forced to realize what marriage would mean for his son and his highly sexual chosen mate did not put him in a good mood. He'd have to see about adding a silencing ward to their bedrooms at least.

Not that he was pleased with that solution; it aggravated him to think Shadow might call for him in need and Severus would be unable to hear. But Draco would most likely always be with him. Severus no longer needed to guard Shadow. As much as his son insisted that he needed Severus still, the older man knew their relationship would have to change or it wouldn't survive the years.

Draco felt his mentor's ire and diplomatically refrained from smirking or making any subtle digs. There was a time when he'd, well, puff out his chest like a peacock, but he'd grown wiser and knew better than to press Severus's buttons. Not to mention Shadow would notice and get upset. And besides, Draco felt too good to ruin it by picking a fight. Maybe tomorrow if he grew bored and needed amusement.

"What do you think?" Shadow asked after explaining his idea.

"I agree," Severus answered thoughtfully as he always did when presented with a challenge. "We do not know what effects the White magic will have on a natal disease. However, we do know that though Draco's vampirism wasn't completely cured, the worse symptoms are diminished. It may be worth the risk of failure or mutation for Mr. Bletchy since he isn't expected to live much longer."

"Then the sooner the better, right?" Shadow bit his lip nervously, dipping his head forward to hide the shame in his eyes. "I'm not sure I'm ready to go to Hogwarts."

Severus had expected nothing less. "We can floo to the Headmistress's office and discretely meet him in the infirmary. I'm sure Poppy will be pleased to oversee the healing in case things go wrong."

"You don't think they will, do you?"

Draco reached over and held his hand, gently brushing his thumb over the prominent knuckles. "No. White magic heals, Shadow. It doesn't hurt. The worst that can happen is you don't fix him. Nothing will have changed."

"Except that I gave him hope just to take it away."

"I have found it is always better to have hope than to live without it," Severus spoke into the silence.

Shadow smiled softly. He would be eternally grateful for the hope this man had in _him,_ even in the face of years where it seemed he'd never wake again. "Okay. Then you'll contact McGonagall?"

"I will. When would you like to do this?"

Shadow glanced at Draco, blushing furiously. He was tired and sated, having just lost his virginity. He didn't think tonight would be a good night to try an unconventional healing. "Tomorrow after curfew. That way we won't run into anyone accidentally."

"Very well. I shall be gone for a few hours. I have errands to run." Severus patted his mouth and rose from the table gracefully.

Draco waited for him to leave before allowing his expression to reflect his utter happiness. "What do you want to do?"

"Neville will be here soon," Shadow answered quietly, fighting embarrassment. "I guess we have a wedding to plan… Hmmm…"

"I know that look…" Draco narrowed his eyes suspiciously. "What are you thinking?"

Shadow drummed his fingers on the table. "You wouldn't mind if we had a slightly larger wedding, would you?"

"What do you mean?"

"I'm the one who wants to keep it small, right?"

"I don't mind it being small," Draco answered slowly, but he was catching on. "You want to make it bigger, invite more people, so that it gives Longbottom more of a challenge."

Shadow ducked his head. "I want our wedding to be beautiful, for you. I don't really care about decorations or ceremonies or who sees. I just want to be with you forever." He looked up at his lover earnestly. "But if we're going to do the whole wedding thing, then I was thinking we could include George in on the planning. If it's too small, then it will be too easy. It won't keep them engaged."

Draco was of two minds. First, his heart practically sang when Shadow confessed to just wanting to be with him. On the other hand, their wedding was supposed to be about them and Shadow was having it more for other people, including Draco.

"Drey…" Shadow felt his lover's conflicted emotions and hated that he had caused it. "It was a stupid idea. Forget it. We'll keep things the way they are. I'll think of something else."

"No…" Draco shook his head, realizing Shadow was reading him and quickly brought up his Occlumency shields. He smiled and tried to hide his disappointment. "You don't really care about weddings, but you do care about your friends. If the wedding gives you something to do with them, to help them, you'll invest more in it. It's a good idea."

"They're not the only reason…"

Draco cut him off. "Not the only reason, I know." He leaned forward and caught Shadow’s lips in a gentle kiss.

Shadow felt his worries subside a bit at the loving gesture, but he still couldn't help feeling he had messed things up. Before he could say anything, though, Neville walked serenely into the room.

"I'm going to get started on base spells for the portkeys we'll need to include in the invitations. You two have fun." Draco kissed Shadow once more and left the two to their own devices.

"Hey, Nev," Shadow greeted, standing and giving him a hug. "Are you hungry?"

“I'm fine," Neville demurred. "What do you need my help with?"

"Well, to start with, I'm not sure about the invite list and we need to know how many are coming so we'll have enough food and space."

That reminded him. If he was going to expand the guest list from intimates to include acquaintances, he might not want to have the wedding right outside their house. It was secret, after all. He didn't exactly want anyone and everyone to just be able to drop by. This was his sanctuary. He explained this to Neville as they got situated in the parlor.

"And I want to write a letter to George. He stood by me and I would like to see him again. Maybe he could help us plan."

Neville considered all the issues Shadow had raised. He hadn't realized just how involved planning a wedding would be. He felt his mind quicken and flow in more human channels, latching onto specifics instead of generalities. It was a bit confusing, his perspective skewing to the side, and he was relieved to hear Shadow was thinking of asking another to help plan.

"I would be glad to see George again," he managed to articulate.

Shadow smiled, sensing empathetically the minute changes in Neville's emotions. "Great. I'll write him. He could come two nights from now."

"Why not tomorrow?" They had a lot of work ahead of them and in his opinion the sooner George got here the better.

Shadow explained about his planned attempted to heal Miles. He was pleased to see Neville's interest. It seemed enlarging the wedding was a good idea after all. He'd just have to think of some way to make it up to Draco.

**xXx**

_~ Friday, March 16th ~_

"Are you ready?" Severus held out a handful of floo powder.

Shadow stared at the fireplace, sharp emotions crackling under his skin. _Am I?_

Draco met Severus's eyes before looking back down on his lover. "Shadow?"

"Will you go first?" Shadow whispered, hating how he sounded like a scared child. "Make sure it's safe?"

"Of course." Draco bent and gently kissed lips drawn tight with anxiety. "I'll be waiting."

Severus watched the blond disappear in a flash of green. He turned to Shadow expectantly, but Shadow still would not move any closer. It was as if he'd been struck with a paralysis hex. "We do not have to do this tonight."

"We do," Shadow argued, hands fisting. "Miles is hurting. I can't just put it off because I'm afraid."

"There is no reason this has to be hard for you." Severus reached forward and curled his arm around the slender shoulder of his nearly adult son. "We shall floo together."

A hot blush of embarrassment rose in his cheeks, but he didn't pull away. "I'm being ridiculous."

"This is between you and me. No one else is here. No one else matters." He smiled when he felt Shadow begin to relax, long fingers grasping at him firmly. "Ready?"

Shadow nodded. He hated hiding in his father's robes like this, but at the same time he felt safe and reassured. He closed his eyes tight, holding fast to Severus, as the man threw down the powder calling out their destination. Then he was whirling.

An overwhelming feeling of helplessness wrapped around him as he was flung out of control through the magical transport. A scream ripped from his throat and he practically clawed at Severus. Then it was over. They stumbled and would have fallen if it weren't for Draco catching their shoulders and bracing them. Eyes wide and wild, Shadow gasped, heart rocketing in his chest. He didn't like flooing _at all_!

"I got you, baby," Draco murmured, pulling his love into his arms and rubbing his back.

Shadow looked frantically around the office, but it was empty.

"She's waiting by the gargoyle," Draco answered the unspoken question.

"Thank you." Shadow squeezed his hand tight. _What would I do without you?_

"Are you ready?" Severus asked calmly for the second time that night.

Nodding, Shadow stepped away from his fiancé, but he kept a firm grip on his hand.

The gargoyle slid aside. Minerva smiled as they stepped out of the office. "Shadow, Severus, Draco. It is a pleasure to see you all again."

"Thank you. It has been too long." Severus half-bowed.

Minerva laughed. "I am beginning to be suspicious of your true identities. Who are you really? Certainly not the old, snarky Potions Professor."

"He has mellowed with age," Draco teased with a smirk.

Shadow smiled, tension finally leaving him. He was safe with Severus and Draco. He didn't have to be afraid. "He's like wine, apparently, and just as bitter."

Severus snorted and crossed his arms. "If you are done laughing at my expense, can we continue on?"

They moved down the corridor toward the infirmary, but Minerva couldn't stop looking at Shadow. The boy had grown so much. They all had really. "You look well. I am glad."

"Thanks." Shadow shyly ducked his head.

"What you are attempting is incredible. I want you to know that, no matter what happens tonight, I am proud of you."

Shadow shook his head but said nothing. He didn't really feel the gratitude was deserved. They didn't even know if he _could_ heal Miles yet. As for her pride, he didn't really care. He was doing this for his friend, not for her or even for himself.

They stepped into the infirmary a few minutes later. The first thing Shadow saw was Rogan. He almost didn't recognize him. Gone was the hyper child and in his place stood a confident eighteen-year-old. Rogan didn't smile when he caught Shadow's eyes. He was standing beside Miles's hospital bed. The kindhearted boy was as small as Shadow remembered him being at fourteen. His pain-lined face was the only thing giving away his age.

Lillian had changed most of all. Her hair was no longer short. The black tresses were braided down her back. She stood tall, big-breasted, and slightly heavy. Strength radiated off her as she watched over the two she loved more than anything else in the world. Shadow saw in her expression that she was afraid she would lose both of them if Miles didn't survive. That fear, of being completely alone in the world, weighed heavily on her.

"Can you really help him?" she demanded.

"At least say hello first, Lils," Miles scolded her. He turned a bright smile on Shadow. "Hey. It's been a while. How are you?"

"I was in a coma," Shadow admitted to the room. He didn't feel anything except the absolute truth belonged here. "I'm sorry I didn't come see you guys sooner."

"Coma?" Rogan frowned and ran his eyes over Shadow's body. "I don't recall you fighting in the final battle. Why were you in a coma?"

"That's none of your concern," Draco snapped. "You should be grateful we're here now."

Shadow squeezed his hand. "It's okay. They were my friends and think I abandoned them. They deserve an answer."

"If they were your friends, they wouldn't demand one. They'd trust you," Draco countered darkly. How dare they imply Shadow hadn't done enough during the war! Shadow had _suffered_ more than they could ever comprehend.

"They _are_ trusting me. They're letting me try and heal Miles when we have no idea if it will work."

Shadow looked over at the adults, surprised they were staying out of the conversation. Minerva and Severus stood to the side, watching. Poppy was obviously unhappy. Her arms crossed as she frowned at them all. He realized everyone but the Slytherins knew his other identity. Draco must have caught something in his expression hinting at where his thoughts were headed. His hand tightened once and then let him go. He wasn't happy, but he acknowledged the fact that it was Shadow's decision to make.

"I was at the final battle. I was once Harry Potter." He lifted his shirt up, exposing his too skinny frame and the lightning bolt scar on his chest above his heart, along with the other scars he'd received years ago in the graveyard. Lillian gasped, Rogan's mouth fell open, but Miles merely smiled as if he'd guessed.

"So you think you can heal me?" Miles asked, changing the subject.

Shadow let his shirt fall. "I have access to magic that may be able to, yes. I haven't done anything like this before, but I have healed many wounds that would have otherwise been fatal."

"Then let's give this a go." Miles released Rogan's hand and lay back, unafraid.

"You two might want to stand with them," Draco suggested. He nodded his head at Minerva and Severus.

Shadow didn't argue. Draco knew the instincts of his Animagus form better than Shadow did himself. If the blond thought they should move to the side, then they probably should. Lillian opened her mouth to argue, but Miles shushed her. Sharp spikes of anxiety wafted off the two Slytherins as they slowly moved away from Miles.

Poppy stood across from them, closer to the hospital bed in case she had to intervene. Draco stood behind Shadow, his presence comforting, telling him he was guarded from behind. He was safe. Taking a deep breath, Shadow closed his eyes and reached for Seraphim.

Rogan held Lillian to his chest as magic filled the room with a roar like the ocean's. His blue eyes were wide as he watched the boy he'd known only briefly begin to transform into something else. Something not human.

Shadow grew taller, his shirt tearing and falling away. The pants remained, Draco having shot a sizing charm at them to make the waist larger, but they revealed pale ankles and fair a bit of calf as Shadow grew several inches. Long hair spilled down the creature's back, but it wasn't really hair. It was too fluid. Wings, gorgeous white wings, rose from the creature's shoulder blades and spread wide, flapping once and filling the room with a musky bird smell. Sharp claws on hands and feet, which were more like paws. The skin turned golden. Dark tattoos appeared over torso and face.

"Merlin," Lillian whispered, terrified. "What is he?"

"If you can't handle it, get out," Draco snapped, his eyes gone silver as his protective instincts rose. "Your fear will only upset him." He crowded close to his crouching lover hoping it would sooth him.

Seraphim looked around the room, which was strangely flat and clear at the same time. Two youths - a male and a female - stood to the side, protected by two adults. They were afraid, but the adults were calm. The Dark One was Seraphim's pack. The scent of his mate was at his back.

Seraphim turned, trusting the Dark One to watch the others, and took the blond male in his arms. His wings came up and around, curtaining them from view as he nuzzled at his mate's ear, licking it. Utter contentment sang through him. His mate was here, healthy, safe. Then he noticed the smell of sickness.

Crinkling his nose, he released his mate and took a few steps forward. Yes. A sick fledgling lay in the bed, dull pain saturating the young body. As he approached, he sensed the fear rise in the other two youths. They were mates to the sick one. Seraphim cooed, trying to sooth them, but he would be just as upset to lose his own mate. His chest ached at the thought of losing the strong blond.

No. He wouldn't let them lose their mate. It was too horrible. He focused on the ill one, getting a feel for the degrading body. His left wing came up and gently caressed the male. The gasp his touch invoked had the other two moving forward only to be restrained by the adults.

Seraphim growled. This illness went deep. He wouldn't let it win. Climbing on the bed, straddling the young male, he pulled him gently to his chest, his wings coming up to cocoon them both. Seraphim tipped his head back and howled, opening himself to the White, allowing it to pour through him.

With the magic came feelings he did not like. The feeling of utter _desperation,_ the sheer _need_ to repair his body, to set things right and stop the destruction. To return things to the way they were meant to be. It was worse than fear; it was to _be_ so broken that death slides within every atom of a body that cries out so loudly to be mended, to be saved. He had to go there, to that desolate place, in order to reach the White. The memory of being so utterly broken and sliding into death never leaves him completely, but now he had to lose himself to that awful feeling in order to draw as much White as the ill one needed.

Great howling sobs rose from his throat, a desperate cry as his mind slipped into the past. The body that was dying wasn't a strange fledgling's, it was his own. He was dying! He was broken! Hurts **hurts** _hurts_! Do _anything_ , just make it **STOP**. He grabbed at the White desperately, pulling more and more into his body. Cleaving to the magic, begging it to force the darkness to leave him. _Anything_ to get it to surrender. To stop the **pain**.

Seraphim fell backward into the arms of his mate. Horrible high-pitched whines escaped him, his whole body shuddering. But he was healed. There was no more icy-cold death creeping along his bones, into his marrow, trying to rip his soul from him. He was exhausted but alive. Alive in his mate's warm arms as the beta-male rocked him, rubbed his back between his limp wings, holding him as horrible, terrified shudders wracked his body. He curled up, allowing his mate to be above him, to protect him, and fell into a deep and exhausted sleep.

**xXx**

Draco crouched, using his body to shield the unconscious form of his lover. Seraphim melted away leaving Shadow curled up on the infirmary floor. Poppy was huddled over Miles, casting rapid-fire diagnostic spells. Rogan and Lillian broke free of the hands holding them and ran to their lover's bedside while Severus quickly moved toward Draco.

"Is he dead?" Lillian demanded breathlessly.

Rogan held her tightly to keep his own hands from reaching for Miles and interfering with the Mediwitch's spells.

"Is he well?" Severus asked lowly, dark eyes on his son.

"He's just tired," Draco assured. "After healing me, he slept for almost fourteen hours remember."

"But he was able to make it back to the house first," Severus countered.

"He used more magic here. I think he really healed Miles completely; he couldn't do that with me. Besides, he used both Black and White, not just White."

"I don't believe it," Poppy breathed, astonished. "He's cured."

Rogan bit his lip and looked over at Draco who stood with Shadow in his arms. "Thank you."

Lillian burst into tears and flung herself on Miles's sleeping form, oblivious to everyone else.

Draco inclined his head in acknowledgement. "I'll tell him you said so."

"Are you leaving? I'd like to tell him myself."

"I'm sure you'll see us again." With that, Draco turned and left the room, intent on getting Shadow home and in bed.

Severus followed, Minerva falling into step with him. "That boy is a living miracle," she said softly.

"Not everyone would think so," Severus countered. He did not like the look in her eyes.

"He could do so much for…"

"Stop." Severus pulled her around to face him, eyes dark and dangerous. "You have not known Shadow has awakened for more than an hour before already deciding what he should or should not do with himself. This is _his_ life. He will decide where he goes, what he does. He owes no one his allegiance or his freedom."

She had the grace to look ashamed. "I'm sorry."

"If that is true, then you will keep Shadow's reemergence a secret. When we are ready to tell the world he is alive and well, we will do so on our own."

"I wouldn't have breathed a word, Severus," she snapped, insulted.

"No, but you may have thought it necessary to tell us of problems or ask him to step in and heal others. That would have the same results," he answered icily.

Minerva looked away, saying nothing. She was thinking of others Shadow could help. And why not? The boy had a gift. He should feel honored to use it. Her heart gave a pang, wondering if Dumbledore had thought those very same thoughts. Was this the beginning of the road that ended in seeing people as mere pawns? She didn't know.

Shadow was a smart young man. He was aware of his abilities and was equally aware that the world possessed an abundance of those in need. If he wanted to heal people, he would do so. He didn't need her to try and maneuver him into it. Not to mention she had seen with her own eyes that it had cost him something to do this healing. She could not presume to tell him if it was worth it or not.

"I understand. I am sorry," she finally murmured, honestly this time.

"Good." Severus let his eyes burn her a moment longer before turning and gracefully striding away.

**xXx**

_~ Saturday, March 17th ~_

Shadow opened his eyes slowly. His head pounded painfully and at first he couldn't remember why. He turned, facing Draco who slept with a frown marring his handsome features. Shadow soothed those lines before slipping from the warm embrace. He needed to think. Once again, he pulled on his robe over his pajamas. He didn't go to Draco's old room, however. This time he moved to the music room.

His piano sat there, the wood glowing a warm color as late afternoon light filled the rom. Shadow hesitated. It had been a long time. Did he even remember how to play? With a shrug he moved forward. The bench was warm and smooth. He winced as his bottom gave a dull pang from his encounter with Draco two nights before. Healing salves could only do so much.

As his fingers wandered aimlessly over the keys, getting a feel for the notes and the instrument again, he slowly remembered the healing. It was strange, remembering things from his Animagus's point of view. More animal instinct, less human reason. Many people believe that humans are practically animals themselves. So emotional and often barbaric, but it's not true.

Even when emotional or cruel, there is usually some level of thinking involved. Be it irrationally or cruelly, humans are always thinking away. Not so with animals. Seraphim moved on instinct with a limited understanding of cause and effect. So it was a strange feeling, looking back and applying reason where there'd been none.

One thing was certain, without his hang-ups and mental scars from his abuse, he felt much easier about loving Draco. He was able to be more affectionate. In human form, they had to play a delicate game of slowly seducing Shadow and pressing the issue just carefully enough not to spark bad memories or make him pull away. Sex would always bring up mixed feelings for him even though he wished it wouldn't. He didn't think he'd ever be the one to instigate intimacy between them.

"Are you well?"

Shadow turned to see his father standing in the doorway. He smiled in welcome and gestured to the space beside him on the bench. "Just thinking. Maybe you can help me work through it."

"Of course." Severus moved into the room and sat facing outward and away from the piano. He waited patiently, enjoying the gentle melody his son tapped out.

"Seraphim's not any one animal, but he still thinks like one. Or rather, doesn't think. He intuits, moves on instinct, reads body language. He understands cause and effect, but only in twos. He can't comprehend a longer chain where a cause can lead to many effects. Just the immediate one. One action equals one reaction. He's very practical. Things are or things aren't."

"I am an Animagus myself. I understand," Severus assured him, trying to make whatever he was trying to say easier.

Shadow nodded. He had forgotten. "Well, even though I changed with the intension of healing Miles, as Seraphim I no longer felt concern for anyone who wasn't my pack."

"But you did heal him."

"Only because Rogan and Lillian were there." Shadow sat silently for a minute, his attention on the music. "I guess Seraphim has more human traces than an animal really does, even though he is still mostly animalistic. He felt compassion for them because their mate was dying. He empathized because he knew how painful it would be if he – I – lost Draco. I mean, he's me. I was just speaking in third person to differentiate between my two mindsets. I know he's not a different being than me."

"That is good," Severus said wryly. He crossed his ankles and laid his hands on his stomach, obviously at ease. "As for your concerns, animals can feel very attached to their mate, but you are right. They would not be able to apply that sense to another mated pair. Their only concern is the protection of their pack or mate or young. Everyone else must fend for themselves. That is the way of nature."

His father's calm was contagious. His shoulders relaxed. "I'm glad it worked out. I really needed to be able to do this for Miles."

"Why?" Severus asked gently. "Do you feel guilty?"

"Not for his condition," Shadow reassured. "I know he was born with that, but they were my friends. I wasn't there for them. Not when they were facing Umbridge and not after the battle."

"I see." Severus took a moment to consider a response. "Shadow, you were pushed to the limits of your body and mind. No one blames you for needing time to recover. Three years isn't so long. And I fear I contributed to the length of your coma."

Shadow turned to face him, the last notes fading under his still fingers. "How?"

"You were distressed. You often cried silently or went rigid with pain. I began to feed you calming potions to allow you to rest peacefully."

"I… I dreamed a lot. Or remembered." Shadow wrapped his arms around his chest. "I try not to think about it too much. It was… _horrible_. Really horrible. I didn't want to remember. I still don't want to remember. What Uncle did to me… I thought I'd go mad with the pain… I did go mad. I just wanted to get away from it… I needed space. So I broke.

"I still can't really grasp it. It's like fog in my head. I do remember, but I can't _feel_ it all the time or I'll go crazy. So I push it away, let the fog cover it. I try not to think about it, try not to remember. I focus on the good things. You, Draco, being alive. I try to focus on other people, but it’s still there." Tears spilled down his cheeks. "It's never going to go away completely, is it, Severus? Even if I am miraculously healed, the memories will still be there. They'll always be there."

"I'm afraid so." Severus pulled his son against his chest. "I'm so sorry, Shadow. If I could bear this for you, I would."

Shadow took a deep breath, trying to push down the panic and pain. He was safe. It was over, the past. "When I use White magic, I have to go there. To those memories. But usually I only have to skim the surface. I only need a little bit to heal surface wounds, but with Miles… I had to go there again. I needed so much more. I thought it was me dying again. I just want to live, Severus. God. He hurt me so much."

Severus rocked him as Shadow broke down. He closed his eyes and tried not to feel helpless rage or despair. Neither would help his son. He had to remind himself that things were better now. Shadow was no longer being hurt. He whispered these things in the teen's ear. Slowly he calmed again.

"Thanks."

"I will always be here for you," Severus answered. He brushed the curly bangs from wet eyes gently. "The time will come where these moments of remembering will be rare and you will be happy."

"I am happy," Shadow protested.

Severus didn't argue, but he couldn't help but fear that Shadow had no idea what true happiness was. He had snippets and good days, but never a feeling of happiness that lasted for more than mere moments. Severus was determined to give that to him.

"Love, George is here," Draco said as he walked into the room. He yawned, the sun still a few hours from setting.

Shadow smiled over his shoulder at him. "Really?"

Draco frowned as he took in his lover's red eyes. "You okay?"

"Yeah." Shadow looked up at his father. "I think I will be." He hugged Severus briefly before walking over to Draco. "Are you going back to sleep?"

Draco kissed him, pulling the smaller body against his. "Do you need me?"

"I'll be fine." Shadow smiled and pulled away. "Go back to sleep. Really. I'm okay."

Draco watched him go before turning his attention to Severus. "What happened?"

"The healing overwhelmed him. He was forced to re-experience some of the things from his past. He associates pain with White magic so it is to be expected."

The blond scowled, obviously not happy with that answer. Severus was equally displeased, but he understood that Shadow would have to go through these moments in order to truly heal. Not to mention if they tried to tell Shadow what to do, they'd only get pushed away. Shadow wasn't going to let himself be controlled ever again.

"I'm going to take a long bath before dinner," Draco finally filled the silence.

"Very well. I'll go to my office in case Shadow should need one of us."

Draco nodded, pleased. The office was far enough away that Shadow wouldn’t feel smothered, might not even suspect he was being watched so closely. Without another word, Draco turned and went to the bathroom, his stomach growling. He hoped Omi had cooked a feast. He was starving and, after that massive use of magic, he was sure Shadow was, too.

**Chapter end.**

**A/N:** As a bday gift, hit me with some feedback! :D


	5. Making It Better When It Hurts

**Making It Better When It Hurts**

The setting sun filled the windows with deep golden light and Shadow hurried downstairs, stomach tied in knots. He was both excited and scared to met George again. Halfway down, he caught a glimpse of red. His feet slowed as he stepped off the staircase and stared into the sitting room. He could just see a thin young man's back and the tell-tale hair. Taking a deep breath, he moved across the distance separating them.

George turned just as he stepped into the room. Shadow took in the deep smudges under blue eyes, the hallowed out cheeks, the slowly blooming smile. Shadow wasn't good at letting people in. After the many abuses he'd endured at the hands of others, forming relations had become quite difficult. Despite that, the twins had always supported him. They hadn't demanded more than he could give, even though they _deserved_ more. George especially. Shadow felt guilty that even after three years of no contact, after apparent abandonment, this man would still greet him with unconditional friendship.

"George." Shadow beat down the instinctive fear and wrapped the redhead in a tight hug. "Thank you. For everything. For coming…"

He let his words trail off as George hugged him back just as tightly. The feel of the redhead's magic washed over him, and it felt wrong. Instinctively, Shadow made a sweep with his empathy. His two-colored eyes widened.

George stepped back and looked down at him with a wry smile. "I thought you'd realize. Almost didn't come because of it."

Shadow shook his head mutely, too shocked to say anything yet.

George tugged him over to a couch and sat next to him, keeping hold of his hand. "If you really mean it. The thank you. You won't interfere."

Shadow shook himself, mind whirling with calculations. "It's not my decision. Not my life."

"Thanks, mate," he said with relief. "I thought you'd say that."

"That's why you came, even though you knew I'd sense it." Shadow looked down at their still linked fingers. "Does anyone else know?"

"No," George answered just as softly. "I keep to myself most of the time. At first it was necessary, but now I'm just worried what will happen if someone finds out what I did."

"I'm glad you came," Shadow repeated firmly.

"Me, too." George smiled again, and this time the tension that sat heavy on his shoulders disappeared. "It's nice to get out. Nice to talk to someone else."

"I would have contacted you sooner. I fell into a coma after the battle. Just recently woke up."

George frowned, concerned. "I thought you were getting away, leading the good life. You okay?"

Shadow considered it. His mind was whole, true, but he wasn't mentally healthy. Not yet. He still had issues with himself and the world, phobias, and mental ticks to deal with. "I'm getting along," he finally answered.

George smiled wryly. "Sometimes that's all you can hope for."

"I never did explain, did I?" Shadow hadn't planned on talking about this, but considering what he'd just learned, he felt he had to. Maybe it would help both of them. "When Voldemort tried to kill me when I was a baby, my mother's spell rebounded most of the Killing Curse, but some still got through…"

George listened as Shadow talked about the abuse, talked about literally breaking himself in pieces just to survive, talked about his tenuous condition once he reached Hogwarts and how further abuse began to degrade his sanity to a critical point. Halfway through the telling, Neville entered. Shadow nodded at him, but he continued to talk to George as if they were still alone. The redhead never spoke, but his face shifted continuously from shock, to fury, to deep sympathy. Shadow, himself, had to fight back the rage, terror, and bottomless grief that he still felt as he revisited the things he'd suffered, had barely survived intact.

" _Merlin_. Shadow. I'm sorry," George said roughly, obviously distressed that words couldn't convey the depth of his regret or how Shadow's story had affected him.

"It's maddening," Neville agreed, his own hands fisted until the knuckles blanched white. "Not being able to do something. I want to go into the past and change all of it."

Shadow blinked tears away and smiled. "I don't know. Not that I'm glad I went through that shit, but… I kind of like where I'm at." His smile grew. "I've got a father who loves me, good friends who would do anything for me, and…" A blush darkened his cheeks as a joyful huff of laughter escaped his chest. "I'm getting married!"

George burst into startled laughter. "What? To who?"

"Nev, will you get my fiancé?" Shadow asked shyly. Part of him wanted to show Draco off, the other part just missed him and jumped at any excuse to have him near. Although he _was_ looking forward to seeing the look on George's face. He also wanted to talk to him alone for a moment.

"George. Fred. Believe me when I say, I know what you're going through better than anyone else. I _know_ what it's like to have more than one person with different opinions and wants sharing the same body. How hard the give and take can be. I can see how it's wearing you both down and also that you’re managing it pretty well on your own. But if you need to talk or need help, maybe even some tips on how to maintain a balance, I'm here. So is Severus who, to be honest, would probably be able to help you more than I. No one here would take away your choice or tell anyone else about your situation. I give you my word."

George's eyes grew bright with tears and he yanked Shadow to him in a desperate hug. "He was _slipping away_. I couldn't bear to live without him. We always had a connection, and I just… held on. I didn't know what I was doing until he slipped inside. At first, I was so happy. I thought it was great. I told my parents, but they thought I was crazy with grief. Then… it got harder. As much as we love each other, as similar as we are, we're different. Two people living so close together are bound to drive each other insane."

"Does Fred ever have control of your body?"

George nodded, his cheek rubbing against soft curls. "There's this grey place before waking where we decide who uses it for the day. Can't switch back and forth like you did. The one who has control when waking has it until we sleep and decide again."

"He's aware now, though," Shadow pointed out. He'd felt the duel emotions. That's how he'd known. Fred definitely hadn't wanted to come and reveal themselves. He'd been hammering George pretty hard with his anger. Once Shadow promised not to interfere, Fred's anger had turned to relief. Now he was a mess of frustration, wariness, and excitement.

George shrugged and pulled away. "He's awake when I'm awake."

"Can you hear his thoughts?"

"No. I just get feelings, impressions. It's like a pressure against the inside of my skin pressing slightly out."

"Well, you're here now." Shadow took his hand again. "You're not alone. Maybe a distraction will help you both."

"Distraction?"

Shadow beamed. "I need help planning the wedding."

George almost fell over. "What? _You're_ planning it? If you're getting married to who I think you're getting married to, how come _he's_ not planning it?"

"Because I asked _him_."

George laughed loudly and pounced on his petite friend. "Way to go, Shadow!"

Draco and Neville chose that moment to walk in. A pale blond eyebrow rose and grey eyes glinted dangerously. "Hands off, Weasley. He's mine."

"Not yet," George countered and leaned even more weight on Shadow.

The brunet toppled to his side, George's upper body lying on top of him. Shadow's lips twitched in a wry smile as he felt a spike of amusement from Fred egging George on. However, Draco wasn't humored in the slightest. Shadow quickly wiggled free and moved to his lover's side, wrapping an arm around his waist. Draco sighed, his building fury leaking away as he propped his chin on the top of Shadow's head.

George straightened, still chuckling. "I can't believe I had it wrong this whole time."

"Had what wrong?" Neville asked curiously. He felt more human than he had in a long time. Granted, he also hadn't been with this many people in a long time.

"Who wears the pants in the relationship," George crowed. "I should've seen it sooner. Shadow obviously has him wrapped around his little finger."

"I believe we're both wearing pants," Draco muttered half-heartedly. He didn't feel at all insulted by the truth. He actually felt a strange pride that he was so focused on Shadow's wants and needs.

Shadow blushed as Draco's devotion washed over him like warm summer sunshine. "So how's this wedding thing go anyway?" he asked quickly.

Draco was the first to answer. “Traditionally, the one proposed to..."

"The woman," George interrupted with a snicker.

Draco shot him a glare. "Is in charge of the reception or gala after the ceremony. The one who proposes is asking the…"

"Wife," George interrupted again with an unrepentant grin.

Draco chose to ignore him. "To join their family, so the ceremony would follow those traditions."

"So a Snape wedding," Shadow concluded. "The problem is Snape is a Muggle family. My lineage book explains that they are a noble family descended from royalty, thus the large manor and town that bears the Snape name. However, Severus’s mother was a Pureblooded witch, a Prince. Despite that, the Prince line has technically ended. Eileen Prince was disowned when she married Severus's father. So I don't think anything Prince would be appropriate since neither Severus nor I are acknowledged as Princes."

Shadow sighed ruefully. "I thought Draco would be the one to say this, but royalty or not I'm not sure I want a purely Muggle ceremony. So much of our relationship feels like magic. Magic runs so strong in both of us. I'd hate to leave it out. Plus, Draco is a Pureblood, a Black. I want the ceremony to do him honor."

Draco gently caressed Shadow's cheek. "All I need is you, but you're forgetting who else you belong to, Shadow Harold Lilium Snape. Your adoption didn't cancel out your other bloodlines or inheritances."

Shadow blinked, startled. "Potter." He'd linked the name Potter to Harry Potter, Boy-Who-Lived, and all the political baggage that he hated. For the first time, he actually considered the Potter family, the tapestry of history and tradition that it carried. "But I don't want to leave Severus out completely. He's my father."

"It's not a problem," George piped up. The giddy wave had ebbed and he now felt energized with new purpose. "Many Purebloods face the issue of duel family lines, or even more than two. They are so found of intermarrying."

Neville nodded. "My father was a Longbottom, but his mother was a Morningstar. When he marred my mum, he wanted to acknowledge both his parents and did a joint ceremony."

"There's a technique to it, but it can be done." George rubbed his hands together gleefully. "So we have to prepare a Potter-Snape wedding big enough to recognize the power and nobility of the long and noble house of Black. This should be fun."

"And my darling fiancé wants this done by dawn of the 23rd," Draco added with an evil smile. Revenge was his. "Yes, of this month."

George's mouth fell open. " _Why_?" he demanded.

Shadow ducked his head. “It’s the Spring Equinox. Plus, I don't want to wait forever, either."

Draco smiled, feeling tingly as he heard that. His arm tightened around his love.

"It's a good day. The Equinox is when one welcomes the Spring, the month of regrowth and vibrancy, while letting go of Winter, the time of endurance and dormancy. And dawn represents new beginnings and renewal. The embrace of day, turning one's back to night."

Now George gapped at Neville. The words should have sounded cheesy and cliché, but his deep voice had resounded with Truth and the understanding of life's deeper Mysteries.

"Symbols are important," Neville defended himself. "They have power over us and surpass the limitations of words to communicate meaning. Weddings are a way to articulate the deep commitment between two people to combine all that they are. It is also a promise to those who came before that while they are forging a new branch, they will remember and honor their history, carrying it forward into their new lives, thus ensuring their Family's immortality."

Draco's eyes were bright as he observed Neville. He realized that the brunet was just as much a Pureblood as the Malfoys or the Blacks. "Traditions aren't just about power and control. Each tradition was begun for a reason and they tell a story. It is the traditions of each family that contains the wisdoms and strengths obtained by the many generations of our ancestors."

"Wow," Shadow and George said together.

"I'm a Pureblood technically," the redhead continued. "But we didn't really learn this stuff. Sure we have tons of traditions and we were told the stories of our ancestors, but we were never told _why_ it was important to remember. We never took it too seriously."

"It's because there's so many of you," Neville explained. "Your family's history will be passed on through many branches. I am the single Longbottom heir. Draco was raised as the single heir to the Malfoy inheritance. We had to understand the importance so that we would pass it on."

Shadow felt a pang of sadness. "The Malfoy line is dead. Their accumulated knowledge and traditions will disappear."

Draco looked only mildly regretful. "Many Pureblood lines have vanished. So much has been lost to time, but new lines are rising and with them new traditions."

"The Morningstars, Princes, Prewetts, Potters, Lestranges, Malfoys… And they were just from the last two generations," George said sadly. "The war took a lot from us."

"I learned Black as well as Malfoy tradition," Draco told his love. "My mother's inheritance will be carried forward."

Shadow bit his lip. He hadn't really thought about the consequences when he proposed to Draco. "But… Since I asked you… You won't be a Black anymore."

Draco shook his head. "I'll always be a Black, just as Mother was always a Black even after she married Lucius."

"But I don't know Potter tradition," Shadow murmured. "I can't pass it on. Not to mention we don't have anyone to pass it on to."

"You still have the Potter vaults. There will be ceremonial books and histories within them." Draco suddenly grinned and kissed him. "And we have no one to pass our traditions to _yet_."

Shadow just stared as George snickered and Neville blushed. "What are you talking about? You want to adopt?"

"All in due time," Draco replied airily. "We're still young yet." He kissed his stunned lover once more before turning his attention to the others. "I'll leave you guys to it. Lots to do if you're going to look up Potter wedding ceremonies and try to combine them with the Snape's. And all before the 23rd," he added again just to see George pale. With that he turned and walked away feeling oddly triumphant.

"He is still a bloodthirsty prat." George shook his head, bemused.

"You have no idea," Neville muttered.

"Not so much anymore," Shadow defended, feeling protective. "Vindictive, yes. Bloodthirsty, no."

Neville smiled, very happy with the news. Shadow smiled back and then sighed. They had a lot of work to do. George laughed and slung an arm around each of their shoulders.

"Why the long faces? We've got a wedding to crash!"

"Don't you mean plan?" Shadow eyed him warily.

George grinned. "Or course. My mistake."

Neville shot his brother a worried look, wondering what they'd gotten themselves into.

**xXx**

This was a bad idea.

George and Neville had insisted they needed the Potter ceremonial books that very night. Of course, once Draco and Severus were told, they said they'd join them. Shadow had, at that point, naively said he'd rather at least one of them stayed with him. The others had stared with either confusion or sympathy. Severus then explained only Shadow could get into the vault. He'd have to go.

So here he was, at Gringotts, practically plastered to Draco's back.

A very bad idea.

Despite the bank being only half an hour from closing for the day and practically standing empty, Shadow felt cold sweat trickle down his spine and coat his face. The wide open atrium felt terribly exposed, and memories of the last time he was here weighed heavily on him. Death Eaters fighting, killing, dying… The press of earth all around him, desperately thirsty and in pain… Shadow twitched and flinched at every unexpected noise the goblins made, the way their steps echoed off the walls.

A whimper built in his throat. The only thing keeping him from bolting back to the house and absolute safety was Draco. His love's tall, strong body stood in front of him, a living shield. George and Neville also walked close at his sides, both shooting him worried glances. Severus paced at his back, practically on his heels. He was grateful for all of them. It was enough, barely, for him to concentrate on breathing deep and slow, and to try and convince himself he wasn't going to be hurt.

Draco felt Shadow tremble in fear and it made every nerve in his body stand at attention. His eyes swept the bank, taking in every detail in a hyper-aware flash. Every sound was tracked and analyzed as threatening or not. Everything seemed to be moving slowly, but he knew that he was instead taking in things faster. He was in hunting mode, every sense at a supernatural pitch. The only thing missing was the bloodlust.

A sharp smile slid across his face. He'd hated the creature he'd been, hated being made less human, but this… This he could get used to. He hadn't tested all the boundaries yet, but so far it looked like Shadow had miraculously removed all the vulnerabilities and crippling effects of his condition – or at least lessened them an outstanding amount – while leaving him all the strengths. Less than human, not okay. _More_ than human, perfect. He would embrace and rejoice in any added ability to protect his beloved.

Severus knew his son needed to gently reintroduce himself to the world. He was afraid Shadow would become reclusive to the point where he'd become phobic of leaving the house at all, and he'd handled Hogwarts remarkably well considering everything. However, now that he'd had time to consider, Hogwarts hadn't ended well. Forcing Shadow out too soon would be just as detrimental as allowing him to hide inside for too long. Plus, Gringotts was bound to evoke traumatic experiences.

Severus sneered bitterly. What place _wouldn't_ evoke bad memories for his son? Sometimes Shadow's healing seemed an impossible task. It was made more difficult by the obvious distress the process caused the young man. It made one want to allow him to hide, anything to bring him peace in the moment. Even sacrificing his future.

"What can I do for you?"

Shadow couldn't see the goblin who'd spoken, still standing with his face pressed between Draco's shoulders, right below his neck. He knew he'd have to step around and face the situation, but he couldn't seem to bring himself to actually do it. Panic tightened around his chest, making his head spin. He wanted to go _home_.

"We've come to enter the Potter vault," Draco informed the creature coolly.

The goblin sneered with obvious impatience. The bank was almost closed and he didn't want to deal with this nonsense. "Are you a Potter? Do you possess the vault key?"

"I represent Potter. As for the key, it's been lost," Draco answered. His silver eyes seemed to pierce the goblin. It suddenly straightened and lost its bored look.

"Very well, sir, I will need to verify the claim. Is Potter here?" Bringrod knew a predator when he was faced with one. He was still impatient, but tact may be in order.

Shadow bit his lip. Draco didn't move an inch. Through the fear, he felt a rush of gratitude. Draco wouldn't force him or even ask him to continue. He trusted Shadow to know his limits and was ready to support him fully. Tilting his head up, Shadow lay a kiss on his lover's neck with trembling lips. He really did love the blond so. Then he took a deep breath, holding onto his trust of his family and friends to protect him, and stepped up beside his lover.

The goblin raked his bulbous eyes dispassionately up and down Shadow's form. "Mr. Potter, I presume?"

Bringrod felt like hissing in displeasure, but the unblinking, threatening gaze of the other man kept him polite. This would be the seventy-fifth Potter impersonation. With the Great Harry Potter's death, the Ministry had tried to confiscate the Potter vaults, but the goblins knew there was still a child of the last Lord Potter alive and refused to release them. The world had been shocked that it seemed Lord Potter had fathered a bastard and many people had tried to claim that identity.

"Your hand please," he grated. "I must verify your claim." He held his spindly hand out.

Shadow's eyes grew round and he pressed his body flush to Draco's side. He felt ridiculous flinching away from a mere touch, but he couldn't seem to help it.

"Are you afraid I will reveal your duplicity?" Bringrod hissed, eyes narrowed.

Draco responded by putting his hands on the counter. Just in case he needed to grab the vile creature. Shadow bit his lip. He didn't want Draco to get in trouble because of him. He wanted this over with and he did _not_ want to come back. Breathlessly, he thrust his hand forward. He couldn't bring himself to grasp the goblin, so he compromised by putting it within reach. The inhuman fingers flashed forward and grasped his wrist so fast he didn't have time to even gasp. Then the other hand came up and three sharp talons dug furrows into his palm.

And just like that, the fear transformed into mind-numbing fury.

With a shriek, Shadow snapped his injured hand out of the goblin's grasp. A burst of magic sent it flying into the desks of the other workers behind it. Shadow leapt the counter, going after the thing that dared hurt him, dared to draw his blood. He was yelling incoherently now. Wandless magic vibrated around him, tossing goblins and desks out of his way as he sprinted after his target.

Draco snarled, flashing a suddenly fang-filled mouth as he dove after Shadow. His wand flashed as he knocked away goblins who were aiming fingers and palms at his lover. His other hand swiped forward, landing a punishing blow to a goblin's skull as it tried to jump on Shadow's back. It collapsed, either unconscious or dead.

Severus cursed himself soundly. He should have warned Shadow. He should have known he didn't know they would need a drop of blood. That vile goblin had taken more than a drop, however. Anger beat pure and strong in his veins as he shielded his son from magical attacks. Thank _Merlin_ Shadow hadn't transformed into his animagus form. Black magic was the last thing they needed.

Neville and George stood frozen with surprise. The battle had broken out so quickly. George took a step forward, toward the center of the chaos and screams, but Neville grabbed his shoulder to stop him. It came to the brunet that this was futile. In the end, the goblins far outnumbered the wizards. Only surprise had kept them alive so far. Already the goblins were regrouping and about to overwhelm them.

Pain and suffering were a part of the natural life cycle, as was pleasure and joy. Death was a necessary part of life, but his brother had suffered far in excess of the natural order. The imbalance was staggering, and he would not see his brother die before his life fell back into rhythm, until he experienced as many springs as he had winters.

The floor trembled. The stone vibrating with the memory of the mountains and deep caves it'd been born from. The goblins all turned as one, their eyes fastened on the Earth Mage. They worshipped Earth. They knew him for the avatar he was.

" **Drop your weapons. Cease your attack. This one has yet completed his cycle. The Earth does not yet accept his body or soul."**

"What are you saying? Is that the goblin tongue?" George demanded.

The goblins backed away from Shadow, their heads bowed. Severus and George stared at Neville, amazed. Draco didn't even pause. He stood close to Shadow's back, poised and deadly as his lover's magic pinned Bringrod to the wall.

Shadow screamed and balled his fist. Maddened, he struck the creature again and again, his bloody hand splattering red delicately across the thing's chest. The color set him off more. No longer seeing a goblin, instead seeing every face that ever tormented him, Shadow punched and yelled hysterically.

Severus paled. He'd been expecting a breakdown. Ever since Shadow had awakened, he hadn't really faced the damage done to him, not emotionally, but Severus had thought they'd have more time to bolster his son before it happened.

Strong arms came around Shadow's middle. He twisted sharply, hitting at the person attacking him. Draco took the weakening hits without flinching. He gently but firmly held Shadow to his chest.

"Shhh, it's over. You're okay. I've got you," he murmured until Shadow slowly stilled, breaking down into sobs.

"I never did anything wrong!"

A storm of rage and grief, fear and despair, tore around him until he couldn't see or think, only feel. He wanted to _die_! He wanted it to END! _No more, no more!_ He was sick of that prayer. How often had he silently begged for that very thing? For it to STOP. He couldn't do this anymore. He wasn't strong enough to go through this again.

"Let me go! I don't… I can't… Just let me go, Dray, please let me go. I don't want to do this anymore."

"Never," Draco growled roughly, his arms tightening. "I'll never let you go."

They sat there on the marble floor, Shadow wrapped in his arms, his pain an almost physical force in the room. The broken sobs a horribly devastated sound that bowed the heads of the dozens of goblins looking on.

"I will always come for you," Draco continued more gently. "I would wait forever for you. I would die for you. I _lived_ for you, even as I craved an end. It hurts, it's hard, but I'm here. I'm here, Shadow. Don't give up on me. Don't leave me."

Shadow shook his head, shocked that Draco would ask this of him. Didn't Draco love him? Didn't he see how much it hurt? Then soft lips brushed his damp, salty cheek. A hand slid up his neck into his hair, and he became aware that he was pressed to the smooth plains of Draco's chest, cradled in his lap.

The storm shrank back as he was given physical sensations to focus on instead of emotional. Gentle butterfly kisses rained on his face. The sense of security and warmth stole across his raging thoughts. The sheer contrast of the soft comfort to the mental agony shocked him, cleared his head so he could think a bit more rationally. He still wasn't sure he could do this. He couldn't live when there was no end to his life bottoming out, no stopping the agony from reaching out and consuming him.

"I'll take you to the beaches of Greece. Just us and all that sparkling blue. I'll take you to the French mountains. Miles and miles of snow and quiet. I'll take you to the Egyptian desert with all its heat and glorious sand. To the Japanese temples with majestic jade statues and unearthly peace. And I'll love you. I'll keep you safe. I'll make it better when it hurts."

Unwillingly, Shadow pictured the exotic places his love named. It sounded beautiful. It sounded like heaven. And hope bloomed undeniably. He began to cry again, this time because he knew he would not be able to escape into the much craved darkness. He wrapped his arms around Draco's neck and buried his face into the broad shoulder, both hating and loving him for tempting him back from the edge of true peace.

"I'll kiss you until your whole body tingles. I'll feed you chocolate and fruit. I'll make it good again. I'll make you happy, truly happy." Draco kissed Shadow's ear, briefly tracing the delicate shell with his warm tongue. "How about it? Will you stay with me? Will you marry me like you promised?"

Shadow shivered, terrified but unable to deny Draco anything. He pulled away, still crying and looked into gentle, unrelenting grey eyes. There would be no going back. This was it, when he decided to live or die. Draco had suffered, but he had stayed and waited for him. He'd sacrificed so much. He'd made promises and had kept every single one. Could Shadow do less? Did he love Draco as much as the blond loved him? It hurt and he was scared, but he refused to betray Draco so completely. Shadow _did_ love him and it was time to prove it.

"Yes," he rasped tearfully. "I'll stay with you. I love you."

Draco smiled, joyful and triumphant. He crushed his lover to him. "You won't regret it, my everything. I'll keep my word. You will be happy again."

Severus felt abject relief. They had finally won the war. Rebuilding would possibly take years, but they'd get there. They'd recover. He looked over at the man he had often underestimated. "Thank you, Neville."

Neville inclined his head, his own eyes bright with the victory they had won that day.

George turned to the nearest goblin, an anticipatory grin sharpening his features. "Now, about the Potter vault.”

**xXx**

"What's this about?" Ginny scowled at her brother.

At first, it seemed like a joke when George had woken them all up at four in the morning, telling them to get dressed in their ceremonial, crimson robes, but the look in her brother's eyes was unusually serious and calm. Now, here they all stood, dressed and hair done up at their mother's insistence. The sun wasn't even up yet and she was tired and hungry.

Hermione linked her fingers through Ginny's. They'd become close the last couple weeks as she took tutoring at Hogwarts, so that she could take the NEWTs. She'd been coming with Ginny every Friday to spend the weekend at the Burrow, usually to talk about Ron. The family had waited a longtime to hear the stories Hermione could tell.

"Something's going to happen. Can't you feel it?" she asked Gin, flushed and excited.

"It's time," George interrupted. He held his hand forward. Sitting in his palm was an apple-sized gold figuring of a roaring lion.

Molly immediately placed her hand on the portkey, eyes trusting as they rested on her son. Arthur, Bill, and the pregnant Fleur followed her example. Ginny sighed, nerves strung tight, as Hermione lifted their linked hands so they were also touching her brother's offering. George's solemn facade cracked and he grinned devilishly. Before anyone could yank their fingers away, there was a sharp tug and they all disappeared.

**xXx**

"The angel's awake, isn't he?" Marissa demanded breathlessly as Aunt Tonks did her hair, entwining a dark blue ribbon in the curls. It was the color of the House of Black. "My mark's been warm, and lately it throbs and tickles. It's the angel, isn't it?"

"Yes, sweetheart. The angel is awake." Tonks laughed. "All right. Let's go."

She took the recently turned seven-year-old's hand and led her toward the stairs. At the bottom stood Sirius in full regalia. Dark blue robes with intricate silver trim, silver circlet around his brow, marking him as Lord Black. Rings of sapphire and platinum glittered on his fingers. A pendant of a three-headed manticore rested on his breast while his eyes were made more striking, surrounded by dark make-up.

Remus stood at his side, also in fine blue robes, the inside of the long, bell sleeves flashing silver. She'd asked him to marry her, making him a Black. Teddy was in his arms, wearing child robes, silver manitcores embroidered around the hem and collar. He must have sensed the seriousness of the situation. His hair was black, his eyes blue, matching his Uncle Sirius. Tonks and Marissa wore identical female robes. They were dark blue, a silver belt wrapped twice around their waists. Marissa had an additional silver circlet around her brow, marking her as Heir.

"Hurry," Sirius said quickly. He held a lion figuring. "It's almost time."

Tonks and Remus shared a smile. Sirius may look like an adult and Lord of the family, but he'd never stop acting like the child he was inside. They all took the portkey and at exactly 6:01am they disappeared.

**xXx**

Luna felt the universe singing loudly, so loudly she thought it'd be impossible to hear anything else. Just before she clapped her hands to her ears, everything fell silent. The hush was electrified, expectant.

"Are you okay?" Miles Bletchy-Harper asked. He, his husband, and wife all wore the gorgeous pure white robes with the dark purple embroidery of the majestic archer on their backs; the symbol of the Harper family. Amethyst was beaded through their hair and sparkled in the starlight.

"It's time," she answered, practically floating in her extreme excitement. She wore the pale blue robes of the Lovegood line, a Pegasus in flight swooping down from one shoulder in red. A braided rope hung low around her hips in the same bold color.

"For what exactly, Miss…" Minerva stopped abruptly in mid-sentence as the tall oak tree in the center of the courtyard began to shrink into the form of a person.

"Neville!" Filius Flitwick cried out, holding tight to his sister, Madigan's, hand. They shared happy smiles, long worried about this boy.

Neville bowed. He looked splendid in his brown robes with gold trim. "Thank you for being ready. If you would…" He held out what was obviously a portkey.

"Us, too?" Dobby squeaked. Winky trembled at his side with wide disbelieving eyes.

"Yes. You are invited. Omi, of the Snape Household, is waiting to explain."

"Will _we_ get an explanation?" Minerva demanded. She looked like a queen in her heavy, blood red robes. A silver sphinx was embroidered, curled around her stomach. For once, her hair was down in an intricate braid that was threaded through with silver ribbon and pearls.

"You will. Now hurry." Neville again extended the gold lion.

Miles was the first to touch it, followed quickly by his spouses. The others brought their hands to the gold figuring, and a moment later they all disappeared.

**xXx**

Severus appeared on a hill without warning. The two men eyeing each other warily snapped to attention, wands drawn. Then their mouths fell open. Their former teacher had on a rich green ceremonial tunic with a rearing stallion in black across his lean chest, black slacks, shinning boots, and a circlet around his brow. He looked impressive despite it obviously being Muggle attire. It was a shock to the system, seeing Professor Snape in anything but black Wizarding robes, but the arched eyebrow and glinting glare was very familiar.

"Sir?" Blaise Zabini choked. His wife would never believe him when he got home.

"I hope you will not disparage the guest rights bestowed to you in such a manner once we arrive," Severus responded lowly. Both hastily lowered their wands.

"I am honored by this prestigious invitation," Cory Fenwick said quickly. He had a suspicion what this was about and was desperate to be allowed further.

"You both are." Severus scowled. He hadn't approved of the last two invites, but Blaise was a childhood friend of Draco's and had tried to stop the other Slytherins at the final battle from betraying Hogwarts. As for Fenwick, Cory had made an impression on Shadow, and his son had requested his presence. "Should either of you cause even the smallest problem, I will make it _my_ problem. Is that clear?"

"Understood," Blaise rasped, face deathly pale. He knew how Severus handled problems.

Without another word, Severus extended the roaring lion. The two men touched it with a single finger, and then they were gone.

**xXx**

Twenty-seven figures appeared simultaneously in the dark meadow. The smell of the sea twinned with the scent of the luxurious grass forming a thick carpet under their feet. Severus stepped in front of the shocked group. George and Neville moved up to stand at his shoulders.

"Thank you for your patience," Severus began. His dark eyes sparkled in the dim light, the sky above them turning the distinct shade of pre-dawn: a gentle grey-blue. "You've been called here to bear witness to a sacred joining. This morn a worthy young man enters the Snape family. I ask those who come to this glade with doubts in their heart over the union of Draco Black and Shadow Potter-Snape to speak now or forever hold your peace."

A murmur spread through the group as those who didn't know Shadow was also Harry Potter discovered who had already known. Still, no one spoke above a whisper in fear of Severus thinking they were speaking a protest. The dark-eyed man let the excited whispers continue for a few minutes before continuing.

"If you would please follow young Longbottom and George Weasley to your places, we shall begin."

He then gestured to Sirius. Lord Black stepped up beside him. Both struck elegant poses as the sky began to lighten by degrees with every passing moment. The fevered whispers became louder even as Neville and George separated the crowd into two groups.

"Did you know?"

"A wedding!"

"Why didn't he tell us sooner?"

"Oh, this is incredible!"

Sirius glanced at the man at his side. Once they'd been enemies. "Are you ready? In a few minutes, we'll be family."

"As long as that's the last time you say so, then yes," Severus answered wryly.

Sirius laughed and clasped his shoulder.

The Weasleys – Arthur, Molly, Bill, Fleur, their unborn child, Ginny, and George – Hermione Granger, and the Harpers – Rogan, Lillian, and Miles – stood on one side of a golden rope hanging between two five-feet tall quartz crystals that were placed fifteen feet apart. Two more crystals mirrored these, creating an aisle five feet wide. Luna Lovegood, the three elves – Omi, Dobby, and Winky – Minerva McGonagall, Filius and Madigan Flitwick, and the Blacks – Marissa, Remus, Tonks, and Teddy – stood on this side, making the two groups an even eleven on each side.

Severus moved down the aisle toward Neville Longbottom who stood just past an archway that became visible as the sky brightened with gold light. The arch was a perfect carving of clear, unblemished quartz that stood eight feet tall, was four inches thick, with one foot wide sides clear as glass.

Within it, diamonds took fire gloriously, echoing the sky. They were of all sizes and colors, and as the light hit them the quartz refined and scattered the beautiful fiery light into hundreds of gorgeous rainbows. The witnesses drew breath as one, speechless at the sight. Severus took up position to the right of the arch just as Shadow dropped the veil hiding him from sight. Soft sounds of awe escaped the crowd.

The eighteen-year-old stood tall, his curls were oiled and tamed, a dozen small emeralds shimmering like beads throughout. A thin golden circlet sat comfortably on his brow. Long black lashes were darkened with eyeliner, making the two-colored eyes practically glow in his beautiful face. Around his slender shoulders sat a thick cloak. White on the outside with a large golden Griffin emblazoned on the back, the inside shimmered with a delicate geometric pattern embroidered with golden thread.

Underneath the glorious cloak, he wore Muggle pants, boots, and a dark green tunic that matched his father's. Shadow's was sleeveless, however, while Severus's was long-sleeved. The tunic reached mid-thigh and a wide black leather belt fit his waist perfectly. On each wrist, beautiful golden gauntlets shone brightly with the Potter Griffin etched into the metal. Full lips twitched up in a shy smile as one blue eye and one green stared intently down the aisle. Everyone turned to look at what had his attention.

Draco Black stood beside Sirius, both men smiling, pride radiating off them. The sky blushed with delicate pinks and orange as the two men moved toward the sparkling arch. Grey eyes glowed as they held Shadow's gaze without once looking away. He looked as amazing as his soon to be husband, putting everyone else to shame.

Draco's white blond hair was braided into a short queue at the back of his neck, dew-drop sapphires hung from his ears. Wizarding robes of dark blue clung tight to his chest and waist before loosening at his hips to fall in elegant drapes that swept the ground gently. On his biceps, two silver arm bands glittered against the silken, long sleeves. Matching silver rings flashed on each long finger. The Black manticore blazed silver across his back.

Sirius took up position to the left, mirroring Severus on the other side, as Draco stepped under the glorious archway and faced Shadow. The crowd held their breath in eager anticipation.

Neville lifted both broad hands to the sky and then to the Earth. He took Draco's hand with his right, Shadow's with his left. "We are gathered here today in the presence of the elements and magic, of friends and family, to witness the marriage of these two souls. Shadow Potter-Snape, do you still stand by your request for Draco's hand in the holiest of partnerships?"

"I do," Shadow answered steadily.

"For how long do you swear this oath to Draco Black?"

"Until death and beyond. I pledge myself to him forever." A flush of excitement stained his cheeks and his hand tightened reflexively around Neville's.

"And you, Draco Black, do you stand by your acceptance of Shadow as your life-partner?"

"I do." Draco smiled lovingly at the man who held his heart.

"For how long do you swear this oath to Shadow Potter-Snape?"

"Until death and beyond," he answered with utter certainty. "I pledge myself to him forever."

The sun crested the horizon and the two men released Neville, their hands holding tight to each other without prompting. Neville grinned, unable to contain his own emotions.

"Who do you appoint as honor guards of this vow, to warn you if you begin to wander away from the side of the partner you've chosen of your own free will?"

"I ask Lord Black to guard my faithfulness," Draco answered.

"I ask Lord Snape to guard my faithfulness," Shadow echoed.

"Lord Black, Lord Snape." Neville glanced at the two men. "Do you accept this position, come hard times or difficulties, and do you swear to do all in your power to see this union remain true?"

"I swear to uphold this duty as guardian and to never falter, no matter the obstacles," Sirius swore proudly.

"I swear to uphold this duty as guardian and to never falter, no matter the obstacles," Severus intoned.

"Then watch, Guardians, as your charges become one." Neville turned to Shadow. "Do you have a token to symbolize your commitment?"

The sun was now perfectly cut in half, a smoldering red orb on the horizon. Shadow released Draco's hands to cup his own. He summoned a chestnut-sized diamond polished into a perfect sphere. A delicate cage of gold attached it to a long chain. Draco bowed his head as Shadow slipped it around his neck. The diamond lay directly above his heart.

Gently, Shadow cupped it in one palm. "Your love for me has been tested a thousand times and was proven a thousand times. I can think of nothing to give you of equal worth, but I give you my breath."

He blew on the precious stone with a single long exhale.

"I give you my blood."

Shadow pricked his finger and allowed a single drop to touch the pendant, which became ruby-red as the blood absorbed fully.

"I give you my heart."

He let the necklace fall back against Draco's chest and covered it with his hand. It grew warm. Nothing would ever cool it.

"From this day forth, Draco, I am yours."

Draco practically glowed, his face filled with so much emotion. Tears slid down his cheeks, sparkling in the light of dawn. Taking a deep breath of his own, he lifted Shadow's hands and kissed the backs of both.

"Your offering has been accepted," Neville said unnecessarily. "Draco, do you have a token to symbolize your commitment?"

He nodded, throat too tight to speak yet, and lifted his hands. Gently, he removed all the rings from his right hand and placed the precious platinum bands on Shadow's left fingers. Then he did the same with their other hands. He did it slowly, deliberately. The gesture obviously significant, and those watching held their breath waiting to be told what it meant.

"I give you these rings to remind you that my hands are yours, their only purpose to build your happiness, the only source of mine. Shadow, my everything, I will love you with all that I am for an eternity and more."

Tears and choked cries came from the crowd, all touched by the beautiful tokens from both. Even Severus's eyes were suspiciously bright. Shadow bit his lip as he stared at the ten rings he'd been gifted with. Trembling slightly, he lifted Draco's hands and kissed the backs.

Neville, grinning broadly, clasped the couple's shoulders. "I pronounce you married, husband and husband, partners, Shadow and Draco Potter-Snape for as long as your vows last."

Simultaneously, Shadow flung his arms around his husband's neck and Draco stepped forward to wrap his arms around his husband's waist. Then they were kissing passionately, the sun rising fully into the sky and flooding the glade with the full light of day. Carried along, the crowd cried out ecstatically with cheers and catcalls.

Neville laughed and reached with his magic. Wildflowers of every hue exploded into bloom, perfuming the air. George cast a wind charm that sent hundreds of loose petals soaring into the air as beautiful confetti. Severus conjured a matching Potter cape and settled it about the oblivious Draco's shoulders, while Sirius dissolved the silver manticore on the blond's robes, making the thread move to the front to outline the rearing Snape black stallion. The leftover silver moved to outline the same stallion on Shadow's tunic.

The two newlyweds finally broke apart, gasping for air. They were both flushed, their faces and eyes alive. Neville had gotten everyone into a line, so they would have a chance to greet and congratulate the couple without overwhelming them. Severus and Sirius stood at their backs, ready to act if Shadow became uncomfortable with the many hugs, tears, and excited questions that were soon to follow. It took over an hour but seemed to pass in a blur.

"Am I good or am I good?" George asked as he stepped up.

Shadow hugged him tightly. "Thank you. This wouldn't have been possible without you."

"Don't mention it," George said softly, holding him just as tightly.

Instead of bitching at Weasley again hugging _his_ husband, Draco did something unexpected. "Thank you, Weasley. It was a beautiful ceremony, very elegant."

The redhead grinned. "So where's the party at?"

Draco rolled his eyes. "There's a path over there that leads to a large pavilion by a stream. There's plenty of food and drink, I assure you."

"And dancing, don't forget that!"

"I can't believe we didn't guess," Molly gushed, crying openly. "I am so glad you're all right. I was just sick over everything." She pulled Shadow into a hug that would have been unbearably tight if it weren't for Draco keeping hold of his waist, preventing her from getting her arms all the way around his slender chest.

"I'm sorry. I was in a coma. You won't tell anyone that I was Harry Potter, will you?"

"Of course not," Arthur reassured. "We owe you a lot. The least we can do is this."

"I knew it!" Miles grinned smugly. "Congratulations."

"Well, I didn't!" Lillian shook her head. "To think, we had Harry Bloody Potter living in the dungeons."

"Thank you," Rogan said warmly, clasping Shadow's hands. "For saving Miles. I am in your debt. If either of you ever need anything, call on me."

"I missed you!" Marissa squeezed Shadow's waist with her thin arms. "I'm sorry I didn't understand it was you the whole time, Shadow."

"I'm sorry I've been gone so much," he answered. He'd had mixed feelings about the little girl before the coma, but now he just felt a strong affection.

"Am I still part of the pack?"

"Of course," Draco reassured. He bent to kiss her cheek.

"You're our little sister," Shadow told her, also kissing her cheek.

"Good." She smiled up at them for a moment before becoming serious. "You're sill my angel, too. You saved me."

"I'm glad I did." Shadow felt the guilt over killing her parents disappear at last. Gone was the frightened, underweight, abused toddler. In her place stood a happy, healthy child.

"Congratulations, you two!" Tonks hugged and kissed them both.

"We have a gift for you back at home," Remus told them with a sly grin. "I think you'll like it."

"Pretty!" Teddy reached for the warm diamond around Draco's neck. His hair and eyes turned the exact same shade.

"Oh no! Not the imp again!" Tonks cried in dismay and hurried him away.

Draco and Shadow snickered.

"Shadow, Draco, congratulations," Hermione said tearfully. "I'm so happy for you both."

"Thanks, Herm." Shadow pulled her into a hug. Only the second one he had instigated. "How are you?"

"Better," she promised. "I need to talk to you later when you have a moment, though."

"Now?"

"No. In a few days." Hermione hugged Draco. "Take care of him."

"I will," he answered, startled by her embrace.

"Well, you certainly made an entrance," Ginny said with a smirk, hands on hips. "Where've you been?"

"Draco's been taking care of me. After the battle, I was in a coma."

Ginny felt immediately guilty for all the bad thoughts she'd had about Shadow abandoning them. "I'm sorry to hear that. I hope your future together is very happy."

"Oh, it will be," Draco responded with an easy smile.

"You both look so beautiful," Fleur gushed. "The ceremony was incredible."

"Congratulations," Bill added with a hug for both of them. Neither of them were bothered by his altered features. "May you be as happy in love as I am."

"Thanks." Shadow smiled shyly.

"Congratulations on your pregnancy," Draco responded with sincerity. "Is everything going well?"

"Yes, no problems," Fleur answered happily, a hand on her rounded stomach.

"Well, I have to say today has been remarkable." Minerva kissed their cheeks. "Thank you for inviting me. I will never forget this moment. It will give me hope for years to come."

"Thank you," they chorused.

"Incredible ceremony, boys! Quite the bit of magic, Shadow. I'm impressed," Flitwick exclaimed.

"Severus helped me with the spells." Shadow grinned with pride as he looked again at the red diamond.

"The flowers are beautiful, Neville, but I must say seeing you once more was even better," Madigan told the young man standing at Shadow's side.

"I think I'll be around more often," he said with a smile.

"Good thing. I need my brother," Shadow added.

"Shadow, Draco, you make a beautiful couple. Thank you for inviting me," Cory said with a deep bow. "It was truly a once in a lifetime opportunity."

"I learned so much from you. And you welcomed me when others weren't so willing," Shadow explained.

"I'll be a good friend," he promised.

"We'll see," Draco countered gently. He would give the guy a chance for Shadow, but that didn't mean he wouldn't be careful.

"Dray! I'm so happy you got your wish." Blaise hugged him. "You always wanted to be a knight in shining armor. Shadow may not be a princess, but you seem content and that's all that matters."

"Enough," Draco snapped, blushing. "I was eight when I said that."

Shadow laughed loudly. "Welcome, Blaise. We'll have to talk soon."

Blaise winked as Draco scowled.

"And so the world can continue to keep turning." Luna skipped up to them.

"Had it stopped?" Shadow asked with a friendly smile. Draco rolled his eyes.

"Oh yes. The world stood still, waiting for your Spring to begin and bring warmth back to the Earth." She waved at Neville. "Thanks for remembering to get me."

He inclined his head. "I always remember you, Luna."

"Will you dance with me, too?"

Neville laughed. "We'll see."

Shadow and Draco shared a thoughtful glance.

The three elves stood excitedly before them.

"Thank you for coming," Shadow began. "You have done a lot for us. Dobby and Winky, believe it or not, you helped us fight our enemies. Without you, we probably wouldn't have won."

"And Omi," Draco continued softly. "You're a part of the family. During the years Shadow dreamed, you took care of us. Thank you."

All three began crying before they disappeared with loud cracks, presumably to work the party. Music and laughing drifted up from the path. Severus clasped Shadow's shoulder while Sirius did the same to Draco.

"Let's party!" the childlike man shouted.

Severus sneered but agreed. "Yes. I could use a drink." He looked down on his son. "I am very proud of you."

"Thanks, Dad," Shadow answered tearfully. He hugged him and accepted the kiss Severus placed on his forehead.

"Do you have a thing for Luna?" Draco asked Neville as they made their way down the path.

"Why do you ask?"

"You helped plan my wedding. It's only fair if I get to help plan yours."

Neville blushed bright red. "That's not going to be any time soon."

"But it will happen," Sirius pressed with a grin.

"No one knows the future," Neville muttered, still blushing.

"I do," Draco argued. He grabbed Shadow and kissed him, a promise of much more to come.

"Oh yeah?" Shadow pulled away playfully. "That you'll get old and fat?"

The others laughed as Draco mock-growled and attacked his husband, tickling him mercilessly.

**xXx**

The party lasted over twelve hours. Filled with joyous celebration, they ate, drank, and toasted throughout the day. Songs were sung, dances were danced, until people were collapsing, breathless, into chairs. Questions were answered, stories were told, all softened so as not to bring darkness into the glorious white pavilion. It seemed like the laughter never ceased, neither did the newlywed's kisses.

Only when full dark came, the sun an hour below the horizon, did everyone go home. The next morning would be Monday, and everyone had to go back to their families and work. However, they took with them a light, burning steadily within them, that wouldn't go out for many days.

**xXx**

**(** _song that follows is Holding On by Avril Lavigne_ **)**

"Are you tired?" Draco asked. They were home, finally out of the ceremonial clothes and in comfortable silk pajamas. Tomorrow they would begin their honeymoon tour of the world where they would visit all the places Draco had promised.

"I'm still keyed up," Shadow admitted. He eyed his husband, lust burning in his belly, but before he could make his move, Draco took his hand.

"Come. I have something for you."

Shadow let Draco lead him to the music room, curious. There, on his piano, was new sheet music.

"Will you play it for me?" Draco asked, almost shyly.

Willing to see where this went, Shadow moved forward and sat on the bench. He ran through a few notes here and there before he got the hang of it. Then he began at the beginning. It was a beautiful melody, slow and rhythmic but promising more.

"You're not alone. Together we stand."

Shadow's eyes flashed to Draco who had begun singing, his voice low and beautiful.

"I'll be by your side. You know I'll take your hand. / When it gets cold and it feels like the end, / there's no place to go, you know I won't give in."

Tears stung his eyes. Draco was _singing_ to him. He'd written a song. Shadow had to bite his lip to concentrate on the rising tempo and keep from being overwhelmed. Draco grew louder, more passionate.

"… No, I won't give in. / Keep holding on. / Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through. / Just stay strong. / Cause you know I'm here for you, I'm here for you. / There's nothing you can say, nothing you can do. / There's no other way when it comes to the truth, so / keep holding on. / Cause we'll make it through, we'll make it through."

"Oh, Draco." Shadow whispered, beyond touched. He had no idea how long his love had been working on this. Just for him. And it was perfect.

The melody played for a bit on its own. Draco sat beside him, facing out, his back to the keys. His fingers gently stroked down Shadow's cheek as he began to sing again, quieter, slower, like in the beginning.

"So far away, I wish you were here, / before it's too late. This could all disappear. / Before the doors close and it comes to an end, / with you by my side, I will fight and defend. / Yeah…"

The temp picked up into the chorus for a second time. Draco's beautiful voice thickened with feeling, and Shadow could feel his eyes on his face, warming his skin.

"Keep holding on. / Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through. / Just stay strong. / Cause you know I'm here for you, I'm here for you. / There's nothing you can say, nothing you can do, / there's no other way when it comes to the truth, so / keep holding on. / Cause you know we'll make it through, we'll make it through."

As Draco's voice trailed off and the last note faded away, Shadow felt an overwhelming need, to make Draco his physically, to make him scream with the happiness he gave Shadow so freely. "I loved it," he whispered roughly. Then he turned and pounced.

Draco fell sideways, twisting to catch Shadow's body with his own. His back hit the floor and his breath whooshed out of his lungs in surprise. Shadow took it into his own by breathing in deeply. His eyes practically glowed with desire as he dove, his mouth kissing, consuming, possessing. Draco instinctively accepted the thrusting tongue, too shocked to think, only feel as his husband grabbed and yanked, ripping their shirts open. His skin burned deliciously wherever Shadow touched and he moaned loudly.

Shadow tore his mouth away from those tempting lips and moved to trace patterns onto the perfect skin of Draco's chest and stomach. He wanted to travel every inch with tongue and breath, tasting, memorizing. Draco could only gasp and groan, utterly focused on the trails blazed across his skin with moist heat.

Teeth grazed a nipple. Draco arched, a sharp cry escaping his swollen lips. Shadow looked up. Draco's cheeks were flushed, his hair wild, his eyes fever bright. Every taste of salt, and sweat, and _Draco_ made him hungrier, not less. Shadow scattered bites over the perfect flesh, marking it, making his claim physical as well as emotional.

Panting now, Draco writhed, completely shocked at the dominating, hungry behavior. There was no denying the heat between them. All the times they came together had been explosive. This, though, was something more and Draco thrilled in it. He gasped and cried out in wild abandon as Shadow mapped all his sensitive areas and marked them clearly.

Vision throbbing in time with his heart, almost gone with need for the teasing to end, Draco begged for more, words tumbling from his mouth in a discordant rush. "Please, Shadow, Merlin! Please, baby, don't stop, more, yes, oh!"

Shadow bent lower, knocking Draco's legs wider apart with the back of his hands. Then he was sucking on the pale, inner thigh, leaving yet another mark as two long fingers pressed steadily into Draco's tight entrance.

"Fuck! Shadow!" Draco's body pressed back onto the fingers despite the pain. He was burning alive, on the cusp of cumming, held there for much too long. He was almost sobbing with desperation. " _Please_ , Shadow…"

Wandless magic slicked the tight passage, making the second thrust of his fingers smoother, deeper. Draco groaned, deep and long. His hands fisted as sensation flooded through him. Enraptured, Shadow drank in every flex of Draco's thighs, every expression on his love's sweat-damp face, every thrust of Draco's hips as he moved his fingers in and out.

He watched the rippling of Draco's stomach, the tightening of his chest as Draco’s hands grasped futilely at the floor for something to hold on to. He memorized the glistening contours and sharp angles, every hoarse cry and plea for more. Daring, drugged, riding the wave of power and adrenaline, Shadow leaned forward to quickly swipe his tongue from base to tip of Draco's swollen, rigid cock.

Draco screamed.

Shadow grinned wolfishly, a sharp bitter taste tingling on his tongue, egging him on, making his need rise to a fever pitch. "Beautiful…" he rasped, thickly. His fingers left that warm, delicious heat.

Draco cried out again, this time in desperate denial, eyes wide and maddened with lust.

"Shhh." Shadow kissed him hard, heart racing. "Will I be the first, my Serpentine Prince?"

Every sense alive and burning, Draco almost came at the provocative words whispered against his fever hot skin. Words he never thought Shadow would utter.

"I'm going to be inside you," Shadow continued with relish. He bit at the sharp collarbone under his lips, making Draco yelp. "I want to know. Will I be the first to get inside your skin? The first to fuck you?"

"Yes! YES! Shadow, yes! The first, no one else!"

Shadow's eyes were blown open, pupils dilated wide. Draco, only his, spread open, waiting for him. He hooked a long leg over his shoulder, bringing it up to Draco's heaving chest. The grey eyes were huge, knowing what was coming. With one hard thrust, one relentless push, Shadow breached Draco, slid into the tight, tight heat. They both yelled, both arching in pleasure so intense it was almost agony.

A segment of time passed in a blur of humid heat, bone deep sparks of pleasure, loud cries, and a merciless rhythm that consumed them utterly. Nothing existed outside of sliding skin, desperate gasps, and yearning hungry mouths.

Vaguely, Shadow became aware of his forehead pressed to the floor beside Draco's head. Draco was crying, or was that pleading? One forearm was pressed to the floor, giving him leverage to push into Draco’s body again and again. The other held Draco's leg bent, pinned between their two sweat-soaked chests. Shadow thrust deep inside, gloriously piercing Draco's body over and over. Each time a wave shuddered through him and a hoarse yell escaped his clenched teeth. Draco whimpered, gasping, tears leaking down his face. So close… they were both so fucking close… to release, to madness, that glorious small death…

Shadow growled and turned his head sharply, biting Draco's neck, tongue pressing against the raging pulse point. Draco came in a violent burst, a scream erupting from his throat. Shadow flung his head back, lifting his upper body as Draco spasmed around him. He groaned, too overwhelmed to scream, stars and sparks, blinding him, shaking the world. It scrambled his brain until he couldn't tell up from down, taste from sound, touch from sight. It was magnificent!

Draco clawed his way back from the looming edge of unconsciousness. Shadow was draped limply across his stomach. Draco’s heavy arms lifted automatically to hold the brunet safe. Draco’s heart still raced and stuttered in his chest. He breathed deeply for a few moments, trying to steady its rhythm, slow its beat. Shadow nuzzled his neck over what felt like a huge hickey and Draco grinned stupidly, flooded with endorphins and happily drunk with them.

"Why is it we can never do this in bed?" Shadow grumbled. He wasn't looking forward to getting up, sweet exhaustion beckoned, but the wood floor was digging into his hips painfully.

"Remind me to sing to you more often," Draco responded, slurring a bit.

Shadow laughed and reluctantly sat up. "I love you, you know that?"

"I think I got the message." Draco carefully stood, pain frizzling along his nerves. It felt remarkably like pleasure and a delicious shiver ran through him from his toes to his head.

"You okay?" Shadow anxiously took his hand.

"I've never been better," Draco answered honestly and stole a quick kiss from bruised lips. "Let's go to bed, husband-mine, and tomorrow we'll have breakfast in the bath."

Shadow snickered, remembering how he felt after Draco had taken him. It was only fair that this time it'd been Draco's turn to ache from the inside for days. He linked their hands together, the rings on his fingers glittering. "To bed then."

Draco wrapped an arm around Shadow's waist, reveling in the fact that Shadow would be in his bed, beside him, every night and every morning for the foreseeable future.

_What a wonderful way to begin,_ Draco thought contentedly, pulling Shadow down into his arms amid warm sheets and soft pillows.

And there they fell into an exhausted, dreamless sleep, wrapped around each other with the dawn of their Spring stretching out ahead of them.

**Chapter end.**


	6. What the Future Holds

**A/N:** This chapter moves pretty fast and is shorter than normal. Still, I felt it had the right feel for the last chapter. Hope you enjoy it! Thank you for following the series and for all the support! I'm going to miss this!

**What The Future Holds**

_~ August 1998 ~_

Colors splayed around Shadow as if he'd stepped into a spectacularly clear and enhanced photograph: the white-gold sand, green-blue of the gently rolling waves, the beach-goers' swimsuits in every bright hue, the sky hung above them a blue so deep Shadow hardly thought it was real. Salt and coconut sunscreen flavored his tongue. Slick oils, sticky sweat, and gritty sand textured his warm skin. Summer heat pervaded every inch until he lay limp and purring. The cries of playing children, roaring waves, and pleasant chatter turned serenaded his ears. He was in heaven.

Rolling onto his side, Shadow gazed down at Draco, the one who'd made this possible. His husband dozed peacefully, his pale hair shimmering in the sun. Pink tinted his cheeks and nose, the white lashes of his eyes standing out against the red color. His lips were parted gently as he breathed slow and deep.

"Swim with me," Shadow requested softly.

"Hmmm…"

Shadow trailed his fingers across a mostly hairless chest, the sand on his fingers dragging rough as a cat’s tongue across sensitive pink nipples. The sleepy hum transformed into a lazy murmur of pleasure. Grey eyes opened a fraction.

"Let's swim," Shadow repeated with a smile.

"I'm quite comfortable, thanks."

Shadow’s tongue darted out and lashed at the stiffening pink bud. Draco growled, eyes opening further. Twinkling two-colored eyes that matched the waves at their feet - crystal blue and green - gazed at him hungrily.

"Swim with me," Shadow demanded. He stood and stretched slowly, knowing he had his husband's full attention as he moved toward the cool water.

They were well into the fifth month of their honeymoon. This was their fifth honeymoon spot, Draco taking him somewhere exotic just as he promised every four weeks. It had taken time, but Shadow had finally embraced his sensual nature. With the removal of the last of his fear, his sexual appetite had returned with a vengeance as if to make up for lost time. Draco wasn't complaining.

Sure enough, the blond lifted onto his elbows to watch as Shadow slowly walked into the water, letting it wrap around him, caressing and cooling his heated skin. While Draco’s skin burned pink and red, Shadow tanned into a warm butterscotch color that the blond found particularly delicious.

Shadow turned to face his love, running his dripping hands through his hair, the sun sparkling off the beads of moisture that clung to his curves and angles. It was the final straw. Draco rose smoothly, thighs flexing, as he strode across the sand. Shadow grinned, eyes heavy as he tilted his head and exposed his slender neck.

"Tease," Draco growled and pounced.

Shadow laughed, heart light, as they crashed into an oncoming wave and went under. Plunged into silence, a world of their own, Shadow clung to the broad shoulders of his husband and wrapped his legs around Draco’s lean hips.

"Only if I don't follow through," he argued when they broke through the surface.

He let the next wave push his body against his lover’s abs. The rolling movement sent a thrill of pleasure along Shadow’s nerves. He bit his lips as the water thrust him rhythmically forward with each gentle rise of the water. Draco had already cast a wandless spell to remove the salt in the water around them, so the friction was absolutely heavenly instead of painful.

"I love you," Shadow breathed, his lips descending to capture Draco's mouth.

Draco's hand lifted to cup his husband's rear to help him rock and thrust, the other tangling possessively in the messy, wet curls. Slow and languid, they kissed and licked and thrust until they both toppled over the edge of orgasm, holding each other close.

**xXx**

"Order an appetizer. I need to use the loo."

Shadow smiled easily, eyes already on the menu.

Draco lingered a moment longer. The sun had long ago set, the sound of the ocean now a distant backdrop. The night was warm with a cool summer breeze that made the small white lights strung along the ceiling sway and dip. The smell of rich food, the low murmurs of conversation, and the clinks of silverware and glasses gave the scene an almost surreal feeling. Shadow stood out sharply real amongst it all.

He wore loose cotton pants that hung low on his hips, brown sandals, and a dark blue, button-up shirt. His curls lay in disarray, still damp from their shower. The lines of his face were smooth and soft, free of any tension, his expression suffused with simple joy. It had taken many weeks for happiness to sink bone-deep. Weeks before Shadow could trust it and not feel like it would end any second. It had taken constant reassurance and reinforcement, which Draco had actually enjoyed. Draco took great pleasure in taking care of his lover. And here was the result.

Shadow was out in public, amongst strangers. His flashbacks were few and far between, as were his nightmares. He no longer flinched from unexpected touches. Best yet, he actually enjoyed their love making and even instigated it as he had that afternoon in the ocean. There were still a few things out of bounds in the bedroom and probably always would be, but this was better than anything Draco had ever expected. So it was understandable that he felt a bit _angry_ with anything that threatened their hard-earned peace.

The wizard with his magical camera didn't have time to scream, let alone Apparate, before Draco's fist came out of the darkness behind him and yanked him back. Draco slammed the reporter against the alley wall hard enough for stars to explode behind the man’s eyes. Gasping, choking, he stared up in terror at Draco's fang-filled snarl. His hands clawed desperately at the tightening fist around his throat.

"I'm only letting you live so you can spread the word. We're off limits. Should you come back or prove an ineffective messenger, I will hunt you down and correct my mistake. Understand?"

The wizard's feet kicked feebly, the distorted features turning red then blue.

With a soft his of disgust, Draco released him. "Get lost and never come back."

The man disappeared instantly with a whimper.

Draco rolled his shoulders and moved silently through the night back toward the restaurant where Shadow waited. As he approached their little table, Shadow caught sight of him and grinned.

"I ordered the sautéed mushrooms. It sounds delicious."

"I agree," Draco said with an indulgent smile as he lifted his husband's ringed fingers and kissed the knuckles.

"Are you talking about me or the mushrooms?"

Draco lifted an eyebrow. "Nothing can compare to you, but I suppose the mushrooms will do."

Shadow laughed.

**xXx**

_~ March 1999 ~_

Ginny unlocked the door to her London flat in a daze. Twice the key missed the hole. Eventually, she came inside and almost immediately went sprawling. "Mione," she yelled furiously. "I told you not to leave your books by the door!"

"They're not! They're by the desk!"

Ginny scowled. They were also in front of the door. Why did she need so many books anyway? Sighing, she followed the voice toward the kitchen and leaned in the doorway, her arms crossed. "You're not trying to cook again, are you?"

Hermione flipped her long hair over her shoulder with a haughty sniff. "I bet you'll love it."

Ginny doubted it. Her roommate was great with potions but for some reason the skill didn't transfer, which resulted in a lot of take-out because the bushy-haired woman always pouted when Ginny was able to cook something edible.

Unable to maintain her glare, Ginny began to grin. "I passed. My apprenticeship is over. I'm officially an Auror."

Hermione spun around, sending some type of sauce flying to splatter the wall. Then she was across the room and flung her arms around Ginny's neck. "Oh! I knew you could do it! And in only a year and a half, too! That's incredible!"

Ginny laughed and stroked the frizzy curls once. She'd secretly developed feelings for the brilliant woman in her arms. After she'd graduated Hogwarts and Hermione had saved her from having to live at home by offering to be her roommate, they'd become best friends. Ginny coaxed the bookworm to be more social and Hermione gave Ginny a sense of home and comfort that Ginny still needed.

"I want to tell you something." Ginny pulled back and smiled into warm brown eyes. "I love you."

Hermione smiled. ”I love you, too, Gin.”

Ginny wasn't very good with words, never had been, so she leaned forward and kissed Hermione instead.

Hermione tensed, but then she uttered a soft sigh, her breath tasting like mint, and opened her mouth to the kiss.

Their breasts pressed softly against each other as Ginny pulled the other woman closer. Tongues gently thrusting and twirling together, Ginny quickly found her temperature rising, her heart thudding faster. Quickly, she pulled the blouse from Hermione's skirt and slid her hands up the soft, smooth skin of the other woman's back. Her hand unhooked her bra and glided around to cup a breast so much fuller than her own.

"Leave dinner. I'm taking you to bed," she decided.

Dilated eyes stared back at her, mouth wet, lips swollen. "Are you sure about this?"

"Are _you_ sure?"

Hermione stared at her for a moment before she turned and switched off the stove. With her back to Ginny, she pulled her shirt and bra of before turning around. Ginny felt heat curl in her belly. She reached out, caught the delicate scholar's hand and tugged her forward as she bent to place a kiss on the top curve of the gorgeous chest on display before her.

"I'll take that as a yes," she murmured and kissed Hermione hungrily, pent up lust making her forceful and demanding.

Hermione gasped and groaned as calloused hands slid and grabbed and stroked her breasts, neck, belly, and thighs. By the time they were both naked and in bed, the sheets were damp with sweat and she felt as if she were on fire. Wet fingers stroked her clit, while others pressed at the inside of her passage. A mouth bit and sucked at her nipple and she arched with a strained cry. An orgasm rocked through her, causing bone-deep tremors as she let go of everything, surrendering completely to the other woman.

Dazed, she blinked to see Ginny smirking, self-satisfied, as she licked her fingers clean. Hermione rolled Ginny onto her back and slid down the muscular yet feminine body. Languid and thorough, Hermione made her way to the nest of short red curls between Ginny’s thighs, then it was the redhead’s turn to shudder and moan. Hermione laughed.

**xXx**

_~ March 2000 ~_

Luna twirled and ducked around and under the branches of the forest. Only when she heard the fluttering of feathers did she slow and grow quiet. Hippogriffs grazed in the clearing ahead. She watched with wide eyes and took in as much detail as she could.

The females slowly moved around the outskirts of the group, which proved they were the protectors. It was clearly a patrolling movement. As the sun reached noon, the herd turned and quickly flew off toward their nests. She sighed in pleasure.

"Why ask me to bring you close to the creatures you want to study? I can tell you all about them if you want,” Neville offered as he stepped up to her side.

"What fun would it be if you just told me all the answers? Besides, I love watching them." She spun and hugged him. "Thank you."

"You're as bad as Hagrid," Neville said with a laugh, gently tucking her hair behind her ear.

"No, silly!" She grinned and danced out of reach. "I'm almost as good as Hagrid."

"My mistake." He reached out a hand. "You ready to see the redcaps?"

"Oh, yes!" Luna took a running leap and landed in his strong arms bridal style. Her slight weight made little difference and they disappeared without a sound.

**xXx**

"Sorry we're late." Neville hugged his heart-brother, delighted by how happy Shadow looked.

"It's fine. What were you two up to?"

Neville looked down at a freshly scrubbed and formally dressed Luna. "Exploring."

The girl giggled, kissed Shadow's cheek, and disappeared into the crowd.

Neville looked around at the large white tent. It had been set up in the exact same place as it had for Shadow's wedding. Neville noticed several friends in the crowd. Draco was over by a table with the Zabinis and Severus. The Blacks were talking to Ginny and Hermione. The two women had come out a few weeks ago and Sirius was obviously harassing them. They were both blushing, but Neville knew they could handle themselves. Luna had made her way to the newly named Healer, Miles Harper, and his two spouses. George was dancing with Angelina Johnson while Katie Bell waited for them at one of the tables, talking with Headmistress McGonagall and her new husband. The tent was stock full of happy endings, it seemed.

Neville returned his attention to his best friend. "Happy two year anniversary."

"Thanks." Shadow grinned and ran a hand through his curls. He wore dress robes, but he wasn't as done up as most of the guests at the party. "It doesn't feel like that much time has passed, but at the same time it feels much longer."

"I know what you mean." He smiled. "Looks like everyone's here. Why are you hovering by the entrance?"

"I was waiting for you."

Neville shot his brother a suspicious look.

"Okay. I needed a break." Shadow shrugged. He'd come to accept his limits. He did better with people now than he had when he first woke up, but so many people focusing on him still made him break out in a cold sweat, friends or not.

Neville nodded. "I've missed talking to you. Any new gossip?"

"Hermione's studying how magical cores are formed. She's already made really brilliant discoveries, maybe even a cure for Squibs," Shadow answered with a happy smile. "And Luna, of course, is becoming more popular. Her books on magical wildlife are really astounding."

"What about George?"

"George and Fred finally told the girls the truth about the fact they are sharing their body. I hear Katie laughed in Fred's face. She'd already guessed months ago. Angelina patted George on the hand and said, 'Oh, that.'"

"That's wonderful.” Neville looked over at them with a big smile. "They deserve to be happy."

"And what about you?" Shadow looked up at him, eyes bright. "Are you happy?"

Neville blushed. "Yes."

"Good."

A roar of rage drew their attention. Draco stood dripping wet, eyes blazing as he took off after a laughing redhead. George bolted for cover and hid behind Shadow and Neville. Laughing, Shadow stepped forward to meet his enraged husband. Draco tried to go around him, but Shadow caught his arm and pressed himself against Draco's wet chest.

"Mmmm… I love it when you’re wet."

Draco blushed, his arms coming around Shadow. "Hello, Neville. George, I'll kill you later." Then he tugged Shadow toward the dance floor, dried them both wandlessly, and stepped into the flow of dancers.

"Feeling suicidal?" Neville asked, cocking an eyebrow.

Before George could reply, Luna skipped up to them. "Nev, I asked Draco if he'd be Master of the Ceremony for the wedding. He said yes!"

George gaped. "You're getting married?"

Neville blushed again and grabbed for his fiancé. "I thought we agreed we'd keep this private?"

"Why should I?" Luna laughed. "After all, I proposed that you should propose, and you did."

George laughed loudly and ran off to spread the news while Neville groaned and allowed Luna to pull him toward the dance floor.

**xXx**

_~ September 2000 ~_

"Have you heard the newest gossip?"

Shadow smiled tiredly at Miles. "No, but I'm about to."

Miles chuckled and handed his friend a cup of coffee.

They were in a warded surgery at St. Mungo's. After the anniversary, Shadow and Draco had returned to England to stay more permanently. To keep busy, Draco did research with Severus and worked hard on making Neville and Luna's wedding perfect while Shadow had decided to help Miles once a month at the hospital, turning into Seraphim and using his White magic to heal a single patient. Miles had quickly become known as a miracle worker, taking credit for Seraphim's healings as was the deal. Shadow definitely didn't want to renew the Wizarding world's attention on him.

"The second Triad of the century will be formed next spring."

Shadow grinned. He _did_ know that gossip. "The Weasley Triad, right?" Except it wasn't really a triad since George would marry Angelina and Fred was marrying Katie. "George proposed? Love is in the air."

Miles laughed. "I bet you're relieved the Longbottom wedding is over."

"Maybe Draco will talk of something else now. I love Nev and Luna, but I will be happy to leave the wedding behind. My husband can be a bit obsessive."

"No. Really?" Miles teased.

Shadow blushed. "Shut up."

"Go home." Miles helped him to his feet. "You're beat and Draco will worry if you're much later."

Shadow waved and swung his Invisibility Cloak around him. No one saw as he left the surgery. They were too busy converging on Miles and demanding to know if he'd preformed another miracle.

"Did it go well?"

Shadow sighed, muscles relaxing for the first time since he left home as Draco's arms wrapped around him. Shadow was much better, but the abuse he'd suffered would always mark him. He still hadn't taken off the cloak and he wondered idly how Draco always knew when he was around. Was it his heightened senses or something else?

"It went fine. Miles is doing well."

Draco pulled the cloak away and kissed him deeply. Shadow gasped, surprised by the heat and urgency in Draco's careful movements. Curious, he tried to ask what had gotten into his love, but he was quickly distracted as his clothes disappeared one article at a time. By the time Draco maneuvered him into the sitting room and laid him out on the chaise-lounge, all questions had fled.

Shadow cried out as teeth grazed his nipple. Skin humming with electricity, he moaned as hands groped and stoked, dragging down his sensitive sides. Draco’s hot mouth left a moist trail down his twitching stomach. Shadow’s breath hitched as a slick finger penetrated his body, Draco’s breath ghosting over his cock.

Unexpectedly, Draco swallowed him whole. Waves of heat seared him from head to toes for a long second before panic could build. Draco pulled his mouth away, knowing that was his limit. Then all coherent thought fled as Draco moved up his body and entered him with a slow, torturous thrust.

Hours later, they lay sated and limp, Draco on the chaise-lounge, legs dangling off, with Shadow resting on his chest between them. Shadow murmured something into his skin and Draco laughed at the tickling sensation.

"Can't hear you,” he murmured, voice thick and hoarse.

“Said, what's that about?"

"Do I need a reason to ravage my husband?"

"Usually make it to bed," Shadow answered sleepily. "You know how Dad feels."

"I may have wanted you in a good mood," Draco admitted.

Two bright, cat-like eyes cracked open to peer at him. "What'd you do?"

Draco put on his best puppy-eyed look. "I may have told George I'd be Master of the Ceremony for their double weddings. They plan to have one ceremony at night with George and another the following morning with Fred.”

Shadow sighed and lay his head back down.

"Love you," Draco whispered fondly, petting the gorgeous curls.

"Love you, too."

**xXx**

_~ June 2001 ~_

Severus was quite enjoying his retirement. He studied and developed new potions and improved old formulas. He had more people in his life than he ever expected, which included a son and a son-in-law who lived with him and kept him from loneliness, but there were some things he could do without.

"Uncle Sev!" A small body crashed into his legs.

Severus sighed and stroked the girl's copper curls once. "What is it this time?"

"Charlotte is going to Peru for two weeks with her family and she invited me along and Papa won't let me go!"

The incredibly long sentence grew increasingly shrill until it was practically a wail at the end. Severus winced. "Why not?" he asked, leading her to the sitting room.

"He says lots of stupid stuff. Like he needs me here and I have lessons as Black Heir to do, but he's gone all the time with his new girlfriend! Then he said I was too young! I'm eleven! Then he said Teddy missed me while I was away at Hogwarts and I should spend all summer with him and it's just not FAIR!"

 _The girl is definitely a Gryffindor,_ Severus mused. "Marissa, do stop shouting. You already have my attention."

Marissa blushed. "Sorry, Uncle Sev."

"I did miss you, but I don't mind if you go, Mari."

Severus turned his attention to the quiet six-year-old standing in the doorway. He'd grown into Remus's temperament – calm, quiet, and mischievous – but also had an obsession with strange colors like his mother. The child could change the color of any part of his body, but fortunately it would be many years yet before he could actually change his features or his body shape like Tonks.

At the moment, Teddy had dark green hair that fell to his shoulders and violet eyes with skin the color of caramel. It was rather striking and Severus frowned. Maybe he should have a talk with Remus. The boy would do better to learn to look less gorgeous. He would draw unwelcome attention otherwise.

"Thanks, Teddy." Marissa ran over to hug him tight.

"Where are your parents?" Severus asked darkly, surprised that none of the adults of Grimmauld Place had come to meet him yet.

Teddy smiled. "Mum and Dad are out to dinner. Uncle Siri was supposed to watch us, but Rosalie firecalled. She was upset and he went to make her feel better. Mari's old enough to watch me."

Severus scowled. Marissa was indeed old enough to watch Teddy for a short period, but these two together were trouble and they should always have supervision. "It's a good thing I decided to visit in that case."

"Will you talk to him, Uncle Sev?" Marissa demanded.

"Have no fear of that," he answered darkly, much to her delight. "Now how about I help you brew some potions."

Teddy clapped, excited, but Marissa was more subdued, potions was not her favorite class. Fortunately, she was smart enough to realize that if she wanted Severus to stay on her side, she'd have to keep him happy, so she didn't complain as he led the children to the potions lab.

**xXx**

Sirius arrived home content and thoroughly shagged only to meet two very unhappy parents and a smirking Severus Snape. He bore the lecture with sullen grace and scowled as Remus and Tonks went up to bed, leaving him to Snape's not so tender mercies.

"What are you doing here? Draco and Shadow having another sex marathon?" he asked, hoping to distract the man.

A look of resignation flickered over Severus's features. "They are celebrating the end of the Weasley wedding and the return of Draco's free time."

Sirius laughed, even knowing it was the worst thing he could do.

Severus's face darkened. "What's this about denying Marissa a life-learning experience?"

"Stay out of it, Snape," Sirius warned, all humor gone.

"Jealous, Black? Or maybe you're lazy and want to use your daughter to do your work for you?"

Sirius flung a nasty hex, but it was deflected with ease. "I'm a good father! Don't you dare say otherwise!"

"Who are you trying to convince?"

They dueled viciously for several long minutes. A couch exploded into thousands of splitters while a painting went up in flames. Sirius panted from his position behind a sofa chair, his shoe filling with blood from a deep gash on his calf. Severus was behind another chair, his left hand floppy and boneless.

"I don't want her so far away from me," Sirius admitted. "What if she gets into trouble?"

"You can't guard her forever. She needs to be able to stand on her own. A good father would see this opportunity for what it is. Two weeks for her to test the waters of independence before being returned to your care."

"I hate you."

Severus smiled, knowing he'd won.

**xXx**

_~ March 2002 ~_

"Shadow? What's wrong?" Neville crouched down next to his brother. They were in the clearing in the woods outside Snape House and he was fiercely glad he'd set up a ward to tell him when Shadow came to the clearing, otherwise he’d have never known Shadow needed him.

Shadow sat on the ground, his back supported by a tree. He sighed, eyes hidden by his long bangs. "I don't know what to do."

"What happened?" It'd been years since Neville had seen him look so glum.

A tired laugh escaped his lips. "I never thought I'd get to be this happy. Even if the world left me alone, the inside of my head was such a mess I didn't think peace would ever be possible. I never thought I'd get the chance to live day-to-day. To see the world with nothing more important to worry about than what's for dinner. It's been great and it's all because of Draco." Despite the happy words, Shadow pulled restlessly at the grass, his head having low.

"Did you have a fight?" Neville couldn't imagine it. Sure the two bickered sometimes, but they were still so sensitive to how close they'd come to never being together, of never having this future, that fights never lasted more than a day.

Shadow shook his head. "He hasn't said anything, but I know he needs more. I have my ability to heal, but all Draco has is me. He cleared his name of vampirism at the Ministry, so they won't try to lock him up anymore, but it's still on record that he's not fully human. No one will hire him. Without weddings to plan…” Shadow shook his head sadly.

“Draco's not unhappy," Neville reassured his brother. "At least, I never thought so."

"He could be happier," Shadow countered with a scowl. He lifted his head to meet Neville's worried gaze. "He wants a baby."

With a sigh, Neville sat next to his friend. "How do you know?"

"The way he watches families. His guarded expressions when we're told someone's expecting. Did you know Katie and Angie are pregnant?"

"What do you think about it?"

"It would make Draco happy."

Neville tried to decipher his brother's expression, but it was hard in the low light of the forest. "What do you _not_ like about the idea?"

"I don't know what I would do with a child to take care of. I was awkward around Marissa when I wasn't Seraphim. I don't even have fond memories of _being_ a kid. I'm afraid that I'll always feel uncomfortable around it, and I don't want to do that to a child."

"Draco won't make you have a baby if you're not ready," Neville said, testing the waters.

"What if I'm never ready?"

"Then you're not."

"But it means so much to Draco! He was great with Marissa and Teddy. Still is." Shadow scowled and tore up more grass. "I want him to be happy. He'd be a great father. The way he handled me when I was Boy proved that."

Neville captured one of Shadow's hands. "You shouldn't have a child just for Draco. That wouldn’t work out. In the end, Draco would be very unhappy."

Shadow peeked shyly up at him. "It might be nice. To be involved in another person's life. To have them belong with you, the way I belong with Severus now. It's not the same with Marissa or Teddy. That's the point. It's so different when it's your own kid. So it's not like I'm totally against the idea, but it’s not like I'm perfectly healed. I still have problems with people touching me and the flashbacks are better, but they aren't gone. What if I hurt the kid? Mess them up?"

Neville felt his heart melt. ”Oh, Shadow, you wouldn't mess anyone up. All families have their problems. You know that. You'd provide all the most important things – love, support, protection – and if something happened, Draco would be there to be the great father you know he'd be. You'd take care of each other. And you have Severus, me, Luna, and everyone else. You wouldn't be alone and neither would your child."

"You're awfully supportive all of the sudden," Shadow muttered quietly, scowling down at his lap.

Laughing, Neville pulled him into a one-armed hug. "If I couldn't read you by now, then I'd be hopeless. You want this. You're just afraid."

They sat in silence for several minutes. Neville relaxed and just leant his support as his brother thought hard. Eventually, Shadow smiled. "Thanks, Nev."

"Anytime," he answered honestly. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

**xXx**

"What's wrong? What happened?" Draco asked as Shadow burst through the front door. He'd been reading the newspaper quite peacefully, but now he was on his feet ready to attack whatever had upset his love.

"Nothing's wrong. I have something to tell you." Shadow grabbed his hand and made him sit down again. He sat next to him, eyes bright and intense as he searched Draco's still worried face. "Love, I know what you've been longing for lately. I agree. Maybe it's time we take the next step. Let's have a baby."

Draco could only blink in surprise, utterly speechless.

Shadow laughed, heart beating fast with fear and nerves but also determination. "I can do this. We can do this. Really, Draco. I want this, too."

"Are you sure?" he asked tightly, color blooming across his cheeks.

"You know I wouldn't say anything otherwise. I've been thinking about it for about a month. I'm afraid, but I know we have a lot to give a child. Besides, it's not like we're alone in this. We have help if we need it. So… will you have a baby with me, Draco?”

Draco pounced. He kissed Shadow thoroughly, tears burning his eyes. Shadow had no idea how happy this made him.

Shadow laughed as Draco finally released his mouth. “Happy fourth anniversary, love.”

**xXx**

_~ the following night ~_

Draco, Shadow, Neville, and Luna sat in a loose circle before the fireplace. They were all comfortable and pleasantly full from the delicious dinner Omi had cooked. Severus had agreed to give the boys the night to themselves and was either at Grimmauld Place or Hogwarts, although he didn't know why they had requested privacy. Draco and Shadow had decided to keep their plans secret until everything was more settled.

"Of course I'll do it. I'd love to be the surrogate mother!" Luna actually clapped her hands she was so happy.

"Are you sure?" Shadow asked carefully. "The procedure is still pretty new, and…” He shared a significant look with Draco before returning his attention to his friend. “You have to really be sure you'll be okay relinquishing the baby to us after you carry it for nine months."

"I heard about it last year. The results are pretty good so far," Neville offered, talking about the first part of Shadow’s disclaimer. He couldn’t really speak about the second. That was Luna’s decision.

"Except when they aren't," Shadow muttered nervously.

The procedure would take a sperm from Draco and turn it into an egg. Then they would use Shadow's sperm to fertilize it. The egg would then be placed in Luna to be carried to term. Another spell would insure that Draco's blood would be the one cycling through the baby as if he were the one really carrying it. That way there would be no chance of the baby rejecting Luna's body or vice versa, causing an abortion. Female partners could do this as well, but it was less risky since they would be able to carry the baby themselves and wouldn't need the extra blood-transfusion spell. It was all pretty amazing.

"I said yes so that's already settled." Luna leapt to her feat and ran to the floo. "Let's go!"

"Um, tomorrow will be fine," Draco assured her, although he was just as excited. "Miles will meet us at the hospital. He promised he'd keep this all private so no one will bother us." He looked over at the Longbottoms as Luna settled against her husband's side once more. "You do know that you'll have to live here until the baby's born. I don't want to miss a minute."

She shrugged with a smile. "That's okay as long as I still get to do my research."

"Only if you agree that the last two months are for resting only," Draco bargained. He didn't like the idea of the woman pregnant with his and Shadow's baby running around forests and dangerous places.

"Deal! This will be so interesting!"

**xXx**

_~ November 30th, 2002 ~_

Shadow lovingly stroked Draco's hair as he slept fitfully. Luna was eight months pregnant and the baby demanded a lot from Draco's body. He'd suffered severe hunger pains, high-blood pressure, and malnutrition throughout the pregnancy. They went to the hospital almost every week now to be sure everything was as well as could be and to make sure Draco's body had what both he and the baby needed.

Luna smirked whenever Draco complained. She'd been saved the more emotionally and physically draining affects of pregnancy and walked around chipper as ever, the added weight only causing her mild aches.

Draco opened eyes still puffy from his crying jag earlier. "Hey," he whispered sleepily.

"Hey," Shadow answered just as softly. "How are you feeling?"

"Warm."

"Mmmm," Shadow hummed, enjoying said sleepy warmth.

When they parted, Draco sighed. "I'm hungry. Again."

Shadow smiled, knowing better than to laugh. He helped Draco dress, secretly enjoying being the one to take care of Draco for a change. These last few months had changed their relationship. This whole experience had made it deeper and stronger, more balanced.

Hand-in-hand, they moved to the dining room, meeting Luna and Neville on the way. Draco immediately went to touch Luna’s large stomach, already chatting about all things baby. Shadow and Neville exchanged amused smiles as they followed the two blondes.

Severus joined them moments later. He nodded to Luna, his eyes on her stomach as if expecting her to pop.

Shadow smiled at his father. Severus had been more nervous during this whole thing than Shadow and that was saying something. Obviously, the whole thing brought back uncomfortable memories for him, but Severus was also happy and excited to have a grandchild.

"What do you think, Shadow?" Luna asked as dinner was served. "Roberta would be a good name!"

"I suppose it is better than Peanut, but it's still hideous," Severus drawled, a sneer on his lips.

Draco snickered. "Besides, it's a boy."

"I think it's a girl," Neville added his opinion, smiling when Luna kissed him with approval.

"Course it is!" Luna nodded firmly.

"No, it's a boy," Draco argued, lifting his chin superiorly.

"The mother knows," Shadow said slyly.

Draco slapped his shoulder. "Shut up, you."

"And I said Peanut as a nickname!" Luna butted in.

"Why don't you stick to naming the hundreds of stuffed animals you two have insisted the baby needs," Severus suggested. "After all, they're safe from the ridicule of their peers."

Luna stuck her tongue out at her one-time Professor.

**xXx**

_~ December 1st, 2002 ~_

Shadow clasped Draco's limp hand in both of his. The evening had started so peacefully. Dinner had been amusing and light-hearted. How had things gone so wrong so quickly? Luna's water had broken and she'd gone into labor a little after they'd eaten. They all rushed to the hospital where Miles quickly secreted them into a warded surgery and out of sight. Then things had gone from bad to worse.

The baby was breach and resisting all magic, partly because of the complicated charms and spells that had allowed this to be possible in the first place. Draco had fainted, his blood pressure sky-rocketing. Luna wasn't faring much better, weak and pale and exhausted. Neville stood beside her, murmuring in her ear, while Shadow sat in a chair between her hospital bed and Draco's. Shadow encouraged her as best he could, but he couldn't bring himself to release his hold on his love. He needed Draco. He wouldn't be able to survive without him.

Miles stood between Luna's knees, chanting spells and using the dozen or so potions on a rollie cart beside him. He was sweating and also reaching his limits. This had been going on for over twelve hours. Shadow itched to transform and use his White magic to heal Draco and Luna, but if he did that, the progress Miles had made with shifting the baby could be undone. Shadow had no confidence he'd know not to heal Luna if he transformed, so he had to wait to heal them both until after the baby was born.

Luna had gone quiet making Draco's harsh pants and quiet moans ring loud in Shadow’s ears. Then suddenly a sharp, high cry split the air. Shadow instantly transformed. Seraphim came bursting into life. He shook his head, snorting to clear it of all the strong smells: potions, sweat, fear, exertion, blood! His mate's need instantly grabbed his attention, and with a fierce growl, he washed power down into the body of his mate.

In moments, the male settled more peacefully, his breathing deep and regular, color back in his cheeks. Turning, Seraphim tended to the woman. He sealed the torn tissues in her uterus and vaginal opening and stabilized her chemical systems. He ignored the large male who smelled strongly of earth, instead his attention caught on the weak cry of a cubling.

He took a step closer and the scent of his mate filled his nose. His mate's blood was all over the cub. Seraphim instantly understood that it was theirs. He growled dangerously, shadow's turning into spikes around him. The male holding his cub was intelligent. He instantly held out the child and Seraphim carefully gently snatched the small cub away. His wings snapped out as he turned around, hiding the cub and his mate from view as he slowly approached he bed.

Large grey eyes stared at the tiny cub in his arms. Seraphim smiled at his mate, feeling proud and protective. They had a cub of their own! He allowed one wing to curl forward, cleaning the little one of blood and also putting his own scent on it. The combined smell of him and his mate made Seraphim’s mouth water. This was perfect; this was right.

Shadow came back from the transformation, Seraphim's thoughts and instincts still filling his mind, and handed the now sleeping baby to his eager husband. It was a boy. Draco had been right. "He's beautiful," he whispered.

Draco nodded, too overwhelmed to speak. He stared into the wrinkled face of his son and felt triumph, adoration, and peace wash through him in alternating waves. The baby wiggled, a cooing cry escaping his small toothless mouth, his red face scrunching further. Draco stared, enthralled.

"You did so good," Neville's voice drifted across the room as he spoke gently to Luna.

"I'm glad," she tiredly answered, eyes still closed. "And now we can go exploring again. I've missed it."

Neville laughed. "Whatever you want."

"Thank you, Luna." Shadow left Draco's side to clasp her hand tightly. "This means so much to us."

"It was fun. Well, most of the time," she answered happily, the last word a yawn.

"Rest," Neville coaxed.

"Okay."

Shadow kissed her cheek and moved back to Draco's side. The baby was fussing and his love watched every move with a wide smile. Laughing softly, Shadow stroked Draco’s hair. Draco finally looked up at him, powerful emotion in his eyes. Shadow felt his throat tighten in response.

"Here," Miles interrupted the moment to hand over a warm bottle of milk. Draco immediately focused on the baby again. Miles looked to Shadow. "What are you naming him?"

"Scorpius Narcissus Snape," Shadow answered. He smiled at the picture Draco made with the precious baby. "I should go tell the others. I'm sure they're worried sick." He glanced at Miles seriously. "Watch them?"

"Of course," the man promised. He owed so much to Shadow and they were good friends. He wouldn't let anything happen.

Shadow nodded, but he still felt reluctant to leave. Forcing his feet to move, he slipped out of the room. The waiting area was full of people and everyone froze as they caught sight of him. Shadow felt a spike of anxiety as all those eyes settled on him, but he caught and held Severus's tight-eyed gaze and it calmed him down.

"They're all okay. We have a son."

A loud cheer went up and Shadow laughed, allowing Severus to embrace him. Sirius and Tonks were screaming cheers. George wasn't much better. Teddy and Marissa were clapping and dancing, while Hermione and Katie burst into grateful tears. Angie and Ginny soothed them as much as possible, large grins on their faces.

The fifth child of the second generation had officially arrived. A son descended from the lines of Potter, Black, and Snape had been born.

**~ The End ~**

**A/N: I** know there will be many questions on whether I will continue the story. To be honest, I started one, but I didn’t like where it was heading and scraped it. I might take it up again, but no promises. I’m pretty wrapped up in my Freedom series at the moment.

But feel free to give me ideas! I will definitely save them and who knows when inspiration will strike! :D All I can say, is if I did continue, Scorpius would be special in some way. I’m sure you guys have realized my love for abnormal psychology, so I’m sure that’s not a surprise.

I was thinking maybe OCD or autism. My first rendition had Scorpius as a genius who was extremely socially awkward. Somewhat like Sherlock Holmes, I guess, but not exactly. Anyway, I hit a wall with that pretty quickly. Genius is hard to write, turns out, especially if you aren’t one. :P

Thank you for reading! I couldn’t have done this without all the support and love!


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